I'm just not happy anymore... why?

[princess_babe02]

For the past year, I've been very depressed.. I quit all my sports, stopped hanging out with friends and before I knew it, I was laying in bed all the time crying. It's just that, I don't feel like trying. I'm not happy. My family thinks it's just a phase but no one truly understands that I'm not happy. I have never talked to a doctor about being depressed because my family believes that is "embarrassing" to them and will just give people a reason to judge me. All I'm asking is for advice.. what are some types of things that I could do to become happy again.. I just want to be able to be happy with myself and then hopefully I'll be happy with other people.. It's obvious to others, they always ask me what is wrong and why I never smile.. I just say nothing is wrong, but honestly.. everything is wrong, I just don't know what to do anymore.. I'm sick of crying in my bed all day alone.. I want someone to finally understand what I am going through..

[Anonymous]

You have fallen into the vicious cycle of depression. It is a hard road, however you can get through it. Your family may be embarrased by the thought of having a depressed child, however if they were educated about it they would understand that the majority of the population will go through a period of depression at one time or another. If they will not get you a counselor seek one through your school, it is confidential, unless you report that you are having any suicidal/ homicidal ideations or thoughts of hurting youself. The first step is to force yourself to get back into the activities that you once enjoyed. It will be hard but it will be the first step in breaking the cycle. It all begins with your thoughts about yourself and the world around you. What are they? Write them down. How do you behave when you are feeling depressed? Reality-test your thoughts (what is the evidence against them?) What behaviors are counterproductive to your happiness? Your thoughts create your reality. Our thoughts create our feelings, our feelings lead to our behaviors and our behaviors lead to consequences. What thoughts and/ or behaviors could be changed to create a new reality. Write down things every day that make life worth living, from the most frivoulous things to the most important. You need to change how you think and starting to try to focus more on the positive things in life rather than the negative. When one looks through a negative lense they will only see the negative, however if one looks for the postive they will also find it. Okay easier said than done, but it is possible. Again the first step is to get out of bed and force youself to participate in activities. Also when others smile at you smile back even if you do not feel like it, just the act of smiling can help to alleviate depression even if your not feeling it at the time. I wish you the best in your endeavor, you can do this, but it will not be easy. But nothing worth anything is easy.

[yeahwho]

Sweet heart, you could be experiencing such things for several reasons but to approach it on your own is a start. Do these things and I promise you, you will begin to see a difference. Be diligent though to keep up with it and log your progress.

1.) Have an outlet- writing, journaling, diary, counselor, friend but something to help you begin to process your thoughts and feelings. Keeping things in can make you sick.

2.) Eat right: Eat plenty of fruits and vegetables

3.) Multi vitamins and added calcium, b-12 can promote higher energy

4.) You need to do something physically active and social.

5.) Last but not least, change your mind. Fake it before you make it. Smile. Thank god to be alive another day. Make a list of positive things you believe about yourself and begin reminding yoourself of those good things when negative thoughts enter.

Put up a fight and selective on whom you tell your personal struggles to. If your family isn't helpin look at other avenues. Take care of you and don't worry about what others think.

I wish the best for you and keep up the good work.

[kaytii]

well honey, I understand what your going through this happened to me last year and in the end I just decided to try every different thing I could to try and make me happy and to just ignore what everyone else thinks of me. I tried hanging out with a new group of people, drugs, alcohol but to be honest the only thing I found that keeps me happy is spending 1 to 1 time with girls and guys (I don't mean talking either). I know that if rumors get spread it could ruin a reputation but at the end of the day you just do what you want and ignore anyone who tries to tell you that your wrong. <3

[MrScTi]

You need to find a reason to be angry. Rage is what drives people out of their rut. I'm not talking about throwing tantrums and smashing every fragile item in sight. Just rage that people are fine, yet you aren't. It's not fair that you're down like this, while everyone else is happy. You did nothing wrong, you don't deserve this, yet it's happening? Fuel yourself. Your back is against the wall, and you can't let little things keep you there. Take small steps and win back your life inch by inch, and give nothing in return.

You know why this is the only way out? Because people are cold. They only want your good side, and have no patience when you've fallen behind. Every day is all about "what have you done for me lately". You've done nothing, and guess what? They no longer care. That's why you are alone and depressed, and the mentality is consuming you like cancer.

So stop counting on them. Stop counting on your parents. Medication is a crutch, and won't change your mindset. You have to channel the fighting spirit within yourself to bounce back and be who you are capable of being. There is no other way.

[MikeK]

Could not have said it better myself.

[princess_babe02]

I agree, definitely the best answer I have read.

[micricjac]

ideally find the root of why you feel like this - seeing a counselor may help

try new things exercise is good as much as you don't want to do it it does work I've been depressed quite a few times

maybe try saying to your parents that's its your life and you think it may benefit yourself if you see a doctor

maybe go back to what you used to enjoy

meet up with friend

keep yourself active :)

[XxLisaBabyxX]

my friend had the same problem. if I were you, I would try to find out when this all started. after my breakup I cried and moped around. but then, when I spent time with my friends, played soccer and got back to everything, I was happy againn. try to be more social... plus, guys LOVE when a girl is happy and cheerful. just look on the plus sides of things. when life gives you a thousand reasons to cry, show life you have one reason to smile and use it :).

[Anonymous]

You're not alone a lot of people go through what you are. Honestly find something you're passionate about,something that you really want. I'm still going through with depression but a month ago I found something that I'm passionate about something I believe in and it gives me the strength to move on and I'm beginning to live my life again.

[Anonymous]

think about why you are not happy? what is it