Why do men lie about their intentions?

[Anonymous]

Is it really so hard to say you just want sex? Why even go through all the crap saying everything you think a woman wants to hear just to get laid?

So frustrated right now.

[btbc92]

Because it's the fastest way to get sex. Their #1 goal. They wouldn't be talking to you if they didn't want it. They just assume you just know what they're after. They will play the 'boyfriend' card just to get it. They don't want to be friends, even if it's your requirement. It's a rejection to sex. Period. If you have no desire to have sex and do any sexual activities for or with them, then your nothing. No matter how nice, sweet, kind of good you are. And if you're not interested in that, then your either too religious, asexual, a prude or have a low sex drive. Then when you get upset about the accusations then you're a B***. It really all depends on what are your intentions and believe's in. If you believe in premarital sex, then sadly they will look at you as being stupid. If you don't, you'll get shunned and or mocked. And if you find somebody who believes and thinks like you, you have to be careful. Some of them might have been crushed or damaged from past encounters or relationships. Overall, I agree with you. I can't stand phoneys and fake, either. I now question every guy that shows up. Nobody needs to be lead on. They don't need to be perverse about it, which is how they will get slapped. But they have to stop beating around the bush, the same way they don't like us doing it to them. They need to realize that either way if she is not interested, she is never going to 'mate' with you. Be genuine. That is all I tell men. If your not genuine and you just want a good screw, and you don't respect marriage, sex, etc. You can leave. You have to watch out for manwhores. Stick to genuine men who do want to get to know you and love you for you, and won't go after you because he just wants sex and his wiener needs to fix an itch.

[Unit1]

With the exception of premarital sex i agree with this.

[stoner101]

What is you talking about, do you know how boys struggle to finally get laid? You think its easy? If you don't lie you won't get laid ever. We are just dealing with the situation that YOU girls have made.

[btbc92]

Load of bull. Get married, not be a hoe because you can't or won't control your hormones. A woman don't owe you Jack squat. You owe it to yourself to decide what type of life is going to benefit you. You wanted to masturbate all the time and then blame women. Blame yourself. Be genuine or don't complain. Sex IS NOT a conquest. Your only making your own self miserable. Then when women say all you care about is sex, it's true. And you get offended. Know that a good amount of women don't like guys who think like you.

[stoner101]

Its so sad if you think i care about what people think especially GIRLS im being real if you think i masturbate maybe i did it in front of you, tryna come up with this essay full of bullshit... i know the situation and you do

[btbc92]

you don't you just think you do because that's all you care about is yourself. if all you care about is yourself and you make a poor lover. no you don't know the situation you're ignorant.

[btbc92]

all you going to bring to a person's relationship is hell. because you're selfish.

[stoner101]

Thats according to you and your mindset is evil, you think the shit you would do everyone would do too? Hell naw i care about my girl and you go give your man a memorable night... smh

[btbc92]

know your mindset is evil because you're telling me what you're telling me. and first will buddy I've been by myself all my life I don't have to be involved with anybody because I know better. but I guess you lie to your girl just so you can get something out of her since you said it yourself.

[btbc92]

you're the one that's coming on here to them about how you got a lot out of us how she going to finally get late so no you're the one that's telling me everything I need to know. and you call it love that's pathetic.

[btbc92]

at least I know to keep my legs closed and only share that kind of intimacy with a husband that only he is allowed to experience with. not play games and then when things don't work out one or both of you leave or cheat on each other. then you want to say how you fell out of love. those are the kind of games you people like to play.

[btbc92]

real love endures and they respect each other not use each other and lie.

[stoner101]

You think you know your husband so much huh, you gat cameras on his body or what... you chose to trust on your husband, we dont know much about him

[btbc92]

see in this is exactly why I said your mind said is evil. I am celibate and I'm not looking to get married or be involved with anybody. but I respect the person enough to know better than to be screwing around multiple men and then I can't even bother to love the person that I'm claiming opposed to be married to. love requires Trust. but I suppose these are things that you don't value too much. I can care less about a person's body I care about that person's heart. what all you care about is a good screw. I tell you now relationships like that don't last long. all fun games until party's over.

[stoner101]

You are evil so evil but i dont care just believe in what you do and thats it... enough i've gave you enough knowledge

[btbc92]

you ain't give me no knowledge you haven't even know barely for yourself yet. you want to know what's evil using each other and in call it love that's evil. you think having sex with multiple women is good. you don't even realize the kind of damage you're doing. but how can you know you're blind. she don't even tell me something about evil that's you you don't even see yourself.

[btbc92]

least I don't lie to people. that's what you doing since you want to that to me. don't blame me for something that you said out of your own mouth.

[btbc92]

that's why I avoid men like you when I tell him to go the other way. Don't Need No Man whores in my life. other woman wants to bother let them. They can't blame you when they themselves are the ones who dug their own grave. a woman needs a man not a child who wants to play the field. a woman cannot honor and respect a man if she cannot honor and respect herself. goes to show what you know which is nothing.

[stoner101]

Yea yea live forever and die with your man.. who cares damn!!

[btbc92]

are you even paying attention I just told you I am celibate. not abstinent. it means not having sexual relations or being involved with somebody in a romantic context. how can I be married if I'm a virgin? Let alone never dated? Pay attention.

[stoner101]

You think you're so smart

[btbc92]

smart enough not to get used by you men. glad I dodged a bullet.

[stoner101]

You're dumb you know.. how could i use you in here

[btbc92]

I'm not even going to answer that. Obviously your not paying attention.

[stoner101]

How could i actually waste my time and pay attention to you? You've Said enough shit i've heard enough. Go to sleep

[btbc92]

So are you replying back? Not so smart.

[mrcatkins]

I never lied just to get sex. I never wanted to have sex with someone I don't want a relationship with. Sex is nice, but when I don't find a woman attractive, I'm not going to tell her she is pretty, just to get laid. And besides, I do like to have a relationship. Don't think men only want sex and nothing more.

[little_bird1]

Because they are selfish cowards who would rather give a heartbreak then receive a few rejections.

[Nocrying5]

Bitter much.

[kevinterhune]

I just want sex

[Asad1ONE1]

Makes sense. They aren't selfish, just cowards. Fear can affect both men and women. It doesn't make us bad people. Just weak people.

[Asker]

@Asad1ONE1 It's selfish when you know you're actions will hurt the other person but you want what you want more.

[Asad1ONE1]

Yes anyone could be such. Not only men

[Anonymous]

A lot of times they don't really think through what they want.

[demonics]

We know you guys like D, we also know:

Tact: The ability to deal with embarrassing situations carefully and without doing or saying anything that will annoy or upset other people; careful consideration in dealing with others to avoid giving offense; the ability to say the right thing.

or more recently

Rape: A social theory that makes it okay to for SJW's to publicly humiliate those who are merely accused of rape, or men who have failed to use the proper language when speaking to women, no matter the facts of the sexual encounter/ interaction. Due process means nothing to the followers of Rape Culture and they are often not swayed by matters of fact and depend on emotion and hearsay to ruin the lives of men who may have slighted them in some manner.

Be angry at your feminist friends. We'd love to get to the point and skip all of the bs called 'dating.' Women have this weird thing where they're flattered or offended depending on the attractiveness of the male in question. I find women over say 30 want you to be blunt, women under 30 can be just as slutty but require the various hoop jumping first.

[Anonymous]

This is a story of too many men wanting casual sex and not enough women wanting it, so men start lying to get what they want. It's something of every generation. Not saying it's right, but it is what it is. Women typically only want sex when in a committed, romantic relationship, and men want to explore their sexuality. The intentions eventually even out in our late 20's to mid 30's though, desiring a more committed relationship, if that eases your mind.

[PoliceLivesMatter]

It's biology. The men anticipate not getting sex if they don't give the illusion of a caring and protecting mate. It's really the most rational thing a man can do to get sex. It's not morally good, it's deceptive for sure but it's rational. If he can anticipate getting sex by manipulation and lying, then wouldn't everyone essentially do that if they could get away with it? Most women wouldn't have sex with any man if they just said it straight up. The women usually want to get to know or trust the man beforehand. They usually want to establish an emotional bond beforehand.

[little_bird1]

It's not that women need an emotional bond for sex. The reason why we reject sex early is because we want a relationship and we want to be sure that you want one as well (it takes time to figure out if you're just bullshitting). And then there are girls who don't want a relationship and are cool with one night stands/fuckbuddies or whatever, they wouldn't reject you if you were flat on direct with your approach (if they find you attractive). So isn't it better and faster to just be honest and approach one girl after another in hope that one who wants just sex (and you will eventually) then to waste time lying and pretending to the girl who is obviously not looking for the same thing?

[PoliceLivesMatter]

Come on, you're not being 100% truthful there 😅. MOST girls DO want to establish an emotional connection. Even hookups are under the predisposition that this might turn out to be something. The emotional element is there. Why do you think guys lie? Because we know MOST, not all, girls want to establish an emotional line before having sex.

[little_bird1]

I've never met a girl like that. I know that if a girl is only looking for hookup, she won't have a need to establish an emotional connection. I myself only wanted a hookup few times in my life, and during that time I avoided connecting emotionally. These things happen fast; girl meets boy -> boy says he wants to fuck -> girls says she wants to fuck too - > they go to fuck -> the end of story. One night stands are best with no strings attached, even for us girls. The real problem here is that there aren't many girls who at the time only want a hookup. 90% of us want a relationship. Want to fall in love. Want sex with feelings. Want it to mean something. Feelings are an addition to sex, not a precondition.

[little_bird1]

And we end up hurt when we you lie to us that you had feelings when you didn't. It's like you having an amazing sex with the girl, she calls you a lion, moans, cums 10 times in a row and tells you it was the best sex of her life... only to find out later that she lied and FAKED it all. That you're a sweet guy but that she just isn't looking for 'a looser in bed' at the moment. But that she definitely enjoyed all the free meals, car rides, gifts and attention you gave to her. Hurts, doesn't it?

[PoliceLivesMatter]

Yeah, that would hurt but you even said it yourself that the majority of girls are looking for a relationship so if a guy wants sex with girl, he's 9/10 going to have to jump through loopholes to get it. It's cold but that happens to be the case even for hookups. I personally don't lie to women about my intentions, but what if some guy wanted to have sex with a specific woman and he doesn't know how she'll react to him just wanting sex? Safe way to play it would be to make sure she thinks you're into her and you care about her.

[PoliceLivesMatter]

Even hookups have SOME loopholes you have to cross. Albeit maybe not a lot, but they do exist. If not, those girls are quite trashy...

[Nocrying5]

Usually girls want you to play the game. They really want you to lie to them because the truth hurts their feelings too much. I can't tell a woman all you have a fat cat or you've got a great set of buns can I take you to a hotel and bang your hole. They want you to the pasta sweet they are and how pretty they are and then you have to go buy him a meal or take them somewhere to buy my gift she'll never return the favor for you. Rarely do you find women who just want to have sex when you walk up and ask him it's a very small number 2% percent Maybe. And then dealing with all the emotional crap you guys go out to get this thing started just to have a conversation we're trying to avoid all that

[drummer1984nh]

There has to be an easier way to meet like minded women for a casual/fwb situation. It's like I'm not looking for a mom for my son, I'm looking for phenomenal consistent sex. How do you find the women that understand the benefits of a friends with benefits. She comes over, she gets her fix, she goes feeling awesome and stress free. I get my exercise and we have a great time. But I want variety, so what's the right way to find and ask these like minded women? And where the F are they?

[Asker]

By being honest until you find one. and waiting, shoot. I have to wait to find someone, you can too. lol

[drummer1984nh]

Well that's what I'm doing, and it never seems to work. I get looks a lot in public, but that's as far as it goes usually. I can't seem to make things happen. I don't know which ones are dtf. So I don't bother most of the time. I don't want a serious relationship, it's not for me. I just want good bedroom fun with a girl I find attractive on the regular or semi-regular. I don't want to mislead anyone, but honesty just makes them flake in my experience.

[JSmuve]

Probably because if you tell a girl you just want them for sex, more often than not they're gonna be offended, question their value, wonder if they're even relationship material, think you're a pervert for wanting sex, think you're an asshole for not wanting to get to know them, and then conclude that they're unattractive and will die alone.

Seems like quite the hassle.

[Asker]

Wouldn't we question those same things after you get the sex and stop talking to us anyway?

[JSmuve]

Ya, but the key is all that happens *after* he gets what he's looking for, at which point he doesn't care.

[EXilerating]

If a male asks outright, it offends the woman. She thinks she looks easy, not special enough. Sex is Sex. Women also love the meaningless back and forth conversations, spices things up before serving. A guy just wants to hit the drive through and get food, not sit at Olive Garden staring at aged wine and cheese

[little_bird1]

It's because you ask in an offensive way. Most guys just come up and say 'Wanna suck my dick?' or 'how about we go to my place and have sex?' ', etc. How about you approach with 'Hey, so here's the thing: I think you are incredibly beautiful and I can't stop looking at you. So I decided to approach you, test my luck and even take some punches if what I'm about to say is offending. I am an honest man and I want to tell you from the bottom of my heart that right now there's nothing I want more then to make love to you. Would you consider my advances over drinks tonight?'.

[EXilerating]

@little_bird1 I like this answer. I am the nice guy who asks simple questions and its how they answer that tells me everything. Not what they are answering. We need more women approaching on the field as well. Great none brash answer, Thanks!

[Unit1]

Sorry. You got played and hurt. That's just what players do and what girls very often fall for.

Girls lie too you know? Oh yes, some of them really do. Dinner hungry sharks using men to finance her dinners.
Which is why I don't go out with them because I am decently selective about the women I would date.
You could learn from this and me and be selective about the men you date also.

[Asker]

It didn't get that far. I recognized what he was doing and told him hell no

[Unit1]

Well then. You're luckier than the other girls, who deliberately decide to ignore the red flags.

[AustinTXGuy]

Plain and simple, the guys that lie do it because it is more successful for them in getting their target girls in bed. Many women don't want to be perceived as "slutty" (which is a total double standard btw) and be open to casual sex, so guys will work the serious angle to get what they want. It's sad, but true.

[garroshsucks12]

I'm not sure, I'm actually not one of those guys. In fact my friends look at me in confusion and disappointment when I don't take the 'opportunity' to get laid. Only simply because I don't want it.

Honestly, I believe because if he tells you that he just wants sex, you're going to cut him off and call him names like a dog, fuck boy, etc. So he lies to get that feeling of 'being with someone' even though he just wants to get laid. It's really common nowadays.

[thisismadness]

If I want to have sex with a woman, she should be attractive to me, and not just in the looks department. If she's plain stupid, bitchy or something else, that turns me of, i wouldn't want to have sex with her. For me, not just the optical quirks are important, even when I'm just out for sex. ;)

[text3612379292]

I don't do that , I can be honest about my intentions, I am very truthful I don't try and mislead a girl I leave the topic of conversation up to the girl, but a lot of guys are not that way, they are insecure! If you wanna chat with me I'm down and %100 real and honest! I don't ask for nudes and all that I'm mature older guy and I know what a vagina looks like lol plenty of experience lol

[Crapulux]

You should wonder why you are attracting this type of guys and putting off the ones you'd really want to meet. Look into your friendzone for candidates.

[Asker]

I don't have a friend zone. I have women and gay males as friends

[madhatter1971]

Just be honest and direct. Nobody does that anymore which is nuts. Just ask the questions. It's really that simple be upfront and direct and don't get upset if you don't like the answer.

[Anonymous]

Same reason women do when they size up a man for what he works as, his education, property he owns and how much money he has lol. All's fair in love and war.

[Gustafsone12584]

I'd like to add something... It's not just sex I want, there's more to it, but that's what most guys want...

[winterfox10]

Because women will frequently lie about their intentions, so the guy plays the relationship close to the vest until he knows what she really wants.

[WalterRadio]

Because women want men to tell them what they want to hear.

[noesbueno]

I am honest and direct, i want a girlfriend for more than sex. I want a relationship where i can be able to have fun with, cuddle, and do all the things that people in relationships do.

[vittle1999]

If guys just said I want sex, 99% will be shut out within 5 secs.

[booshlinux]

I do get straight to the point when I want it. Other than that I don't push for it.

[Anonymous]

See this is what I hate about dating right now if a guy is straight forward and wants to date the girl he’ll he might even get called a pussy or soft but if he’s disrespectful or calls her a bitch or some other names she’s more accustomed to that so she will probably sleep with him