Yes I cry more often than the average guy. And 9 times out of 10 I’ve lost respect for it. 10 times out of 10 I completely lost romantic respect for it.
I remember I had to meet up with my ex gd three weeks after we split. It was for business purposes. She agreed to finish up designing a website I needed. I kept it professional but at the very end I looked her in the eyes and said “I miss talking to you”. And my eyes watered up. That was the ONLY time I had ever cried in front of her in a one year relationship. Her responses “with EXES I don’t talk because it weird”. She then rubbed more salt in the wound by comparing me to her last ex boyfriend. I will never forget that. Ever.
So girls if you wonder by guys don’t cry, well you are one of the major reasons. Barring very special circumstances (Funerals, weddings, birth of child) you don’t respect men who do that. Period.
I hate to be near anyone at all if I feel like I might cry so I always walk off on my own to hide it because it makes me feel so pathetic. The only time I've cried in front of a girl was the night the love of my life told me she had never loved me and never would while also trying to subtly get with my friend. He realised I had disappeared and found me/ stayed with me so I wouldn't harm myself while she tried to justify herself so it looked like I was just an idiot. Would rather kill myself than ever see her face again. Yes men cry, I'm very depressed but I hold it together somehow most of the time but it's painful to be seen by anyone when I'm like that.
So, I used to cry a lot as a child and bit through my early teens. Although, now whenever a situation that I would think I would cry during I can never muster any tears. Even things that make me feel depressed like a death or constant harrassment aimed towards me. It's only something i can take with me, causing me to think about it when I'm alone basically all bottled up.
The only times I end up crying is when someone talks with me about my problems, instead its left to bottle up and keep me up at night.
it's a little of both.
Given the differences of mass & scale of the hormonal glands & the whole body to be affected, we're biologically hindered compared to women. Females produce 60% more prolactin (which is not only involved in milk-, but also tear-production). Also, testosterone (which men produce more of) further inhibits the our more-limited prolactin-supply's crying-enabling effects.
www.livescience.com/...tim-hunt-why-women-cry.html
Hence, we're biologically less prone to it. (And as the article suggests, triggers for crying between the sexes differ as well.)
And the few times we're at our biological limits, cultural-pressures & upbringing dictate the norms, escapes, work-arounds, etc. to be followed.
Yes, the only time though is when what I fear is likely or happening, like the numbers of people using Ashley Madison, possibly just for hook ups for those not in relationships but how many are? The internet is so easy to use and hide shit for someone who doesn't trust much it's scary thinking of those closest to you betraying you without you knowing or with, it's like at any point in time you could become a victim if they have those shallow thoughts everyone has... and as a guy we are obligated to do a lot of stuff so that makes the fear more intense, but only if we put years of effort into making it unlikely
I have done my fair share this year... I lost my father earlier this year, so there’s been some rough times in the last few months, but I’m generally pretty strong emotionally. I don’t just cry just to cry lol.
But also a good song will make me cry on occasion. Not usually because it’s sad, but more because it may just be an exceptionally beautiful song, or sometimes because it’s just THAT good. Like if I feel it’s really striking a deep chord with me, sometimes I get a little emotional.
Sometimes there’s just a lot of emotional potency in music. It’s like “spiritual” almost...
We're raised not to cry. "Crying is a sign of weakness" and "don't ever appear weak" is instilled in a lot of us from a very early age. But as others have said, sometimes things get to be too much and we break down. Usually not in front of people. I can count on one hand the number of times someone has seen me cry since I was probably 5. Society (or at least the American society I grew up in) expects us to be the rocks of relationships. Strong and steady. And rocks don't cry. But yeah, we definitely do, y'all just don't get to see it very often.
Girls are wired more to internalize a bad experience. That is to say, they make THEMSELVES miserable over something like a harsh comment. So they cry, get depressed, think the worst, self-harm etc. Guys generally externalize such things and do that which makes OTHERS miserable like fight, vandalize, act in revenge etc.
Of course there are many exceptions for both sexes. My current wish is to grow spiritually by allowing my heart to be broken by events that break God's heart. As a result I cry much more but for others.
I do, though at some point I was laughed at for doing so by my EX who had an idea of a strong male who doesn't display any emotions. Holding them is a matter of need, not a matter of will I suppose, at least in my case. I'm writing poetry which helps a lot in terms of venting, but if I feel like it, I will cry. Some women don't realize that guys are having emotions and feminine traits too, or to expand, not taking any initiative because the social norm is focused on a guy taking the move, which is a crap I believe, coz' you need a couple to dance though.
Personally speaking I think guys from my generation and prior were raised to be more reserved with our emotions. But this has its caveats too. I've cried at the end of a relationship or two. I can't watch Les Miserables without going to tears when Anne Hathaway sings. (Everytime! So beautiful.) But i also think there is a paradigm shift towards sensitivity with the younger generations. This generation gap thing is good. Emotions are not the enemy contrary to what many men believe. It's a depth of feeling thing. So maybe guys are just generally speaking more able to shrug to thinges off and don't emote quite as openly as females. Plus there is a social stigma. Stiff upper lip and all that. I can get away with it more than most because I'm artistic. But I don't because I frankly don't think many things are worth tears. Plus guys tend to emote with anger rather than tears. That's probly closer to the truth.
I think most guys are more private about it because it's really awkward. When my parents passed away I bawled like a baby, or when I split up with my wife, or thought my roommate was dead, or my daughter in law and wife contacted me again. More for bigger or more serious things.
1. Do you ever feel like crying?
Not really, seems pointless to me cause it's not solving the issue, witch I prefer to do, but every once in a great while, just happens without wanting it.
2. How do you guys keep it together?
I don't know about everyone else, but I just try to always keep a positive outlook, that and it's just in my nature not to lose composure.
3. Do you just not feel like crying?
Yeah, answer to the first question summed it up.
4. Or do you have a way of holding it in?
Yeah, in the few occasions I cry it's because there is no solution to the problem I'm facing, like mourning and all, and to hold it in I get angry sometimes, at myself, for not doing more and all.
5. Are guys just better at holding in their emotions?
In general, I believe so, but every bodies different with this sorta thing.
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