How are unconfident men supposed to get confident?

How are unconfident men supposed to get confident when being unconfident is seen as unattractive and people keep beating them when they're down? It's like a curse really

How are unconfident men supposed to get confident?
How are unconfident men supposed to get confident?

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  • To gain confidence you basically have to do whatever it is that scares you over and over again until it's no big deal. What is it that you lack confidence on?

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    • 7 d ago

      It's honestly everything except sex honestly weirdly enough

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    • 6 d ago

      No everything really, performing well at a job, trying something new, meeting new people, talking to women, driving new places, I don't know how I ever had a girlfriend

    • 6 d ago

      Ok, well like I said you have to do all of those things over and over again to get better at it. Confidence is really situational competence. The more you do something the better you get at it, the more confident you become. At first you're always going to lack confidence when trying anything you're not used to, but in the beginning you have to push yourself to do it anyway knowing that you'll benefit from it later.

      Performing well at your job - figure out ways to do better at it.
      Trying something new - try more new things. Realise that you're probably going to suck at it at first and that's fine.
      Meeting new people, talking to women - talk to more people. Figure out ways to start conversations, think of things to talk about etc. With women specifically, learn "game".
      Driving new places - drive to more new places

      Each time you do any of those things you'll realise that it's not so much of a big deal.

  • The same way you get good at anything else. By practice. Too many "unconfident" guys at GaG want a magic pill or something.

    You have to put in hard work.

    So practice. Get out, join social groups, force yourself to be socially active. And you can't use the excuse of you don't know anyone. There are internet meetup groups specifically created just for the purpose of teaching people to be more confident in social situations.

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  • By doing things that are out of your comfort zone. By challenging yourself. That's what helped me. Try a new sport. Try to engage more in conversations with people you don't know well

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  • Same one anyone gets confident:
    Set yourself realistic and doable goals that will take hard work and then acheive them. The more you do, the more REAL confidence you will have (unless it's some competitive thing... comptition actually wrecks your self-confidence by making you always compare yourself to everyone else.)

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  • Self-confidence is related to your appearance, with your attractiveness and your social skills. Guys who are short and less attractive can't do really much in those points, but they can at least improve their physics with training and proper diet as well as their mental horizon with knowledge.

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  • 7 d ago
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  • I know how it is. There's like this standard for men that they're tough, and can get through anything when honestly they can be in pain and be insecure like everyone else, and I'm sorry ment have to go through that.

    But always focusing on loving and forgiving yourself, confidence starts within yourself and your soul. Always have an open mind and be confident in your right decisions, and always be positive with everything that happens ❤

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  • there is really no way you can other than just accept yourself. of course, you can't trust women and PUAs on everything they say.

    if women were actually attracted to men with confidence then they sure as hell wouldn't be falling for bad boys and jerks that are flooded with nothing but insecurity.

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    • 6 d ago

      This is because a lot of women do not have the discernment to differentiate between confidence and arrogance.

    • 6 d ago

      @Truthatanycost very true! since their brain operates more on feelings and emotions over logic and common sense then this means they will always have a black and white perception on almost everything.

      let us not forget that what women are really attracted to are LOOKS, MONEY, and STATUS. and bad boys and jerks usually have status

  • It's the same thing as every company only wanting to hire experienced candidates for every position.

    "You need at LEAST 2 years experience before we just LET you start your first job, kid. Don't forget who's doing who a favor here. . ."

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    • 6 d ago

      Don't forget you must also have 5 years experience using that tech that came out 2 years ago.

    • 6 d ago

      @DDpsy Make sure you can pass a drug test. We wouldn't want you to be anything other than stone cold sober for this job that requires nothing but mindless repetition of small, tedious tasks. You need to have the laser focus of a fighter pilot to. . . stock shelves at night. . .

  • Confident men are often delusional about their own abilities. Remember it's more important that others have confidence in you. Be competent man who steps in and sorts out the confident mans mess.

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  • fake it untill you make it. also there's a way to build confidence. by setting yourself lots of small short term and some big long term goals with a set schedule with which to achieve them. with accomplishing those goals,. you litterally build your confidence like a stronghold, cause you learn to know what exactly you can do and what you can't.

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    • 5 d ago

      also start making it a habit to give validation to others. give compliments. actively look for what is great in others to compliment on it. this way you're less concerned about yourself and you'll have huge carisma in the eyes of others, cause to them it feels like you're delivering a lot of value to their life.

  • @asker Come to me my love...
    I can make you feel better😍

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  • I know how you feel when you fancy a wonderful woman & your mate always gets her cos your mind goes blank in her company & when you finally get a word out you stutter or miss pronounce it & go brite red get hot & sweat beat your self up stay honest be interested in her don't big your self up complement her you will get shot down but there will be that 1 who sees you & not your faults

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  • By pursuing your life goals and aspirations. The focus and work you put in will result in confidence, and understanding that no matter what happens you'll be fine.

    Oh, and it's #3 on what men need to get the ladies. Do you know what #1 and 2 are?

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  • Go to the gym, read more and get a hobie. You improve your body, your mind, you get out of your comfort zone and meet new people.

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  • Groom yourself. ...

    Dress nicely. ...

    Photoshop your self-image. ...

    Think positive. ...

    Kill negative thoughts. ...

    Get to know yourself. ...

    Act positive.
    From Google. 🖤

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  • Letting go of negative self talk. Look up cognitive behavioral therapy. It’s basically gaming your own mind.

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  • Improve yourself. More importantly realize that rejections are not the end of the world. I get rejected the vast majority of the time. I just ignore that and go on to the next.

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  • As someone with no confidence, it's not that bad. I'm not popular so people don't bother me or call me. Which is kinda nice bcs I do t really enjoy ppls company

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  • Hate yourself so much that you accidentally trigger a defense mechanism and develop a superiority complex

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  • It's just a lie a woman uses when she doesn't want to admit that she's rejecting you because she is shallow and a bad person

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  • By experiencing and advancing in life, overcoming failures, and reaching success. The things I’m most confident about myself today are some of the things that used to be my biggest insecurities. Seriously. When you’re faced with a problem in life and reach rock bottom because of it, and then climb your way back to the top overcoming it and kickings its ass, it will yield the utmost confidence. It shows you that you have control over your life and your life doesn’t have control over you. It’s one of the most empowering feelings you can ever come by in life. If you want to be confident and successful, you gotta live and breathe it. You have to be obsessed with it and do whatever it takes. After a while, success becomes addicting and therefore becomes who you are. Overcoming trials and tribulations is where real confidence comes from. So stop being a pussy and go conquer the damn world. Us men are at our best when we’re in this headspace and stay in it.

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  • I think that the female collective wants every man who is not a Chad to go away and die.

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  • by finding/creating success in some aspect of their lives.

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    • 7 d ago

      And if they can't find or create it?

    • 7 d ago

      If a 27 yo woman can lose her leg in a helicopter crash among other serious injuries while serving in Afghanistan can then mountain climb 5 of the highest mountains in the world and who is currently climbing her 6th, Mount Everest, then anyone can accomplish anything they set their minds to
      www.instagram.com/.../

  • Go to do the bloody gym and lift weights ( cardio won’t do the job)

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  • Dont listen to any of these girls how would they know how to be a man? Just play the be a man song from mulan.

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  • Act like a man and be strong and will come naturally.

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  • Knowledge is confidence.
    So now you tell me the answer to your question

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  • You can't. Darwinism is a selection process not a reform process.

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  • Stop being afraid of making mistake, messing up things, and stuff like that. Find or make yourself environment that will punish your mistakes reasonably and meaningfully, so you can learn what to correct. How much of an impact does it have on your life. Distinguishing important from trivial is a key for learning. You will consequencially learn some important things. Up will become competent about that. That's start. The more you know, more you are competent. The more competent you are, more confident you will feel. Environment is important. You need friends that will not protect you from falling down, but always be ready to pick you up so you can keep fighting your way out of problems. And one more important thing is to take it like a sport. Train, qualify, compete, lose, or win. Wining and losing doesn't make to much deference. Maybe next time will be better, maybe worse. Don't drop to low, don't fly to high, and with real commitment, time will be your ally.

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  • Have a dream , set a goal and achieve it. Achievement is where confidence is born.

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  • If wanna cofident you to things that scary and stop being unsure about yourself think good about you

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  • I don't know but it's a turn off

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  • Fake it until you make it.

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    • 5 d ago

      You can't really fake confidence. It will be pretty apparent that you're just putting up a facade, unless the person you're trying to impress is pretty dense.

  • Have money.

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  • Love yourself :)

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  • They should marry a sexy goat.

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  • No way. - By an ugly guy...

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  • Go to the gym, now.

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    • 7 d ago

      It's 1 am

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    • 6 d ago

      @Truthatanycost dude i train a lot

    • 6 d ago

      Yeah, your supposed to train! Get a good job! Stability! Then get a really hot chick! Gym is only step one silly

  • Get rich as much as you can

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  • there's no such thing as confident man. we all have our insecurities. just keep getting better at whatever you're good at and accept your flaws. your flaws control you because you take them seriously but as soon as you stop caring about them they'll lose their power. all those stuff about dressing fancily and hitting the gym won't make anyone confident. pompous maybe but not confident. those are the stuff that the so called confident guys do but acting like them won't make you confident.

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  • Drink, you'll notice confidence comes with a little liquid encouragment

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  • Take the long way: start by tackling the things that make you feel diffident. If you have poor self image, hire a stylist, get to the gym, see a motivational speaker, get your teeth fixed, whatever you think can help you. Start ticking away slowly at the things that have been holding you back to the point where they are non-issues. Understanding these and then acting on them can help you feel and be confident in your skin.

    Short way: fake it until you make it. Bottle up the insecurities, ignore the crippling fear, take a couple deep breaths and just do what scares you. Talk to people like you own the room. Approach women five minutes ago you thought you never would. Project that you're already the guys you admire for having confidence and run with it. First time you do it, it's going to be hard, but the more you put yourself into that mindset, the more it will be less about faking it and more about actually believing it and becoming that truly confident person.

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