Girls, Why does she keep looking at my account , is it because she doesn’t like that I like her photo or interested in me?

[Anonymous]

A girl who has a boyfriend , study’s at the same university as me. I followed her social media because she seems really nice and I think she’s hot too. At first I did try and talk but she never opened my message because she be a a boyfriend. But every time I like her photos she always stalks my profile story. But never responds. The first few times I just thought maybe she’s curious as to if she knows me after me following her socials and messaging etc. But she keeps viewing my story like 6 times now.

Also I once commented on her photo it didn’t know she had a boyfriend. I commented with a emoji 💥 implying it was great photo. And she deleted it Incase her boyfriend saw it.

I don’t message her or anything anymore. Also I believe her boyfriend is the jealous clingy type. I wear a lot of designer clothes , competitive bodybuilder and drive a new Mercedes which is rare at university’s (not that any of it matters)

, But even now if I like her photos she keeps stalking my profile. If she wasn’t interested then why she keep stalking my profile just if I like her photo. She has 100s of likes on her posts. I respect she has a boyfriend but just not sure why she keeps looking like 6 times already

[btbc92]

You know what you're doing. STOP. She is not interested in you and is scared of you. PERIOD. Your not there to respect her, you there for yourself. Leave that girl alone.

[Asker]

You have a point there is a social problem. I am interested in her. But it seems extreme to say scaring her, Im only following her social media Instagram accounts and liking her pictures? Yeah I guess I pursued her abit by complimenting her but Why wouldn’t she block me or hide her stories from me etc if she was so annoyed. I just don’t get why she keep looking at my profile and things just because I liked her picture or viewed her story. Loads people follow her

[btbc92]

It doesn't matter if you are or not. She is not looking for you and you as somebody who has common sense should do that job of leaving her alone. Period. She shouldn't have to tell you what to do. She keeps doing it because you're making her paranoid. There is no social problem. You think you can do whatever you want instead of minding your business and leaving women alone. You're not being friendly your sexually interested in her and it is not reciprocated. She doesn't need to block you, you just need to leave her alone and bother somebody else. It is not extreme, WE KNOW WHY YOU DO IT, and we aren't stupid. You just think we are and it is not appropriate. You shouldn't be pursuing random people at all.

[Asker]

Ok but I have to say you are making sweeping generalisations. I just thought she was cute and seemed a nice girl. But you cannot assume I’m after one thing and that is sex. Whilst there are a lot of guys who are after just one thing there are others who are not.

And if I don’t pursue someone I find attractive or think is nice. How would anyone ever meet someone new? there is a big social problem. That is how a lot of men treat women or objectify them because of how they are brought up and requires societal change. Hence why raping and sexual assaults and harassment are so high in places like UK and US.

I agree with you that I shouldn’t pursue her anymore than what I have and that is why I am not. But then consider if i don’t go out of my way to get to know someone I like then not a lot in life will happen. And social media has a huge presence these days.

[btbc92]

The moment you saw she was cute, was the moment you stepped over the line. It is not making sweeping generalizations. I have had to block and delete many guys who come on my accounts for the same reasons because I was "cute". No thanks.

"And if I don’t pursue someone I find attractive or think is nice. How would anyone ever meet someone new? there is a big social problem. " Or you can start by treating people like decent human beings and not because they are this or that physically. That's objectifying them. You don't pursue people, you get to KNOW people. And when that becomes your motivator this is why women pull back. It has 0 to do with just wanting sex. But because we KNOW you want sex. And we are telling you NO. And you don't listen. You meet people new by being friends, socializing, getting to know people because of their people. NOT because this one is "hot", this one is "cute", "Oh, he/she is not attractive, I don't want to get to know him/her". That is what makes people treat you the same way. Because it's intentions and agenda. And women are waking up to that trick.

"Hence why raping and sexual assaults and harassment are so high in places like UK and US." No. It's high because a lot of you men and some women have no respect for people. You lust you think it's okay and when a person pulls back or tells you no, you think it's exaggerated or in your terms, extreme when we make it very clear that we are not in agreement with it. I should not have to screen out every guy only to find out instead of a friendship he is with me for other reasons. This is why women can no longer trust men and giving up on men. You say your not the same, yet you come up with your own agendas to get a woman.

[btbc92]

Buddy, you like her physical. You don't know her and she is not appreciative of what you're doing. You can't like somebody you don't know. If she was ugly you wouldn't get to know her, so let's be real. You want to be in her pants eventually you desire her that way. That's wrong. That's how you men end up with no woman. Because that is how you see women and now women do the same and they're equally as miserable. A man should get to know a woman because he wants to get to know her, not because she is pretty, beautiful, hot, or whatever you want to say. The same rule applies to women. This how so many people end up miserable and only go after people who they now want to say treated them like "human beings" after people had their fun with those they found sexually appealing, but it is mostly based on sexual desires. Not love. I tell you this, I no longer trust men on that level because all they basically see is the body. Then when my body is no more than the next chick comes along that they want. I don't treat people like that. And it's very clear she is not happy of you doing that. Again, you are making her uncomfortable and would have done no different if she was single or not. She cannot trust you when your desires are influencing your choices. This makes women, in the long run, unhappy because she has to play up the physical just to keep her happy and she feels unloved in the end and wonders if there is better out there. It is very clear she is not the cheater type or else she will be pegging for your attention.

[btbc92]

The moment you call somebody cute for you men mostly, it is sexual. Like it or not. It is sexual. It is one thing to compliment without being sexual. It is another to be driven by sexual desires to express that. You already said "And if I don’t pursue someone I find attractive or think is nice. How would anyone ever meet someone new?" You admitted that you are driven by sexual desires. Not because you genuinely find somebody interesting and want to get to know them. We, women, know that if we see a cute guy, it is often sexual. We are seeking a sexual relationship. Whether she wants something serious or not is up to her, but 9/10x she wants to be in your pants eventually. Others like myself can see an attractive man, but if we approach you it is not because your attractive, but because we find you interesting and want to get to know you as friends. To be more than just friends is up to us to decide. Not you. You're entitled to what you want, but as you need to respect our wishes, we need to respect yours too. Any guy who assumes I want to be in his pants whether he rejects me or accepts me is not somebody I want to be around. Because I don't think like that. I need to have a strong bond with that person and it needs to be love. Not based on sexual desires. If that's the case, why wait for marriage or a relationship for that. Women wouldn't waste their time she would just have sex and she decides like men if she wants a permanent partnership or just having sex. Women cannot tell the difference between a man who loves her and a man who desires her or simply want to screw.

[btbc92]

In the end, a woman desires love. Not sex. If she desires sex, love would not be given. Love would be based if she gives sex or not. She knows if she gives sex, she gains benefits from the man. The man sees giving benefits or material as love, but it doesn't mean it is love. That's why whether married or not, anybody can have all the sex in the world, and still be unhappy. There is a reason people envy childhood and youth because it is often innocent. The truth is you men aren't happy with just a woman loving your heart. You want her to love your body for sex and how you have sex with her. That's it. The rest is just acting to gain sex in return. And in the end, you call that love. Men who aren't driven by their lusts and hormones are more attractive than guys trying to please me with his actions because he wants the panties. Let's be real. You don't love and don't know how to. You like the outside, not the inside. You men need to be more honest instead of lying.

[btbc92]

So, man, you need to be REAL with who you are as a man and stop pretending your innocent. Are you a man who has a real desire to love a woman regardless of who she is, or are you a man looking for an attractive person to have sex with? Who are you? And what do you really want? I mean, you can do whatever you want, you have free will. There are women out there who desire to be desired for what you want, but you have no right to push that onto others who don't see sex or love the same way. Any man can call me a so-called asexual, prude, or have sexual frustration, or whatever crap people want to spew because I don't lust after people. But at the end of the day he cannot make me desire or want sex with him if I don't WANT THAT or on my terms. If a woman like me wants an attractive man to have sex with, I could easily do that. Plenty of single attractive men to do that with. What does love have to do with sex? None. A woman who desires love doesn't actually just go after guys because he's attractive. They do because of hormones and lusts if not just urges. The world teaches us it's love or that lusts turns to love when that is not true. Lust is lust and love is love. It is not interchangeable. It either is or isn't. To lust is a choice, to love is a choice. Do you know why people rather lust? Because it's QUICK and EASY. Just like sex. You know why people say they want love but don't know how? Because they do what they do in lust and then get upset when it doesn't become love or is what they want. When they finally have to give up lust (the spark), and love is shown to be what is require work, people don't want it and then say "they fell out of love" = fleeting lusts.

[btbc92]

You people don't know what the hell you're talking about. There is a reason why rape etc is so high. Because we live in a hypersexualized world. These people want prostitution legal. They want to lower the age to have sex, they want to make marriage obsolete, and homosexuality a common practice, even a child can do it. Please explain to me how can it not get any worse? It's going to get worse. And you see the same mess in Japan now. This is why the birth rate is so low. They say it's the work hours and it's not that. People work long hours all the time and you see that everywhere, even here in America. Yet sexualization of women and girls are an accepted practice and girls are forced to be sexualized and young girls getting groped in public places. How can anybody say there is a difference between anime/manga or porn/movies/books/ etc and the real world when you're exposed to this every single day. This is wrong. PERIOD.

Psychology has done studies that those who exposed to much violence often find it normal and don't help those who have been victims of it than those who haven't. Because it's desensitizing humanity to it. You know so-called waiting for marriage to have sex is OUTDATED? Because now it's a free for all. The many times I had to reject guys because I know they were thirsty and try to smooth talk me with the "I want to take care of you..." which translates to "They want to take care of me... SEXUALLY." So come on, man. I'm not stupid. A woman can tell from her heart. Not her body. If a man loves her. This is why women are so-called attracted to "bad boys", because they don't have to pretend, they already know it's mostly sex but will play the "boyfriend" role if it means both gets what they want. Women learn this too late when they're in their 30s and 40s, which is when most of you men start desiring much younger girls and women 16+. So no. You don't love. You only tell us this if it means we open up our legs only to you. That's all.

[btbc92]

There is a reason why women don't tell you, men, what we want. Not just because you refuse to listen. But because we know you will try to mold yourself into that image to make yourself desirable. Once the mask is off, your lies get exposed along with the real you. Then you start questioning yourself and your sexual self-worth if you desire or not to procreate or lose your virginity. Because losing your virginity, having sex with different people, if not getting married, having a partner/girlfriend, or kids have become a status symbol. Instead of a blessing to have because you have a desire to love and spread love. It's a means for you to gain status, just like women now have done. Again, you people don't want love. You want status.

[Asker]

I think you are making generalisations of all people. Whilst there is truth to all your saying and I’m not disagreeing. You can’t say the same for every person. I do believe some men want status , they want to feel like men and powerful and don’t care too much about real love. But they soon realise this when they get older. For example , I know of some guys who are famous and have an abundance of women. However, all sexual and never last. They then regret the time wasted on flings.

Also a lot of people fall out of love , they become married and have children. They cheat or become very depressed and get divorced. Or become scared to leave each other out of fear of loosing financial stability or security. Being young and entering into relationships is innocent sometimes. Yes we live in a hypersexualised world. Which is a social problem. Something needs to be done on that part. And some men do lie but those are the ones that are not worth your time. T

And I think in order for someone to truly love someone they need to be happy and content and also have a purpose in life. For example , At this moment of my life I do not feel I am at the right point to truly love someone. Because I have to focus on my purpose in life. Needless to say there are sometimes women that I would like to know more. I truly believe it is not always sexual in my case. Maybe it is the idea of success is having a beautiful women , successful career , financial stability etc.

[btbc92]

"And if I don’t pursue someone I find attractive or think is nice. How would anyone ever meet someone new?" The moment you said this, everything else you say afterward gets thrown out the window. We are not talking about other men. We are talking about you. You can say purpose and all of that stuff. But now your lying to yourself. And other people.

[btbc92]

And to prove this, I have been single ALL MY LIFE. I am almost 30. I believe in having purpose, being happy on your own, and developing yourself. Does that stop me from getting to know people or men? No. Because my intent is not sexual or romantic. It is strictly platonic. You just say sometimes you see a woman and you want to get to know them. There plenty of women around you. Who exactly are you trying to get to know? Somebody who you find sexually attractive. PERIOD.

[btbc92]

It's not innocent. It's intentional. Do you know why kids can easily express that love? Because their bodies aren't yet flooding with sexual desires yet unless, like me, I started very early. But even then I knew as a child it was sexual urges before 10 years old. To say my desires was entirely innocent would be a lie. As we mature we are taught about sex and sexual desires and what sex is for. Then we become more interested in sex. But not the person. There is much conflict. And the younger when girls especially and some men, as I have friends who had sex young, are confused, and unhappy, and the next thing you know somebody got pregnant. And relationships failed. What is the difference between a child, a teen, or an adult having sex? There is no difference. The difference is that a child is EXPECTED to NOT KNOW ANY BETTER. A teen is EXPECTED to be all sexual and horny but is PREVENTED in the most cases from sexually expressing themselves but do so anyway. So we tell them, get a condom, go on birth control, have fun. Just don't get pregnant. If it was that easy, then why are men saying they don't want a woman with many partners? Yet it is EXPECTED that women have had sex as teenagers? But he doesn't want to marry a woman who's been out there? But if she doesn't accept his advances then she misses out on men? I don't understand this.

[btbc92]

What this has taught me as a virgin is that my desirability is only contingent if I am willing to be sexual. If not, then there is a sexual "deficit" somewhere according to society, if not men. Last I checked, my so-called "job" as a heterosexual woman is not to have sex with society but as a man. If a man doesn't find his desires as a person pleasing to him, he will find a woman who is more sexually inclined because that is what he mainly wants. It has nothing to do with generalizations or what some men do. But that men are not who they claim they say they are. This is why women turn to romance novels over "real" men. This is not generalizations. Just observations.

[btbc92]

"Maybe it is the idea of success is having a beautiful women , successful career , financial stability etc." See this is what confuses me more as a woman and not just me asking other women who say they want a handsome attractive man. What PURPOSE is having a beautiful woman. It is because she is beautiful at HEART/SOUL/MIND or her body? Many of you say both, but now what if we take the body away. Is she still beautiful? Or is she a beautifaul person, but not attractive? What you just said is what I just said. You want STATUS. That is considered in sociology or the study of sociology, status symbols or master status. You jsut said you want to gain master status by having these things off of your checklist:

1. A beautiful woman (most likely physically)
2. A successful career
3. Financial stability

[btbc92]

I can see 2 and 3 making sense because without it it is hard to live. But now what about #1. What is a beautiful woman's purpose? Procreation for sex? Now, what if that is not really what she wants to be all in a man's life? See, what you do not understand about a woman. It is not that she doesn't want sex. She just doesn't want to be seen as your only motivator to being with her, because you wouldn't put in a much attention, affection and effort if it weren't. Because in the end, everybody wants something. That is what makes it selfish. Because now you say you want love too, but if she treated you teh same way, and got another man you wouldn't be happy. You will say she was disloyal and how she never loved you. But what will be her reasoning? That she is entitled to be "selfish too". See? How is any of this moral? The amount of handsome and sexually attractive men I met, I rejected them for a reason. Because I know I desire love. If an attractive man was part of my plan, and yes it is a plan if you say that, I had to have been stupid to reject them all. It wouldn't be because I love him. It would be because he increased my status. And "material" to be shown to all. Just like man uses a woman. I don't care if you rich, poor, middle class, poor class, rich class, or your belief system. There is a reason you desire that. And it's not just for yourself. IT'S BECAUSE if you don't have it, you will be socially REJECTED. As human beings we treat people like objects and in turn we also desire to be seen as objects because that is how the world made it. It is not, again, generalization. But a fact. And sociology, science and psychology have proven this.

[btbc92]

"Also a lot of people fall out of love , they become married and have children. They cheat or become very depressed and get divorced. Or become scared to leave each other out of fear of loosing financial stability or security. Being young and entering into relationships is innocent sometimes. Yes we live in a hypersexualised world. Which is a social problem. Something needs to be done on that part. And some men do lie but those are the ones that are not worth your time." And do you know that God calls this SIN?

This is why I am by myself. SAFER that way. You think I want to be involved with a man who "falls in love" then "falls out of it"? How dumb do any of you people think I am? That ain't love. That is FOOLISHNESS. "they become married and have children." And as a child of such a marriage that was abusive and dysfunctional is marriage and bringing children in the world all in VAIN. Because people don't even know what it means to be married. "They cheat or become very depressed and get divorced. " Well when people do what you do, no wonder why it's normal. Do you think this just happen? Nope. There is a reason. And spoke why and it's' what you're doing that is feeding the cycle. And I have friends who got divorced, because of the very things you're talking about. Falling in love, getting married to the wrong kind of people who ain't not ready or wasn't really for them, and suffered through the same. Now being asks, what is love from a man? They don't know. They haven't been shown. So what are you talking about?

[btbc92]

"Or become scared to leave each other out of fear of loosing financial stability or security." This is wrong. Peopl don't become scared to leave out of fear of losing financial stability or just security. From what my late mother experienced with her abuse, from one of my friends many hundreds of talks with me about her marriage, divorce and her journey as a divorcee, is the fear of making MISTAKES. A woman gives up her BODY, a woman gives up her VIRGINITY, her LIFE, Her LIVELIHOOD of EVERYTHING she ever knew: friends, family, parents, her life before that man all for that 1 man, and then things go apart. The only reason why security is a fear is because a man's love is contingent on his finances and what he can financially and legally provide her: a car, a home, securing bills that it is "PAID" not "DELAYED", that the children is taken care of, fed, etc. What happened to me and my mom, I was a commodity in the marriage before her death. I was a threat to be taken away from her, to him wanting to teach me ANYTHING that wasn't Christianity, for another woman that he sexually desired to "raise me" and deem my mother to the courts as "unfit", and she was a housewife. And because she couldn't give him sex when and what he likes, he threatened to cheat on her and say other women were "better" than her in bed. And would be more than willing to give him sex, because she is the wife, he can have sex anytime he asks. And any sex he gives her is because he "loves" her. My friend was treated similary. But because she didn't want to do anything he saw in porn, he called her a prude. And that's his wife.

[btbc92]

Hmm. What else do men do? Oh yeah. Another guy one of my friends dated complained about how sexually frustrated he was because his "fiancee" wasn't given him sex. The moment she came to her new job at the time, she had many guys lusting after her, and some women even encouraged hooking up with those guys and she doesn't believe in doing any of that. I WARNED HER not to be around that guy. The next thing I know, they're dating. And everything the guy said his girlfriend was doing, he was already doing that to her. And once she dumped him, he went back to how he was before when he met her. My sibling is going through the same thing and always has been with her husband. He cheated on her, she in response did the same to him only once, they supposedly moved past it, he kept on doing it, and even lusting in the church. Now the sons are behaving similarly and their barely even legal adults, mirroring the father. My grandma, the same thing. I am now finding out my great-grandfather on her side did some abusive things to her mother. My grandfather who fathered my dad with her left her for another younger woman who had no children while she already had 4-5 kids by other men, 5 from her 1st (3) or 2nd husband (2), and already got her pregnant before marrying her bad enough she vowed to never marry another man again, and he impregnated her with baby number 6. My dad.

[btbc92]

I don't even want to talk about how my other friends I went to high school with, got their baby fathers or boyfriend or husbands at the time. OR a good few of the men on my late mother's side. Or the men the girls I grew up with within my old neighborhood ended up knocked up with. Or the boys that told me NO man is going to want me for a wife, mother, or girlfriend because I refused t have sex outside of marriage, give in to their sexual advances or welcoming them to "date" me, or because I don't agree with pornography, lusting and or masturbation, sex toys, and any other sexual filthy garbage people indulge in today.

The only men I can respect are those who also don't believe in doing those things and they have wives and families of their own. You think it is because they wanted a beautiful wive? No. It was because they develo=ped that love for them whether they were or not. They were beautiful to them whether they were or not and they have families. If they were, it wasn't because they were beautiful unless naturally that, but because of who their wives WERE and are. It is all my late mother wanted, my friend wanted, and my sister wanted. It was at one point would I WOULD have wanted. I got rejected because I rejected what they wanted to offer. And what you say you wanted.

[btbc92]

This is how you know you got a problem. You are so desperate for a "beautiful woman" you didn't even KNOW that same woman was dating another MAN. And even then you still showed 0 respect! And I have no doubt, even if she wasn't dating any guy, you would still BOTHER the woman even though her actions are CLEAR she is not receptive and you're looking for another way to get to her even though it is CLEAR AS DAY the answer is WALK AWAY. And because you can't get her or somebody like her you feel like a personal FAILURE. That is how very wrong you men who do this are, that includes the women who do the same. So no you are like other men. It is not because you don't do the same tactics. You just got tactics doing it DIFFERENTLY. I should not have to fear getting emotionally involved with a guy only for him to backout because he doesn't want to "be stuck in some friendzone." That's selfish. I would NEVER treat another man or a person like that out of false pretenses! No matter what I feel or what I think I personally want, it is not my PLACE to force my desires on another person. Even if that is supposedly what we both "claim" <- cuz their never a guarantee of anything, that is what we want, if it is not out of pure intent, I rather let go and pray he finds somebody else. Not manipulate a situation for my benefit. That is not love. It's selfishness. Last I checked, God never said that love was selfish. He said, love is kind, it is not SELFISH. So why are people so SELFISH?

[btbc92]

"4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away" 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 NIV

There is nothing certain in this world. And life have taught me that it is the exact opposite of what God had COMMANDED us to do. So any man who claims he loves me yet he does the opposite of what these verses say is not a man who loves, but a man who wants benefits. I at least know if I cannot trust a man, it is not because I don't love or don't want to, but that I can't because something is preventing me to do so, and it's that man. Because somewhere DEEP INSIDE OF HIM he is not telling me the TRUTH. I somehow bring the truth out of people. Just by being myself that so many men seem to hate so much because I reveal their true darkness all because I chose to walk in the light. Yet they desire my light, so for their own consumption, not elevation.