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I pay a lot of the time... I think he may be manipulating me into it. He never asks me to he just always talks about his money problems. Now that I've done it so many times I feel bad for only paying for myself or for expecting him to pay; it seems like I'm accusing him of using me and it's an awkward topic to get into. The truth is, I don't have any money. I'm paying for his dinner with my bank loan.
"Men will only treat you the way that you allow them to."
What a load of crap. The trith is most men love women and treat them with respect. Maybe its just that women like you refuse to date anybody but narcissistic douchebags, then tell people "all men are like that" when they use you. More ignorant man bashing.
Maybe you should tell women not to use men, especially the part about not turning your partner into a human atm. Most women refuse to even consider a guy unless he pays or the first date, and there are far more female gold digfers out there than women want to admit. Notto mention all the women who use men. But thats ok theyre women so they get a pass from people like you I guess.
Nicely put :)
Women like me? I've been with the same person for 9 years.
Also, it's sad that you take only that line from my ENTIRE article when I am clearly stating that there are certain men who treat women in a horrible way.
I am speaking about those who LIE, CHEAT, AND STEAL.
Why are you getting offended? are you one of them?
Clearly so, since you feel the need to defend the scums of the Earth.
Let me be like you for a moment, and pretend that all men are saints, nice, and respectable.
Also, stop turning this into a sexist war when I clearly stated men go through this too.
@Maggimay you seem easily impressed.
Yes that is what I am saying. There are some men out there who LIE CHEAT AND STEAL. There are also women out there who reject all guys, but the ones who LIE CHEAT AND STEAL. That was my point. Many people have noticed this among certain women.
As for you saying men could be used as well, a small paragraph at the end saying, yea bad stuff can happen to you too.
@maggimay thank you :)
Opinion owner,
So, your point is pretty much MY POINT.
I've been saying those things all along in my entire article, so what exactly is your problem with me?
Also,
I don't need to write an essay to men to let them know how I feel.
It was already made clear.
I am a woman writing from a woman's perspective.
I've also noticed a majority of GAG members (women) complain about being used.
This take is for them.
I also acknowledged that men go through this as well, and that BOTH shouldn't allowed themselves this treatment.
Great Take! We can't control what a person does only how we react and choose to deal with.
Great post. Its ridiculous how you meet so many more broken women in liberated amd modernized western countries than so called "women hating" countries.
reason being that the west has made a habit of pedestalizing the most pathetic and wretched people in human existence. The worse they are the more publicity they get. they prefer the 'bad boy'.
Yeah... using someone is douche. Douche attracts girls, ergo I would lean towards the "using" rather than the not. Another reason why sex won't keep somebody by you, is simply because the notion of loving just one person is false. You can love more than one person and obviously be attracted to another.
Despite the statistics showing that polyamourus relationships have a higher rate of failure then monogomous? You can be attracted to more then one person but most polyamourus relationships fall apart due to either jealousy or the inability to balance mulitple relationships resluting in a slide back to monogoumus relationships.
Can you show me these statistics? The last I read, there was no difference in the failure rate between married or poly relationships.
Works both ways, I am not gonna weep for every idiot out there that gets exploited, man or woman, that's all just fair game and if they can learn from it, that is invaluable first hand life experience, if not, well that's too bad.
I like the last quote, it has merit.
Sometimes users can be hard to spot, unfortunately. Great take though. I feel it applies to both genders.
Yes, users can be hard to spot.
But one thing that is clear to see is that a person's actions do not lie.
Someone that cares for you acts a certain way.
I think the fact of the matter is.
That some people get themselves so emotionally wrapped up that it is hard to WANT to spot these things.
They remain in-denial to this situation.
In my take, that is why I said "do not allowed yourself to be blinded".
And yes, this take can apply to both genders which is why I mentioned men towards the end.
But as a female ---who is heterosexual (I have observed on this site) mostly women stating that they were used or taken advantage of.
So I decided to make a take for them.
But pretty much any one can benefit from this as previously stated.
Any guys that act like this don't deserve a girl but these r city guys if u go to a small town u will get what u want but u should just not put your self out there that easy u should be able to c this befor the relashionship starts if not u rushed
i dont agree with you Anonymous. My man of 8 years and we have a daughter together (we split 3 days ago) , he is a country boy from a small town and he is a example of why your wrong on of men holding things against people and not trying to move past them ( not all small town country guys are what you say), that is why our relationship didn't work. He hold onto the past and bases that on who you are, and that is not the case at all. If anything small town guys take things harder then city guys, so it ends up being worse sometimes. Im not saying all small town guys are like that but ya just cause your from a small town does not mean you get what you want Trust Me on that.
"You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don't try to forget the mistakes, but you don't dwell on it. You don't let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space." she couldn't be more correct!
I agre with that but every one has problems and I think every girl can look out for herself and this post just kinda puts guys down
I agreed with you anonymous. I misinterpreted your words since I did.
This post clearly uses the word "some men" throughout the entire article. It also differentiates the difference between what a man that loves his woman would do for her.
I think the guys drawing offense are great at twisting my words and inserting the word "all" which I never placed in this article.
No matter how safe on the rocks I am with phrasing people will see what they want.
After reading this, I know I am not ready (never was) to have a serious relationship.
Why do you not think you are ready?
I was in a very stressful relationship. I caused most of the problems. I just don't want to go through something like that, again.
You can grow in time.
At least u realize that
More interested in growing spiritually. That will take care of all my problems.
I am extremely glade I saw some because otherwise I would have felt very offended.
I have a habit of not reading what I type because I sorta just press enter on instinct sorry for the poor grammar , but what I was trying to say was that I am glad that you included the word, "Some" when talking about men. I agree with most if not all of your points you have made. In this article and I am quite happy on the fact that you acknowledged that there are men who are good people. I think men are much more likely to be swayed over to being assholes and idiots.
Thanks for your comment!
You strike me as a mature fella, surprisingly u are only 16.
These grown men 18 plus who are trolling or harboring hate can learn a lot from you <3
I've never pressured a girl into sex and I've gotten nothing buy a good rep. To the point they date scum bags and want me back and I'm not going back to them. Their female friends can't love trying to meet up with me after we are over.
Everyday I am losing my feelings about sex :)
Maybe due to my beliefs, who can know...
The only thing i know that humankind has to keep him/herself till marriage;the other way will bring problems eventually; i respect all and this is my opinion ^_^
"If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay" - That's such a weird thing to say because it begs the question what makes him want you in the first place? And are you sure sex isn't part of it?
That's a quote I picked up from Oprah Winfrey . Here is my personal break down of it.
"If a man wants you , nothing can keep him away ".
He loves you. He will go the distance for you. He is fully invested in you. He will not let obstacles get in the way of being with you.
"If he doesn't want you , nothing can make him stay ". You can beg , plead with a guy. But if he isn't fully invested in you there is nothing you can do that will change the outcome.
@Stacyzee This should have been more for everyone and not just ladies.. nice take:]
Based on my observation with gag, I have noticed mostly women asking questions pertaining to being used. That is who I wanted to go with.
I still acknowledged that men go through the same thing.
However , we cannot ignore that there is no such thing as gender specific scenarios.
I feel that some of these aren't lines aren't in applicant to men (pretty much only the human atm).
I may make a version of this to cater to men more.
@Stacyzee I Agree with most of this Mytake to a certain degree. But what you just said about mostly women being abused isn't really true. I've seen a lot of Mytakes and question about men/boys being concerned of how there girlfriend treats them. And mostly about financial abuse. But maybe that is just me. Anyway, have a nice day.
@Stacyzee Men go through the same thing but they are less vocal about it because of societies expectations
I'm not claiming mostly women are abused.
I am saying I have observed women speaking about it on here far more.
You are right about women being more vocal about it.
I made a mytake for men on this
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a21856-men-don-t-allow-ladies-to-use-you here
Thank you:)
No problem
Well women use men too but I agree what you said in most parts
"Women use men too" as already stated in this take.
I know you did I was just recaping I have a bad habit of doing that
It's okay.
I'm just making sure because there's a lot of people they say I didn't... and that's just because they only skimmed through and missed that part.
Thanks for commenting!
Nice take, similar to - men dont let women use you.
Great take you made it so friendly free from misandry and misogyny.
Thank you :).
Yes , similar in nature because I wrote both.
Having sex to keep him in a relationship makes you a prostitute
Yes, just without the pay.
It doesn't have to always be money, trading sex for things other than the act of sex itself is prostitution.
Most prostitutes prefer money.
But I get what you mean.
Some sort of benefit.
exactly
I believe 90% women don't know these things. Perfect! Very spot on. World would be a better place if women'd tackle these basic problems.
It sounds crazy but sometimes I swear that my ex (if you want to call him that) mistreats me then writes these MyTakes to give me advice. Smfh.
And I walk this fine line of trying to be nice while setting boundaries. As result we barely talk. Big surprise there. Lol
Shouldn't this just be called: People, don't let other people use you? Literally none of these are woman problems.
I notice that men tend to use women for sex , women tend to use men for money. I am currently creating a male version about this which will be different in approach. We cannot ignore the fact that some situations are gender specific.
Also, based on my observation with this site it has been most blatant to see that women tend to ask questions pertaining to being used (rarely have I seen men cry about this issue). I wanted to help those girls. This is my reasons for acknowledging mostly that gender in this take.
I still acknowledged that men go through this. I know advice is universal.