Why do some guys complain about their girlfriends to single women?

[famouslyunknown]

Pretty much every day he tells me he's not appreciated at home when he is the sole provider, or that he got her flowers and she hated them or he got her a present and she was mad he spent money on it. Or like talking about how she is always complaining about being fat when she's really skinny and is so insecure and jealous. Then he compliments me like "you're so sweet and caring" "you have a beautiful smile" "you are too cute". Why do guys act like they obviously like you, put down their girlfriend, but stay with them? Why not just leave her and be with me? Does he expect me to try and hook up with him?

Updates

+1 y

Or do guys just typically vent like this to their friends who are girls? With everyone else he talks about cars and stuff and makes it seem like his relationship is good but to me he just talks about being unhappy. I don't know what to think.

[Lauren2410]

Lol, everyone here is saying he does that because he wants to get with you or cheat or hookup.
And I got freaking friendzoned , yet my crush complained to me and asked me for advice about his girlfriends without any intention to cheat on her with me or to hit on me. lol.
Point is, the most you can do is give him advice, but please, don't help him cheat.

[famouslyunknown]

Yeah this is why I'm confused about it because I used to be able to be more neutral about it but now that I know him better I'm actually starting to get pissed she treats him like that and wonder why he stays when he says I'm so great even though we are not like "that". I'm not going to help him cheat.

[Lauren2410]

Look, I got my hopes up with my crush even when he got into relationships, because whenever he fought with them, he called or texted me to complain. after that I realized
1. Even if he liked me, I wouldn't wanna be a part of his cheating
2. Even if he doesn't like me, why should I be his "spare" to go to and complain whenever he gets it wrong with his girl

I get it upsets you that she acts like that, but I don't get why he's complaining to you instead of communicating with her and solving the issue. Might as well break up with her if he doesn't do something about it.

[famouslyunknown]

Yeah I've told him that if he isn't happy then just move on he deserves better life is too short. I get the feeling he does like me though and wants to be sure I feel the same before he breaks it off. He is always around me and like I said it's like he showers me with heartfelt compliments and gazes at me like there have been times I thought he was going to kiss me mid conversation because he gets lost in my eyes. However, I don't want to be used if he really does just want to hook up so I keep my mouth shut about how I feel for him.

[why_not_anonymous]

2. Even if he doesn't like me, why should I be his "spare" to go to and complain whenever he gets it wrong with his girl

Heh, this is most guys who've been friendzoned.

[famouslyunknown]

I actually don't mind being his friend if he needs me. There are more important things than just trying to get it in. I am basically worshipped at work as the hottest woman in the building, any guy would die to get with me, including him, so I'm not friend zoned. I just wondered if he complains so I will make a move. Cuz i do want him more and more each day.

[SomethingWicked]

He only expects a hook up with you, the stuff about the girlfriend is lies so you'll feel emotionally involved.

[famouslyunknown]

So you don't think he's telling the truth at all?

[SomethingWicked]

No, some men, not all, are like that.

[pr3ttybr0wn]

because they are trying to get with you

[jointhepatriarchy]

I see a lot more women bitching about their boyfriends to their guy friends, then cheating on said boyfriend with their guy friends soon as their relationship hits some turbulence.

[yaddayaddayadda02]

Usually when a person is complaining to a single person about a partner, they're fishing for interest to cheat.

[kangy]

yes be careful

[famouslyunknown]

How long? because he's been saying this stuff for a few months now and I just try to give him advice to fix it or help him see it from her point of view. I really do like him when he's not talking about her and we are just laughing and talking about other things we have a lot in common. I just don't want to be a homewrecker and it's not like he really hits on me anyway I don't know if maybe he just sees me as a friend he can confide in and he just likes to give me compliments and presents and buy me lunch. Like that's what just friends do?

[yaddayaddayadda02]

If it's been a few months, then you're probably right, you're just his confidant. However, He should be addressing his relationship problems with her, not you.

[akadatank44]

Telling you in a way that he will be single very soon and he is trying to get with you.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like his stupid way of hitting on you.