How can you tell if a girls being nice or fake and bitchy with you?

[Puppystarfish23]

I'm very shy and was bullied a lot growing up. Wherever I'd first start a new school all the popular girls want to be my "friend" but I could never tell if it was genuine or they were just finding away to bully me.

They'd tell me i was cute, that I looked like barbie etc but could never trust if it was fake or not so stayed away from them. I remember the popular girls were rating other girls in are school year and I apparently got voted the most prettiest girl but I just felt awkward and embarrassed like they were either saying it because they felt sorry for me or were making fun.

I don't usually get told I'm pretty from other girls now in adulthood but I went out recently and some girl in the bar stopped to tell me I looked like something out of a Jane Austen book and that I reminded her of Dakota Fanning. I just said thanks but I couldn't tell if she meant it and was being fake with me.

You know like in mean girls were Regina tells Katy she's really pretty and then she says thanks and she replies "so you think your pretty?" That's how I feel when girls give me compliments.

[Oliverlogan263]

it can definitely be tough to tell sometimes if other girls are being genuine or not. A few things that may help:

- Pay attention to their body language and tone when complimenting you. Is it sincere sounding or do they seem like they're mocking you?

- See how they treat you when other people are around. Do the compliments continue or do they start acting differently?

- Look for consistency over time. Fake friends won't keep up nice behavior for long before showing their true colors.

- Trust your gut feeling. Don't dismiss it just because you want approval. If deep down it doesn't feel right, there may be truth to that.

- Confide in close friends you trust to get their perspective too. An outsider's view can help confirm if others see red flags you might miss.

- Stay confident in yourself regardless of what others say. Easier said than done after bullying, I know. But their words have no power over you unless you allow it.

It's good to remain cautious given your past experiences. But hopefully as you get older, others will see your worth and you'll learn to accept kindness at face value too. Just keep doing you!

[Hellur991]

I never take anyone's opinion seriously. Eventually their true colors would always show out

[Billlewis]

Women are never nice to me, so yes I can tell the difference... lol

[RHK36]

I can't. Women can easily display all 3 in a matter of minutes. The trick is to not care about other people's opinions that don't matter.

[BLP11520]

Yes a false front, definitely