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This mytake makes me think deeply and makes me realize how dating can suck for me sometimes. Sometimes it seems like women are in a lose lose situation.
If we are easy we may be seen as slutty by a guy but if we wait then we may be seen as stuck up or manipulative.
This is why I hate dating sometimes because like you wrote, some men can be hypocritical. And I use to be easy but now I'm not. But i have had some guys tell me after the first date that they did not want to date me because they felt I was not into them.
I'm single and don't get me wrong I have nothing against relationships if it's a healthy one but some men act like they want a prefect woman when they are not perfect themselves. And the messed up part is some guys will deny the parts you wrote in your mytake and say that they don't feel this way about easy or prudish women but they may be lying
I think this mytake was very detailed
*perfect
Some of us really do appreciate an experienced woman (call them a slut if you will then I'm one too). I married a virgin well actually we had sex after the 3rd date. Sex sucked so I made excuses. It will get better after we're married, after the kids. It didn't it still sucked. I was miserable for 20 years. I had a lot of experiences before and a lot after. Give me a wild screaming multi orgasming woman and I'm happy. And since our sex life is awesome I don’t care how she learned.
Wow! Well said! This is a great mytake. I would say i went through my slutty phase and unfortunately it happened while i was in my only serious relationship. After we broke up i took some time for myself and just like anyone i didn't trust women for a while. Its been almost a year since i hooked up with 1 women all because im focused on my self. So i would say we all go through these phases at some point in our lives.
I want a woman who is loyal and someone who has some of the interests i have. And of course a woman who is confident. A few sexual partners in the past is good but if she's going into a relationship she has to fight for it and make it work as much as i do so a balanced woman would be the one inwoukd wsnt and maybe a lot of guys want.
If only the majority f women knew this. Withholding sex and bitching about girls who give into sex are common things for girls with low self esteem who want to prove that they are PURE or something. We don't judge girls like that. We want to be with a woman with whom we feel like the relationship is going forward. ANyway, extremely awesome take.. nicely written. Eager to read some more from you.
Nice stuff. I just want an attractive woman with a low count who views sex the same way as I do. I've never been one to sleep around because sex is more than just physical to me. So women who went on the cock carousel definitely don't appeal to me. But I don't want a girl who stonewalls me either. I just want a girl who I connect with at all levels so the sex we have is both physical and emotional. In the end I want to feel special with her and knowing I'm on a long list of dudes doesn't make me feel special. It just makes me this week's guy.
I like the woman who is the lady you'd like to meet your mother when she's in the living room with your parents and the slut your mother warned you about when you close the bedroom door. She has to know when to be which.
The reverse is true also. I try to be the model respectful gentleman when in public and the forceful Dom when the bedroom door is closed. She seems to really like that.
Yes, I described this type of woman in my previous take!
Lady in the streets but a freak in the bed :)
I've never had this problem. I've never had sex with someone I wasn't in a serious relationship with. I think I'm considered the well balanced woman. I've never slept with someone right way. The earliest was probably close to a month. Longest was probably 3 months. Except for my first time, that guy waited close to a year. Lol
I go with the flow. When it feels right. I won't have sex just because I want to rip his clothes off and have an orgasm. I have to want more and know he does as well and that takes getting to know each other. It takes some time. But I might have been considered the prude. At some point but I've never had a guy complain about waiting or leave me for it. So I don't truly know that. But I think I wait a reasonable amount of time.
I want a woman who doesn't care what men think of her for being slutty, I want her to be true to herself and not bother with society's skewed and retarded ideals. Girls who concerns themselves with the opinions of others are the one who I think don't value their bodies, or themselves. Being slutty has nothing to do with it.
Stacy, you usually have pretty insightful ideas and thoughts, but I must say, this My take disappointed me greatly.
I am objective in this article and writing out my observations.
When people learn I am not inserting my personal views of what I think is right or what I think is wrong , only then will they be able to truly an article and understand "Okay, this really does exist. Perhaps the problem lies with society and not the writer themselves ".
*able to truly read an article
All I am doing is bringing something to light that has existed for hundreds of years. My subjective views are no where to be found in this take.
Your disappointment should lie within society for making some people feel they have to change themselves to be accepted , not with me. I wasn't bored one day and made up how people are viewed or how things work.
My comment still stands, regardless of your beliefs. What you wrote is what was disappointing, I said nothing about your beliefs.
I specifically stated your thoughts, insights, and ideas. Not your beliefs.
You can stand by your opinion but I am not the creator of widespread ignorance that contributed to stigmas making those fear how they should operate sexually. All I am doing is exposing what is usually overlooked. That is all. Thanks for commenting !
*contributes
no, but you are perpetuating them.
Anyway, usually you do have good insights, this one was just a little off. It was a bad approach to the subject. A well balanced woman could have 0 partners or 1,000 in the end, I know you understand that, it was just not shown in this article.
I did write towards the end that a well balance woman can really be anyone. I also stated placing judgment isn't always accurate but it may hold valid accuracy.
You seem to have slid by those same points you're staying I didn't make that I clearly did.
I think your view is in the minority of my approach to the article. Plenty of others have enjoyed it.
What I have learned on here with my takes with as much viewers as one article gets, it's purely impossible to please everyone. It simply cannot happen.
I'll roll with the punches and accept your view.
***may hold valid accuracy in certain circumstances (in other words what you think may not be right or it very well could be)
The point isn't to please anyone, it is to share meaningful content, this just didn't do it. I know how to read, that isn't the issue here.
Like I said , you're in the minority of those who feel that way. People are always sensitive over gender topics.
The point is not to please everyone , you're right but like I said it would purely be impossible for everyone to love my article.
I've never seen "everyone" agree with or like the same thing.
It's something that comes along with any crowd. I'm 100 percent okay with it too
Stacy I am laughing. I usually hate and despise your articles. I will not go into the reasons but you have read them from the under various pseudo names. However this one particular was well written and well thought out and I considered to be rocksolid correct. I complement you. So I disagree with the guy disagreeing with you. I would also add that getting too hung up on whether you must be seen as a slut, prude, nutcase or normal girl can rob you of spontaneity and individuality. But even thinking about that too long can drive you insane. So I stick by approving your article
Who cares what men want like love and dont want. I dont understand why women get themselves into competition s over what a man wants and needs. They are not worthy. If they could have all the money and
woman in the world they would take it in a heartbeat, so that tells you everything you need to know about the men women obsess about. They do not care about what you want so why do you.
You must have met the wrong kind of men
you have either only dated bad boys or you have been brainwashed into man hating radical feminism
Who cares what women want or think.
I don't think so, Stacy. Most of us are like women, we want someone who takes our heart and gives hers. Whether or not she sleeps with us at a given time isn't really an issue... That follows after what happens with her heart.
I've seen plenty of women slut shamed for sleeping around too soon You opposite in regards to this, but there's no denying that this does not happen.
the number of sexual partners does matter to lots of guys i know so it does exist
RIGHT! Well said.
Finally someone said it
You're viewpoints are spot, and wonderfully written. I think there's definitely a slutty/prudish label that is sadly set in stone with all guys. Even guys with low sex counts think this way too. As most of my guy friends think this way. Even religious ones think that as well.
Spot on*
I think guys put to much emphasis on how many guys she has slept with.
If girls did the same thing that would wipe out most of the guy population... the double standard thing is just stupid.
If the perfect girl for me had slept with a bunch of guys the only thing that would matter is if I am the last and whether she has got it out of her system.
Girls are just as entitled as guys to sew their oats as long as by me she would be ready for a relationship, and she was absolutely the best thing for me, then it would be short sighted to overlook her!
Hm... This went beyond my expectations. I was expecting you to go based of of physical features (such as short, thin, pale skin, etc) and I was about to rage but you actually described women based off personality and I like that lol it is very well written.
But to me, I think everyone, men or women, should stop basing their value off of what the oppsite sex wants and just be their self! If they stop trying to please the oppsite sex and stop wasting so much time and energy doing so, then they would be so much better off! Be yourself and the right person will come eventually!
Anyway that's my two cents. I'm expecting a "What Women Want" take from you in the near future. ;)
I think this is a very well written, fair MyTake that takes the time to not play into stereotypes.
I think I'm a balanced woman. I think guys who never dated me might think I'm a virgin, every guy that I've dated has always thought that in the beginning. But I think there's a difference between virginal and prude.
I would be the prudish woman. I commit to a strict no-sex lifestyle. I have never been approached by a guy or flirted by a guy, but even when they do attempt to flirt or approach me for dating, I most likely never notice. I am not entirely sure whether guys would like a woman like me, and I am not entirely sure whether I am even heterosexual. I am clearly not a lesbian; I have never entertained the idea of being with another woman. So... I am just going to say "asexual" as the closest descriptor for me.
On behalf of all men, I am here to deliver the bad news. No, we're not into asexual women - it kinda defeats the point of dating/relationships.
Asexuality is common in women
It's healthy to have boundaries and still be open enough to enjoy what life has to offer. Sex is not a bad thing but it's ok to make sure you're sharing it with the right person♡
So are you a well-balanced woman?
I try to be♡
I feel I'm well balanced. The man I'm with now of 4 years and I have a lot together. When we met for the first time, we sat outside for hours even after the sun went down, and before I said goodbye he kissed me, which caught me off guard actually, because things were so easy I saw him as an instant friendship, but so close. So after that kiss, I went home and thought about him all night but neither of us had eachothers numbers. after about 3 days, he got my number from my sister and asked me to hang out, we had a couple drinks and had sex that night. And we've been together ever since.
Here is my take:
I was with my ex for 16 months so almost a year and ahalf and I thought she was the one my big love and we didn't have sex because she had a perfect vision. In the end she broke my heart and i still get feelings of hate towards her. She did not cheat on me but would have come close.
Then I met my current girlfriend and we slept with each other after a month and we are still together now and I still love her.
I think what men want is someone they can love even though a lot of people say sex isn't as important to men as to women, and those people are mostly right, it is still important.
Anyhow thats just my take
In regards to your comment on the prudish woman.
"But ladies, if this is the path you choose please let a man have reassurance that the both of you, will eventually get to a point where you will experience the joy of sexual freedom with each other."
Best paragraph of advice I ever read as far as advice to girls go. If you want to wait to push forward, make sure he doesn't think you're just throwing a brick wall in front of him. Otherwise, why should he want to stay?
I've been all three at one time or another. It really depends on the guy, what type of relationship I was pursuing at the time, and how comfortable I felt with him. I trust my instincts when deciding how to proceed; if he doesn't like it and he wants to judge or label me, that's his bag of chips.
Its not a double standard that easy women are looked down upon compared to men who sleeps around a lot. You already know this but it takes a lot more effort for a guy to get laid compared to a woman, and only a small percentage of men are attractive enough to sleep around as easily as the average woman can if she wants to. This is because women are more selective and dont have as high of a sex drive as men.