I think guys, men, should never cry, never get sad or depressed, those who do are weak, have no spine.

and I mean over anything, whether his girlfriend/wife died, his parents died, his pet died, or if he gets shot, stabbed, or severely injured in any way, a guy, or man should never cry or get sad, get depressed over anything, whether it is physical pain or emotional pain, what do you think? A guy, man, or male should never cry, should always be serious, never let anything get him down, and I mean literally anything. Girls, Women, would you view a guy, Man to be weak, a huge turn-off if he was sad and crying because his mom or dad died, his siblings or best friend died, his dog or cat died, or if he literally got shot, stabbed, physically hurt, he should just take it like a Man shouldn't he?
Updates:
what if he got murdered, shot to death like this?: should he just take it like a Man?

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or if he lost someone close to him and started crying like this?

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I think it's unfair but that's life, reality, society, culture, and women without a doubt have higher standards than men do

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Some men are like this but I think they call them heartless murderers. If you don't have a heart, you most likely don't care about others.

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    • Many people don't want you to care about them, and if you did, they'd just push you away.

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    • Yeah, but it only shows your insecurities and your fear of putting who you really are out there. If your such a man then why conform to what society says that you have to be? Why not be who you truly are. I don't cry easily, very rarely over a girl, but I'm not afraid of what society says, if I feel like shedding a teat I will. It's called evolution, I'm sure Neanderthals held in their emotion very well.

    • What he is saying is that a man shouldn't ever cry. Not from a death of a loved one, or even being injured himself. Native Americans thought a man who composed himself while being scalped was a brave soldier. They would eat his heart in honor to him.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Agreed, society expects us to be callous. Some girls say "it would be nice to hear what a guy feels" and stuff, but they're lying. If they knew, they'd immediately leave them for being wusses.

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    • Disagree, huh? Then why are mostly the guys who are completely callous or at least are unable to have negative emotions 24/7 the ones to have girlfriends? The moment you've got a problem, the girls flee. "I care as long as I don't have to do anything", haha.

      Whoever disagreed was most possibly not male. Girls have no idea about how harsh these expectations are regarding emotional suppression. Did I ever say it was good, healthy, or benefitcial? No. We just don't have a CHOICE.

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    • Whatever. That is so not true. I would be with a guy that cried and had problems, but there is a difference between guys that cry sometimes and guys that never stop. To any sex that would be a turn off.

    • Heh, I get so many disagreements.

      Could someone tell me why there is peer pressure and a lot of ridiculing by other children to force guys into not crying? It might be a bit over the edge to say "durr hurr girls hate guys who cry" but honestly? People really do look down on them as they're *TOLD* that is incorrect.

  • Real men cry and show emotions.

    Real men are not always serious.

    Real men are full of emotions, and anyone who bottles them up ends up with health problems.

    Act like a man?

    Yes acting like a man means crying, sharing emotions, going through sad times and good times and facing them with appropriate emotions.

    What you seem to be talking about is a robot and someone that could never be loving or real to a partner or children.

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    • Acting like a man means almost never crying and barely having emotions. That is a "man" of ideal.

      Why? Because by lacking emotions as a whole, you lack negative emotions as well - and that way you can always act not-sad not-depressed just overwhelmingly awesome and the same all the time.

    • bullsh*t

  • Please.. my boyfriend has cried to me twice already. He knows theirs no judgement and that I acknowledge and respect his feelings. life is rough. He shares his vulnerabilities with me so I can help him carry on. I don't mind it. Really it touches my heart to know that he trusts me so deeply as to cry in my arms. It means he does not fear me.Tears are a HUMAN response to letting go of pain.

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    • yeah well you girls expect guys to be dominant, strong, assertive all the time

  • I like it. Nothing worse than seeing emasculated men.

    I'm a pretty stoic man. I have emotions, people just never see them...although I can't recall ever crying...even when my grandma died (with whom I was very close with.)

    It's not like I make an effort to never cry. It just doesn't happen.

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    • yeah, women will always be testing us, us men, we don't test women

  • I don't really see how it makes a man better in any way to hide his feelings all the time. Every psychologist in the world will tell you that is unhealthy and leads to other problems. And who wants to be intimate with somebody who is totally unresponsive emotionally?

    Both men and women need to have some control over their emotions. It's not good if an adult of either gender cries in public over every little thing all the time.

    But taking any behavior or attitude to an absolute extreme is unhealthy and asking for trouble. It's also perverse. You feel that way for a reason; by suppressing it you are removing a valuable part of the human experience.

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    • Top answer to a terrible original statement. As a male I say more emotions please!

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    • there are literally more things that turn women off than there are things that turn men off

    • Mesonfielde, I was the same way once too, but I changed to be able to feel emotions again. You need someone that will be there to help you through it. Also, don't worry about the other people in the world. If they don't like the way you are, then they're missing out on knowing you.

      Asker, I can almost guarantee you that the list of turn-offs for women versus the list of turn-offs for men would be about the same. Also, crying is good for EVERYONE, no matter the gender. I don't think that the term "take it like a man" is meant as "become a robot that never feels sadness because that's not what a man does." In reality, most women like it when men can cry. I think that a man being able to cry is good because it shows that he's human and that he can feel emotions in the same way that I usually do. Sometimes I do turn off my emotional switch, but that's not the right way to handle things, no matter which gender you are. So, I agree with sarah-a180. That's just my opinion, of course.

  • Disagree. A man has every right to cry under those circumstances---- Love and loss is not a weakness, but a strength. Even if I see a guy cry out of happiness during an emotional time is a turn on, lol. It shows how much he cares about something, and in turn could care for me.

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  • why should you judge other people who are connected with their emotions more than you...have you ever seen me, myself and irene - I mean hilarious movie, but its true...if you just hold in all your emotions one day you'll flip...sometimes crying is the only medicine and if you can't understand that then I'm sorry...i just hope its not drugs you'd turn to over crying...

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    • well it's better to flip than be a wuss

    • being a "wuss" has nothing to do with crying...its people like you who turn otu to be serial killers and school shooters...seriously tho, I feel for you man, when your mother or father dies, it will be a shame to not shead a tear on their life...too bad, its really too bad for you, I'm glad I'm not in your life style...

  • what do I think? I think you're weird. women love it when a man shows his sensitive side. but they don't like it when they show it off to the whole world. if a guys parents died it's perfectly fine for him to cry and feel upset. that'd be taking it like a man. not crying because you think it'll make you weak? that's ridiculous and I really would not wanna be with a guy like that.

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  • I find those who are 'weak' are those who can't take care of their woman and abandon her. guys sometimes have silly thoughts of what it takes to be a 'man'.

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    • take care of her how? you feel you need to depend on us?

  • Everyone gets upset. One of the greatest traits my boyfriend has is his personality and the fact he's not shy to express how he's feeling. If he's depressed, upset, extremely happy, or laughing so hard he cry's it's okay. Trying to hide your emotions or bottling it in, or keeping it from people can cause problems. crying doesn't make you any less then a man. it show's a sensitive spot that most women like.

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  • no, I would not find it a turn off for a guy to cry...i wouldn't find it a turn on either, but it would show he has feelings, and isn't an empty cold hearted shell. I wouldn't want to be with a guy who hides his feelings.

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    • What if I just don't really have any feelings left? I can still be affectionate, but I'm unable to be sad.

      Is that a.. "turn off", for you?

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    • yeah because I've noticed that as girls get older, the higher their standards get

    • Actually, the older they get, the more reasonable their expectations become. In most cases, anyways.

  • Humans feel pain & have emotions. Not letting out your emotions in a healthy and safe way is very dangerous. To think that a guy should ALWAYS be strong and stay strong is a pipe dream. If a guy's parent(s) died, and he didn't cry, I would think he was one heartless and demented man.

    PRIMARY PSYCHOPATHS do not respond to punishment, apprehension, stress, or disapproval. They seem to be able to inhibit their antisocial impulses most of the time, not because of conscience, but because it suits their purpose at the time. Words do not seem to have the same meaning for them as they do for us. In fact, it's unclear if they even grasp the meaning of their own words, a condition that Cleckley called "semantic aphasia." They don't follow any life plan, and it seems as if they are incapable of experiencing any genuine emotion.

    (I was going to properly site the paragraph above, but I guess I can't, because I'm not a level 4.)

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    • bitch

    • I wasn't calling you a psychopath; I was giving an example of how I think not showing emotions is not healthy.

    • I don't often show my emotions either. You can't base a person not showing emotion on being psychotic. I get the sh*t kicked out of me by my dad if I show emotion. -.-

  • in my opinion if a guy doesn't cry, he's simply not a man, if he ant tell you how he really feels, he just hids it to look bigger its a weaker thing to do, a women would not reject a guy just because he cries when he is upset, itts just simply a wayn of showing feelings.

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  • I'm 27. Healthy, fit, and live a productive life. I love sports, love martial arts, and I like women. And I admit I cry. I'm not afraid to show my true emotions. I lost my father? I'd cry. Lost a girlfriend? I'd cry. Lost my mother? I'd cry. The point is, crying doesn't mean you're not masculine. It doesn't mean sh*t. Empathy is nothing to be ashamed of.

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  • Real men aren't afraid to cry because they know it doesn't make them wimpy, it makes them human.

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    • but it doesn't make them masculine

    • and not crying does? men were meant to cry, too. I suppose in your case your definition involves showing no emotion. but its easier to pretend you feel nothing than to face your emotions like a man and a human. this entire argument is a matter of opinion. is it really worth being "masculine" if virtually no other guys follow your opinion and girls don't exactly think its masculine either? I have never met a woman that wants to be with a man who won't trust enough to let down his guard and cry.

  • No. I would view him as cold. I don't think I could be with someone who couldn't show their softer side, especially to me, someone they trust and care for. That's something he shouldn't have to hide from me. The tougher someone seems to be, whether it be their persona or their appearance, the more I want to know there's a softer side in there. He can be as tough as he wants around other people, but I'm the one person, if no one else, that he should be able to be himself around. If you need to cry, then f.ucking cry, and I'll be there. I'm not going to tell people, I'm not going to laugh, or judge. I'm going to soothe and comfort because that's what I do, and I don't like seeing people I care about in pain. But out is better than in. I think it's bad to repress those emotions. Things usually feel better after a good cry.

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    • well that's why girls want the bad boy, asshole, jerks

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    • yeah well still he had to initiate everything, so there is no way possible he has social anxiety, he had to approach you first

    • LOL, I never said he initiated everything, you're making assumptions. We met at a mutual friend's house and BOTH showed an interest in each other, BOTH kept conversation going. He has horrible social anxiety around most people, he doesn't let people in. He's been on meds for it for most of his life. The fact that I showed interested in him was encouraging and helped him to feel comfortable with me. His entire family says that they've never seen him react to anyone the way he did to me, so soon.

  • Did you have a loving mother in your life? There's a good chance you didn't. Have you ever considered seeing a therapist?

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  • This rationale is bullsh*t.. Lotsa men that are considered 'real men' in that classical, old-school sense, do cry. They aren't afraid to show their true emotions.

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    • yeah but the girls end up losing attraction for them

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    • my boyfriend has cryed in front of me and it honestly made me MORE attracted to him not less. I felt special that he left me see that side of him.. sooo

    • Women want a man to have a heart... not to be some stoic stereotype... lots of yung guys fall for this tough guy crap, and they miss out on life...

  • I think it makes you weak if you don't cry or show emoshin

    it doesn't make you strong it shows that you don't care and you don't have a hart just because your parents aspeshaly your father says don't.cry or show emoshin when you are littel doesn't mean that when you grow up you can't show emoshin or cry most women want to know what you feel and think we don't want a robot for a boyfriend or husband we want a real man who feels and crys not fake crying but real crying and real feelings

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  • You're right about women having really high standards, but no woman has ever judged me for crying. I've dated a lot and I've heard from all of them that they appreciate and admire my ability to show my emotions. I also know a lot of girls that'll say showing your emotions makes you more of a man. Now I'm not saying go be a cry baby and cry over stubbing your toe, but I am saying that crying is a natural reaction to a body's emotion or feeling of pain, and if you don't do it, you're not healthy.

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  • As a woman, I can honestly say that a man crying is not as terrible as you make it sound. If someone he was close to dies, it's ok to cry. If someone he cares about is terribly hurt, it's ok to cry. If he's badly hurt, he can cry. Judging him as weak because he cried is completely unfair. Just because he is a man doesn't mean that he can't cry. So what if he cries, he's human. As HUMANS we are subject to getting upset and crying. Just because a man cries, it doesn't mean that he's weak. It means that something happened to make him cry. If you're saying that it's pathetic and makes a man weak to cry over REAL things that EVERYONE cries about, then you're a really insensitive jerk, in my opinion. Sorry for having to say that, but that's what I feel, just like you feel that men crying over anything makes them weak and that they have no spine when they have enough guts to show that they're feeling upset, even when insensitive jerks will judge them and say that they should "take it like a man." What does that even mean?

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  • I'll cry if I can't help myself. Sometimes my emotions are so low that I have to cry to feel better. And if a guy/girl has the nerve to come over and tell me to 'Stop crying, be a man", then guess what happens?

    They get punched and knocked out. THERE! Are you f*cking convinced now how 'MANLY' I am?

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  • So unless you have never cried or felt depressed (in other words, unless you are an emotional zombie) then this post is just completely hypocritical.

    I agree men need to be men and not be wimps, but God didn't give us tear ducts just to test our manliness (men should cry in private though)

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  • You have some serious issues if you think men should just "suck it up" when a tragedy occurs in their lives. Crying is natural for everyone, not just women. It IS a show of emotion and compassion, and for your information, girls tend to dislike the apathetic assholes who don't give other guys a bit of credit for crying - especially after a death or being physically hurt. "Taking it like a man" isn't sexist towards women - it's sexist toward men. Being a man doesn't mean you never cry.

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  • Men who cry have a bigger spine than guys who deny their emotions. And why do you feel that men should not cry? I think a man should cry when he wants to, as it shows who he is. We all die naked and alone - I don't cry about that as I'm connected with the world and those closest to me.

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  • Personally, I don't cry when I'm in pain. Got kicked somewhere that should only be treated delicately and my eyes were dry. As for emotions, I have cried when I was overwhelmed and in all honesty it has happened more than once.

    N offence, but if you feel I am less than masculine for doing that, please get someone to kick you in the trousers with the maximum force they can, and check to see if you cry.

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  • I like a man to be sensitive, not necesarily a baby but sensitive enough to be able to cry, feel happy or sad. Nothing wrong with it ! For me it is much better to share your feelings with the people you love, and if my man would not be willing to show his feelings to me, then I would be dissapointed very much.

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  • I would totally think a guy was weak if he cried when he stubbed his toe or lost at a game. I know guys who cry when they lose and I hate it, hate it, hate it! However in some cases they should cry. If a man never ever cries then I would say that, that makes him weak. Letting out feelings is not a sign of weakness, it's a sign of courage to cry in front of people even if they might think less of you. Real men Cry. That's just my opinion.

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  • haha lolol I love how the p**** ass bitch writing this sh*t goes up anonyymous f***in nigga has no balls... but yeah I mean I haven't ever cried from physical pain and last time I cried was because I viewed myself as a worthless pile of sh*t that nobody would ever care about but hey... you wanna show your a man come and run with tha wolves nigga f*** 2 dope boys snort some crack then hit a bitch with a gat... GOLF WANG!

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  • Your homework... ask a fellow 'man' with no emotion, feelings, just 'pure manlyness' to break your back with a golf club, paraylise you, condemn you to life in a wheelchair...

    See how well you cope, how 'not-depressed' you'll be, prove your manlyness!

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    • I will prevent myself from that happening

  • men or women, we are all human. we have feeling. And that's all

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    • well a real man is supposed to bottle up his emotions

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    • What? That's a stupid assumption. If you bottle up emotions enough, eventually they'll just disappear. You don't kill people only for the heck of it, you know. I for one usually cannot even get aggressive or angry anymore (among various other emotions) because I suppressed them for way too long.

      However, it's also a fact that I still am single. xD

    • psychological studies have shown that those who commit crimes, like rape and serial killers, are people that on the first view were calm, cold, emotionless, etc.. not saying all people with that criteria are serial killers or rapist but most of the rapist and certainly serial killers do match that criteria. there will eventually will be something that triggers it!

  • REALLY...A man cries make him a bigger man.

    MAN, just says it all.

    For a man to cry that I see, I give him much props, mad respect.

    Yes its a man, big deal. Move on.

    More respect comes in the long run.

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  • A "real" man can show his emotions without being a crybaby. If there is no emotion, it is hard to have a relationship with anyone. It is unhealthy to shut yourself off from the world.

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    • you put "real" man as if you don't believe there are REAL men out there who cry. A REAL MAN can cry/ be a cry baby in any situation...we all have certain things that hurt our hearts... So YES, a REAL MAN CAN show his emotions by crying... But, you're right on the second half...it is hard to build and maintain a relationship with someone who shows absolutely NO emotion.

  • god... if a guy whose mom and girlfriend died doesn't shed even a single tear for them then I would like to stay away from him.

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    • why?

    • well I don't want a weepy boyfriend . but I want a guy who has no qualms about showing his emotions... so in other words I need a human bf... and humans cry. crying doesn't mean you are weak..it shows that you cared enough

  • I think if a guy isn't afraid to cry around me its because he's sensitive and he trusts me <3

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    • being sensitive is for the weak

  • I will laugh my ass off when your son becomes a queen

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  • You might not feel the same if you had a wife/girlfriend who you honestly loved died. I like it when guys occasionally cry. It shows a bit of weakness that they aren't perfect which makes them perfect. My mom died 2 years ago. My dad, brother and I cried which is a liable reason to cry.

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  • Honestly, the first thing that came to mind when I read the question is that you are suffering from depression at the moment, and it's manifesting itself as outward aggression and hostility toward others. You're attempting to get people to validate what you feel towards yourself at the moment, so at least you might feel like your not alone.

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  • Men are gonna cry, be scared, feel weak, get sad and depressed, etc... NO WAY AROUND IT... I think what you're saying is that a Man should never show it. In any case it is a matter of opinion and I agree to a certain extent as to that it can be quite uncomfortable to observe a man in such a state(any living creature for that matter).

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  • Dude you got it wrong if a man is strong he shows his weekness, a week man hides his weeknes because he is week and doesn't want to be hurt any more or shamed. A strong man would show his weekness and wouldn't care what people think though cuzz its how he feels, it is stupid to say if one crys that he is any less of a man then the one next to him holding back the same feeling.

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  • I think it's perfectally fine for guys to cry. Thera absolutly NO weakness if guys cry. I think that's stupid if a guy doesn't cry because he thinks it weak or feminant. It's life everyone cries. Get over it.

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  • From age 3, I always thought Women and Men should be strong and not cry but in the privacy -of themselves. I still can't cry. I had no greater standard for men than I did for women... I'm older now. I think strength comes from what you do not what you feel.

    people who hold stuff in commit rape murder torture suicide. research it. .. its not good stuff.

    I don't believe in this I think its bs but any standard you hold for men should be held for women too- if its weak its weak. why be a hypocrite.

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    • bitch, ****

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    • LMAO you got trolled hard!

    • =) why.. thank you ^^

  • I like sensitive guys. It's like they care about life more.

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    • you may say that but you really don't

  • stupid. I don't even want to read the whole thing. its just stupid. a guy who shows his emotions is stronger than one who doesn't. it shows that he is confident, sincere and not a total cold-hearted ass unlike some people on this site.

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    • well that's why women want the bad boy, jerk, asshole for a boyfriend

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    • man I wish I could just hit you bitches without getting in trouble

  • it sounds like you are saying all men should be psychopaths :/

    I love a men who is strong enough to be himself and let his emotions show regardless of what people might say.

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  • That is bull sh*t men should have emotions like women, but men won't express them like women.

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  • this question is kinda messed up and I have no idea how to answer this.

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  • I thinks its OK for guys to show emotion and if someone they were close to died, its okay to cry...but just don't be overly emotional and sensative because then that's not ok...Men have hearts too, they're not made out of stone...Plus I think its kinda hott...

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  • I don't cry because I'm sad or weak, I cry because its an easy way to relieve stress. I can cry with a huge smile on my face and laughing. it just feels awesome!

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  • I am a sensitive individual though have not cried from physical pain since my preschool-days. I have cried though on every break-up whether I broke up with her or she broke up with me, and on the death of every family member and pet.

    girls don't look down on it either. I was on a first date with a girl and we saw the blindside and I cried when michael saved SJ. she saw me and then a few minutes later we hooked up.

    crying is not a sign of masculinity. It shows we are human

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