My boyfriend says he misses his freedom?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend says he misses his freedom. Like, going to bars hitting on girls etc. Which really offends me because I feel he's taking me for granted. I'm looking for husband material and I'm not sure he's it. He says he wants to marry me but I think he just says things to please me sometimes. I told him he has his freedom, go hit on all the girls you want, don't waste my time. He tells me to be patient but I want someone who is looking for a wife, not a fling. He has a flirtatious personality and drools over other women in front of me which makes me think he could cheat on me. Should I end things now before he does some serious damage or wait for him to grow up? What if this is his personality and he never changes?

[motownplayer2000]

Wow, we just had a question like this talking about pushing people to get married... Talk about irony... Haha umm... First, those are red flags, I have been with my girl for 5 years... And I don't have the desire too hit on other girls.. I will flirt, or what the kids say "be friendly" too them but that's as far as it goes. However, it's on you too your young, your 25... Are you working towards your career? Are you independent? Do you have a good job that will help with everything? How about him... My conclusive advise would be too, break up.. let him go. Tell him, if he wants his freedom here it is, because a relationship shouldn't feel like he is in a prison or trapped. If he feels that way, both of you are doing something wrong.. so yeah move on, and if he gets to the point where he's ready and you still like him... Try again... But for me I am not necessarily against marriage, but until they change some things in the legal system... Marriage is not the greatest idea for a man... So it would be best to part ways.

[jessture]

It sounds like you want a man on a leash, and he doesn't want to be on a leash. I don't blame him. You aren't going to change him, and if you needing to control a man is important to you, find someone else.

[Asker]

I have values? It doesn't mean you have to be on a leash to be monogamous and respect your girl...

[Hellobeautiful33]

What he's saying is: I need space I want you for marriage but I'm not ready to stop being young and flirty with other hot girls... he loves you but young guys usually have to "sow their seed" before they settle down. They like variety and once a guy is with a girl he obviously can't be banging other chicks and he doesn't do so because he has a obligation to her because he values love over one night stands. Young guys have a harder time doing this! Let him go and in 5 years after he's had his "time of penis" he'll be ready. Find an older guy. Just my input from personal experience although guys will never truly stop fantasizing other girls they eventually will find that love is better. Good luck!

[Imafreespirit]

He’s definitely not the right person for what you’re looking for. I think you should end this. The sooner, the better.

[Leafpool2]

He's not going to grow up just end it before you get more mad about it

[NucDylan]

That's really a tricky situation, because it can be seen as an early cheating warning light (cheating later, perhaps once married). He really should have his attention on you, flirting with you, and finding new ways to interest you, ESPECIALLY if he's honestly planning to marry you. If you can manage it, try get one of his friends to talk to him. So ask his friend to tell him that you asked them if your boyfriend really loves you or not. Then they can ask him what's up. That's all I can really think to get an honest answer if he tells you what you want to hear

[MrOracle]

This is NOT a guy looking for a wife and a marriage - this is a guy who hasn't put his single days behind him. Don't fool yourself about that - he ALREADY resents you, and that's going to get worse as time goes on.

in my opinion, you need to pull the plug on this immediately and start looking for a guy who actually wants what you want and is actually ready for it. This guy certainly is not.

[AndyGillard]

Im 28 and reading that disgusted me. He is clearly VERY immature and has bad morals, which is part of a person and won't change.

Even when i was 17 with my first love, i had no interest in other girls. Even ones that previously were extreamly attractive (and good in bed)

When you love someone and they love you back, it is the best feeling ever. Marriage needs love. It won't work ootherwis.

[heyyyyy69]

Well first off you both should have your own things you like to do. But if the"freedom" he wants is to hit on women I'd say he isn't husband material for you. He will end up just hurting you, I'm sure he's already talked to other women, judging by his actions and considering you only see him every couple of days. He doesn't really instill much confidence that he won't

[MythEsque]

If you honestly feel like he's not husband material or is taking you for granted, then you can break up and try someone else. Nothing ever goes right when you delay the inevitable. If you don't think he's the one, then you can end it.

[strykzone]

If he says he wants his freedom, give it to him. And go your own way. Clearly you two are notnon the same page, and you should be with someone who wants the same things you do so you can work towards them together. Just my opinion.

[englisc]

Yeah, if he's thinking like that he's still acting like a teenager full of racing hormones chasing every woman he sees. You're 25, of course you don't want to "be patient" and wait another few years for him to grow up.

[Cryostatic]

"My boyfriend says he misses his freedom. Like, going to bars hitting on girls etc."

So give it to him.

Doesn't sound like he wants to be in a relationship, period.

[Bklynoor]

Let him practice polygamy if he's the type that has higher sexual needs.. it's better you know of someone who shares instead of him banging other chicks behind your back & pretending to be loyal to you..

[SmoMan71]

If you are looking for husband material you should probably look somewhere else.

[TheQuest1981]

He's not ready. I would move on and find a man wants what you want. MrOracle put it very well.

[LazyMan]

Wouldn't be surprised if he was cheating to be honest.

[Anonymous]

Probably do not wait more than 2 months from now. If he does not change, end it, please. It is not healthy.

[Anonymous]

If you don't think he's husband material, then drop him like a bad habit...

[Ephemera1]

Yeah you should definitely end things now.

[Anonymous]

Move On, You Deserve Better