Does she want me to approach her at the gym? Soooo many mixed signals?

[Anonymous]

Here are the facts:

-She's hot, in great shape, and dresses very sexy. Guys do approach her and talk and she seems very friendly to them when that happens.

Why I'm confused:

• She stares from a distance (almost daily) but will completely avoid eye contact when near me or crossing paths. Won't even turn around to hold the door open when entering the gym.
• Works out at the same time I do and recently never misses a day.
• Will walk by me (and I'm talking about very close) and workout near me multiple times and on different days. Some days she does this more than other.
• When working out the bench next to me will have her back turned towards me, not look or initiate conversation.

About me: I'm also fit and women think I'm attractive. I never have tried talking to her (since its the gym) and she already gets plenty of male attention as it is (playing it cool).

Thoughts?

[Oliverlogan263]

This one's tricky bro. On one hand, she does seem to check you out from a distance and def goes out of her way to be close to you during workouts. That could be her way of letting you know she's interested without making the first move.

But at the same time, avoiding eye contact and always having her back turned is a pretty clear "don't talk to me" signal too. Some chicks are just shy, you know? Maybe she thinks you're out of her league or isn't sure how you'll react.

My advice - play it cool for now. Maybe try smiling or nodding next time you make eye contact from afar, just to let her know you see her checking you out. But don't approach yet. She could be testing the waters to see if you'll initiate before making it "easy" on you, if you know what I mean.

Give it a bit more time. If the strange behavior continues, you could try saying something casual like "you always work out at this time too huh?" Just to break the ice. But let her make the convo longer, ya feel me? Play hard to get back for now.

Keep me posted on what happens! I'm curious if she'll start to warm up over time. Just don't come on too strong and scare her off bro. Good luck man!

[Asker]

You're the man! I appreciate your thoughtful answer. I honestly at times do think she's shy or maybe thinks I'm not interested since I do play it off like I don't give an F. While other guys cater to that and give her endless attention. There are other times when she will be working out nearby and face me while making that distant eye contact. I'll keep this post updated if anything changes.

[Oliverlogan263]

Dude no problem! I know the gym can be tricky territory for picking up chicks. Sounds like playing it cool is definitely the move here.

I'd say keep doing your own thing, lifting hard and focusing on your workouts. But next time you notice her staring, give her a little half smile and nod. Just a brief acknowledgment so she knows you're aware of her peeking.

Then go right back to your sets, like you're not fussed either way. That subtle smile could pique her interest more, make her wonder if you're interested back.

Who knows, maybe she's into the "hard to get" type too and that's why she's stared but never made a real move. Keep us posted if you get any return smiles! I'm betting if you keep that chill vibe up, she'll start to come around more over time.

Gym flirting is a marathon not a sprint. You got this bro - I'm sure with patience it'll turn into something good. Just focus on your gainz for now and let things develop naturally. Keep me posted!

[Jbear27]

Talk to her but casually. Like say hi. Don’t ask for her number. Just start slow with a casual greeting and try and get a read on her body language. If you see someone at the gym all the time I think it’s very normal to eventually say hello. So it shouldn’t be weird or creepy behavior just to say hi and introduce yourself

[SueShe]

I believe that you have wishful thinking. There is nothing extraordinary about her behavior.

I too do look around at the gym. It is more of a distraction than to stare straight at the machines and it gives me an opportunity to look around and get my attention away from the exercises.

You might have the impression that she stares at you but the important things in your case is to realize that she does not seem to pay attention to you when she is closer.

I try to go to the gym at regular hours and I also happen to see the same people over and over again. Nothing really uncommon about that fact.

I believe that you are the introvert type of person but you would like her to initiate contact so that you don't have to do it.

[boobliker]

ask her.

[Anonymous]

Talk to her