For Guys, How to Know If You're Handsome (Page 2)

[llcanon]

Really, this is so subjective, i am almost 65,- July 65. i know i don't look like i did when i was 22 and drawing the attention of many women. I am a confident man and still turn a head or two even at 65. it has more to do with personality and how a man carries himself as an example confidence shines through which always gets a woman's attention. I no longer has anything to prove at my age of 65 and i still draw women's attention and have no problem getting a date at a moments notice. i still have a full head of hair and very little gray and am mistaken for around 52 or 53. I don't look my age as i am told this by my younger dates. For some reason i am attracting the younger women at this age- no complaints from me. i have dated older women here since my wife passed away in 2019. Now i know why the wife kept a close tab on me.

[Majestical_Psyche]

What I've been learning, If you have good energy.
You're a lot more attractive and even approachable.

I think it really depends on the energy you carry,
Exp: An over weight person can get all the girls, while a muscular person not as much...
""""But again, It depends""""
But the energy and mindset you carry is huge!!!

[AlwaysBelieving]

#1. I don't notice. Hell, I don't even notice if they're flirting with me most of the time. Most of the time I have to be told that I'm being checked out.
#2. Most of the time I go "I'm just me."
#3. I get them... though they mostly come via my parents. Such as "so and so say you're handsome."
#4. Maybe back in high school
#5. Not that I can recall
#6 Applies

[The_Maphio]

Trying to be handsome requires effort to maybe be somebody or forcing a demeanor that doesn't belong to you. Just be yourself.
Some girls adore a goofball. And those who look for the macho are usually not all that interesting.

Live your life the way you are and you'll sooner or later stumble on a woman that clicks with you. I'm living proof of this theory being effective.

[Bellatris]

I don't accept number 2, "See for yourself", if only because we all can be our own worst critics when it comes to assessing what we see in the mirror. Besides, the image is inverted, so it's not even an accurate reflection of who we really are. It's better to ask other people.

[Jaumet]

For a guy, a male, someone with an XY chromosome to try and explain to me that I'm handsome... simply means that you pay a shit load more attention to boys than you ever have to girls. So, take your opinion of what you may try and judge my looks and shove it up your ass... where I'm sure it will feel arousing to you.

[Wanttowatch]

Throughout my life I have always been one of those pretty boys just as this article describes I have been called gay I have considered myself a bisexual I like male and female but just column pretty much describes everything perfectly as I am older now 63 I still get whistle that I love to wear very expensive cologne and that is a must for me it doesn’t matter to me as an adult but people say it used to bother me as a young man but I’m glad I’m a pretty boy and not a fat ugly old man at 63 years old that’s my take on this column have a good day

[Anonymous]

Doctor, doing what I love. Genetically blessed. Financially well off. Still can't find a single woman who can make me happy long term. This handsome shit can't get you everything and its depressing.

In any case if you're good looking, it seems like you get complimented a lot when you're younger. In my case I'm the youngest of 4 and there are plenty who said "Oh look you've added to your brood of handsome boys" As you get older, your hotness it solely talked about behind your back by your peers and never to your face. It's like they just assume you know you're handsome and you never have to be told. I mean I'm not being narcissistic but It's sometimes nice to hear it from a woman who has genuine feelings for you.

[DocT1977]

I define myself as being the man that doesn't really care anyway. I got a wife and I maintain. I wasn't even interested in dating when I met her. Before my self imposed dry spell, I failed miserably at reading the signs. I don't know what the hell women thought of me and it didn't really matter because I was focusing on other areas of my life at that time.

[Anonymous]

Well I look like a handsome man haha but I'm female loll

[The_Sal]

I get a lot of young girls meowing at me when they walk past me lol. like teenagers 🤣
I'm in my 30s but it's been happening since forever. it's fine when girls in their 20s do it but I don't know how to feel when a 15yo does it 😂 it's kinda weird bit I guess I guess my looks ain't fading yet so, yay! 😋

[Midhat]

I got a lot of these, so you're telling me I'm handsome?

[bumblebritches5]

You know I've always thought I was ugly and had really low self esteem because people either ignored me or gave me a ton of shit, but lately I've been noticing women staring at me for minutes at a time, or doing the glance and duck thing.

another one: Looking at you through your reflection in a window or display of some sort.

that one really cracks me up, cuz its like, bro i can feel you looking at me lol, you're not hiding it at all, even tho you think you are

[SenseiSeptred]

Even beyond being handsome, there is still the fact that a person with a very particularly rare piece of knowledge that they can disclose at any time that they feel like doing so can be absolutely intimidating beyond the looks of the said person will add that much more value to the person. I know this because I am one of those types of nerds even without wearing glasses or having gone to college. When you master your existence, nothing can stop you.

[Daniel3035]

This is pretty accurate not gonna lie for me number one happens a lot 90% of cases they look away. But I hate how they all expect me to just approach them.
Compliments as well.
And guys hating me for sure I had one guy who was scared I was stealing his girlfriend away.
With being gay I had girls also ask if I was gay... it was weird.

[Jamie05rhs]

What if I look at them first but then they stare at me?

Because that happens sometimes, and I'm like "F*ck. I wasn't expecting that to escalate so quickly. What do I do now?". So then I just look straight ahead (or look down) and ignore them.

[Jamie05rhs]

@AmandaYVR Any advice on this one? Lol

[AmandaYVR]

lololol. "Escalate."

Well, depends what the context is. I'm a bit like you, in that if I have no business being somewhere, I will default to leaving. And I never chase anybody. And I completely suck at small talk in person.
But the most basic, beginning stuff is eye contact. You've got two options with that - either look again, or look longer. If you're going to bump into her again, you can do the eye contact thing repeatedly over time and build up to conversation later. If you will never see her again, you've got to make the most of the situation and start talking.
Most girls are going to be cautious and prefer to observe the guy a fair bit before interacting.
I don't know what scenarios you are referring to. If it's business context, drag it out as much as possible. Fight your instinct to flee. Ask open-ended questions, something that's more than "how are you?" or "how's your day going?" Go for humour, or an observation, or what I find works most easily for me is to say something quite specific, about your mood, frame of mind, and be self-effacing. That disarms people, shows you're not full of yourself, and they can slowly begin to trust you.

[Jamie05rhs]

"If you will never see her again, you've got to make the most of the situation and start talking."
See, that's my problem. I don't care if I ever see her again or not. I think my heart has become calloused and icy. It's not that I don't care about the other person -- because I certainly can have strong feelings, even if she's a complete stranger who I've just seen for the first time ever in my entire life. It's just that I'm trying to protect my emotions.

"If it's a business context, drag it out as much as possible.". Eh, I don't know... I always try to make those as short and concise as I possibly can. I wouldn't want to get fired for making someone uncomfortable.

"Fight your instinct to flee.". LOL. That would be HARD, no matter what the situation!

Oh, I would never ask anyone "how's your day going?" anyway. I think that's way too intrusive.
(Though if someone asks it to me, I do appreciate the thought, but I struggle to come up with an answer. And I'm always skeptical, because I figure they're just asking that to be polite and they don't really actually care about me.)

"Go for humour, or an observation, or what I find works most easily for me is to say something quite specific, about your mood, frame of mind, and be self-effacing."
Can you give an example? And what do you mean by "self-effacing"?

@AmandaYVR

[AmandaYVR]

Jamie, you need to try and push through all these blockages. You won't meet people, otherwise.
I mean, to be realistic, girls are probably too nervous to get together with some guy in these brief interaction-type situations. But that's not to say it will never work, or that they have no value.
I know it's hard. I found it almost excruciating at times, myself. But it does get easier, I swear. I'm way, way more relaxed now. Of course I'm married, but my point is that I can speak to strangers way more easily now. I met a bunch of different neighbours last week, just by inviting them into the elevator with me (we are all wearing masks, but people are followig the 'ride up alone' mandate in the building. But it's been going on a year now. I think we can stand next to each other!

You should really practice on kids, the elderly, just making small talk and whatnot. And eye contact. You work your way up from there eventually.

It is not intrusive, Jamie. It's warm. That's it. Doesn't have to be anything more.
They're human, just like you. Don't think of them as potential dates or partners. It's too much pressure. Just chill, smile, say "hey."

I don't know. When people pm me here, I often say something very specific. Why be bland? We all know how basic intros work. I make a point of doing something different. I give people something to latch onto, if they want. "Oh my god, I just had the craziest/stupidest phone call with [someone.} Don't people just drive you crazy sometimes?" Everyone agrees with that. If you say how you don't like something or are going slightly bonkers, people will sympathize. It's not a burden on them, if it's a light, offhand comment.

[AmandaYVR]

I liked a guy once. He worked in a meat market I used to frequent. I was single. I passed by it sometimes on my way home walking from work. I bought small quantities.
I decided to ask him out, after interacting with him briefly, several times.
This was one of my bolder moves. (Apologies if you've heard this one before.)
"Hi. How are ya? I'd like two breasts please [pointing at the chicken]. And... would you like to come over for dinner?"
That was it. He was surprised, I think. A little hesitant. But he said yes. (We started a bit of a relationship, but his life was a mess... long story.)
As a guy, you can't get away with that. But I'm just saying, in a business context, it's not inappropriate. It's life.

[Jamie05rhs]

Okay. Thanks.

An yeah haha. You did tell me that one before.

[Jamie05rhs]

"And"

[YHL6965]

What if I get more attention from moms and mature women? I remember once, while visiting a museum, I got "that look" a lot from mainly moms and older women, looking mainly at my body. Now, it might not be out of attraction but it felt like it. It felt like a "I would not mind having a piece of that" look.

[wyldun]

my friends always drug me along when they wanted to pick up girls, said i made them look better to the girls

[Paul09]

Sounds about right. I have no clue if I'm handsome. Sometimes I think I am, but mostly I'm not sure. I rarely get stares or compliments, so I assume I'm not that good looking then. Or maybe I do get states, just do not notice it.. Well I'm single since forever, havnt fucked in forever.. So I base it on that. So much easier for women, that's for sure.

[Anonymous]

See for yourself? When I look in the mirror, what I see I do not like. I've caught girls staring and then quickly look away, and at one place where I work I was called "gay" - by a woman (I'm not, by the way). There was also the time a lesbian said I was attractive, and another woman of my approximate age who said she wished she looked like me. What does this all mean, if anything? Damned if I know.

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