(Serious) Should I approach her or not?

[Anonymous]

There's this girl I really like in my work place and I've been seeing her for a month and I haven't talked to her yet.

I really like her and I don't know her name or age. Either she's my age 23 or slightly 2 years older. Not sure she's a permanent employee.

I made some observations on her.
1. She is very very introverted and not a people person.
2. She stares at me when I'm far away and ignores me when I'm near.
3. She looks at me when I'm not looking at her
4. She searches for me casually when entering cafeteria (Where we often come)
5. She tries to sit in a place where I can't see her face or have eye contact.
6. She looks at me very angrily when eye contact happens.(she won't even blink and feels like death stare)

Should I approach her or she staring at me angrily is a way of telling me not to approach her? Or should I approach her as a friend?

[Oliverlogan263]

Damn bro, this is tricky. On one hand, her staring at you is definitely interesting - seems like you've caught her attention for sure. But the angry/intense looks when making eye contact are throwing me off.

A few thoughts:

- Her being really introverted could explain avoiding you in person. Might just be super shy.

- Angry stares though... I don't know man, could be she's into you but afraid to show it? Or maybe you do something that rubs her the wrong way. Hard to say.

My advice would be try waving or smiling real friendly from a distance first, see how she reacts. If she seems annoyed still, I'd probably leave it alone. But maybe she'll relax a bit or even wave back.

If she seems okay, try casually finding an excuse to strike up a quick, low-pressure conversation sometime. Keep it light, don't put her on the spot. See how the interaction goes before deciding if you should ask her out.

Go with your gut too - if those stares creep you out, don't feel obligated either ya know? At least you'll know either way after a short chat. Just be cautious and respect her space is all. Let me know how it turns out bro!

[Avicenna]

Approach her, start a ordinary convo and see how it goes

[SueShe]

No, you definitely do not approach her.

From your descriptive, she clearly does not want you to approach her. The fact that she checks if you look (or stare) at her indicates that she sees you as a potential threat. Not a physical threat but more a threat to her wellbeing. She does not want to interact with people but you put her in an uncomfortable situation by trying to gain her attention.

You also have to ask yourself. What are your ultimate intentions by approaching her? Is it simply to talk to her or is it something more personal like a wish to "interact" with her on a physical basis?

If the latter is you ultimate goal, then forget it and let her be.

[_Maya_]

Sorry about that last one. You wrote out a long opinion and I removed the question because it was the wink troll. My bad.

[SueShe]

@_Maya_ Thanks for acting upon those trolls. I guess I will survive this one as well. I need a big tall drink though. Let me fetch my glass of... water!

[Momma-404]

Hard telling.. I would just talk with her and see. I mean you’re already very closely observing her behavior & it kind of seems like you might be reading too much into it, especially since she hasn’t done anything to even make you think she could be interested

[Momma-404]

Like how do you know for sure she’s casually searching for you in the cafeteria?

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't take those as signs that she’s interested, at all. Also, how can someone like a person this much yet not even know their name or never talked to them?

[In_Trance]

Don't try to fuck your coworkers