Why would a guy keep letting his eyes wander down your face to your breasts almost every time your eyes meet? can he just not help or what’s up?

[Solstraale]

[Obtuse]

What you wearing on the date? We are programmed this way... like, "Oh wait, look at face and contact eyes... what dat below... oh wait, look at face, make eye contact! Oh wait, what's the below... oh wait, look at face, make eye contact!"

You know, you girls mess up our whole programming thing if you are presenting cleavage and whatnot. I'm not blaming you! I'm blaming us. I don't know who to blame here. Maybe a God of some sort. Screw you God-person, why you program me to look at her breasts when she is talking about interesting things... then again I like how you programmed me to like her breasts when all she is talking about is boring things like shoes.

[Solstraale]

I never wear low cut I don’t like to show cleavage?

[Obtuse]

What you showing then? Cause a t-shirt still show breasts. You know, if I was surrounded by nuns I probably notice some breasts after a while. You guys need like full armor that makes you look fat in metal suits. I don't even think a Burka is sufficiently inadequate. You need like plate mail armor that makes you look like a round ball. Then maybe I can avoid looking at boobs on the date.

[Obtuse]

But you gotta sympathize with guy for a bit. He is trying to make eye contact. That shows effort. You just gotta default to the idea that he looks at your boobs. It's plus if he looks at your face.

[Solstraale]

I usually wear a t shirt or a sweater. But they are a little big and natural so they move when I do even in my bra and I can’t help it unless i walk in a very weird way

[Solstraale]

It’s nice that he looks me in the eyes but it makes me feel like he ‘only has eyes for my boobs’ when they always wander down and stop at the breasts

[Obtuse]

How does a girl's mind work here? Cause I think that's a bonus. Like if a girl kept looking at my crotch on a date, I think that's awesome. "I'm up here" -- that's awesome. But you know, it'll never happen. One time I thought it happened on a train with these girls in front of me looking at my crotch, then turning away, then looking away, and it was so obvious that I sort of thrust my crotch out into them... then when we arrived at our stop, I realized my pants were unzipped and my red underwear was bunched out.

[Solstraale]

Well I can’t speak for all woman kind but for me. I like a guy to find me beautiful and attractive but I’d like a guy to want to know me. To want to kiss me and hold my hand. Not only to see my body and sleep with me. I’m sure some women get a kick out of being a dirty fantasy but I’d prefer for a guy to just wonder what it would be like to kiss me and maybe even get butterflies in his stomach by the thought. Does it make sense?

[Obtuse]

Maybe he got all that on top of wanting to know you, to spend the rest of his life with you, to share raising children together, to kiss goodbyes when we go off to work, to feel the warmth of each other's hands in the wintery snow. You can't fault a man for having a caveman instinct. Boobs are a target for us. It doesn't mean we want more. It's far from guaranteed that we do, mind you, but I wouldn't use some eyes peeking there as a sign that they don't want more.

[Obtuse]

* It doesn't mean we [do not] want more.

[Solstraale]

You’re probably right it just feels so sexual. It would feel more emotional if he looked at my lips or I’d feel so at least

[Obtuse]

Fundamentally there is a sexual component to dating, no? Otherwise, why am I not dating guys? There is physical/biology things. You want to make sure you two connect beyond these things and you shift the topic, or he shifts the topic. You go on adventures together. You make a team. But he will probably always like your breats.

[Solstraale]

I just have an idea of the sexual nature steps a bit back if you’re interested in a girl beyond her body. Maybe I’m just being naive? But fantasizing about our first kiss is enough when really into a guy

[Obtuse]

Sometimes I found that happening on dates with the sexual nature taking a background. It's like I was so immersed in her face and what she was saying that I forgot the rest. But I remember one time with an ex where she wore this teal dress, and it wasn't so revealing, but it accentuated her body and skin tone so well that I was like, "Wha? Hubba bubba." Like I forgot the words to say. But I wanted her for much more than her body (I wanted to marry her but it turned into an LDR after we graduated and that fizzled out). But I was really distracted if that makes any sense.

I think with guys with a reasonable libido at least, that sexual component is not something you can divorce to determine who is really into you as a whole or just your body. You have to look for clues that they aren't just into your body, not the clues that they are.

[Solstraale]

That’s a really good advice thank you! Would you then mean it’s a good or bad thing if an otherwise outgoing and confident guy becomes self conscious and quiet around you but still smiles seek eye contact and then the boob thing?

[Obtuse]

I'm afraid that's too difficult for me to answer. It's difficult enough to figure myself out -- the subconscious motivations -- you know, let alone others'. But if I was a girl I'd look for signs that we get along well and have lots of fun outside the bedroom. I don't think guys fake their enjoyment that much past a first few dates.

[Obtuse]

If I venture a guess, I would think if a guy seemed really into you but turns shy in person is that he is on the good side of the spectrum... maybe from a distance he could entertain more abstract thoughts and ideas of being good to you, and spending time together... then up close the whole primitive caveman instinct took over and he was like, "Huh? What?" That's just my guess though. But I would be leaning towards the better side for a guy like that. He's more reliable to me than the one who just holds eye contact with you the whole time, like he's an expert at this, and makes you melt with his gaze... if you're cool with that kind of type. I'd lean towards "innocent" there.

[Solstraale]

Thanks for the perspective. I was more curious around weather I make him feel something and that causes the reaction? Cause we are still ‘just’ in the state where we steal a couple of glances and smile a little. He approached me once and asked me to look after something for a minute and grabbed my arm gently but he got a little fumble and dropped it before he handed it to me.

[Obtuse]

Well, you gotta explore in my opinion. It's not like he's trying to undress you in a bedroom just yet, not even close. So you explore. You have fun. We only get one life for these things. You have fun. And if he crosses lines, you say, "No, this is too soon, not yet", or even "fuck off". You control your fate. Until something is wrong, you don't need to think so far ahead... because doing so will deprive you of all potential company.

[wankiam]

it could be you misinterpreting whats happening here... quite often when humans establish direct eye contact the less confident amongst us look down... usually at feet to be fair which is what he might be doing but ofcourse its just as likely he is blatently enjoying the view... to determine which it is you may need to assess how confident or shy you think he is... i dont know him so i can't comment on that

[Solstraale]

I know where he’s looking and it ain’t his feet. He seems confident most of the time but he gets more quiet around me. Only me and there’s a lot of women in range?

[wankiam]

well i said it was one or the other didn't i? seems you hold the answer and he is indeed having a good look... now its up to you how you react to that

[Secret6620]

I hate this. But if I have them on display I can't even get mad because I stare at women's bodies too. 🤷😆✌️

[NicolaJ35]

It happens to us all
You're talking to a guy and notice his eyes go down

[NicolaJ35]

Thanks for MHO

[Anonymous]

It's hard to comment not knowing him or you or seeing the two of you together. It might be deliberate and intentional if he's wanting to sleep with you. Or, maybe it's not and he just has trouble looking away (if he finds you attractive and they are "on display" lol). But only he can answer this. It depends on the type of guy he is and his intentions, if any. But it's very possible no disrespect is intended on his part.

[Solstraale]

I never show cleavage but they are a little big and move when I do and I can’t help it. He’s usually a confident guy just not around me then he becomes quiet?

[Shamalien]

Bitch men like starin at titties we can barely control that shit UNDERSTAND THIS having this massive social stigma over starin at titties if fucked, its against our instincts, ain't nothin wrong with starin at sum titties. If y'all dont like it, wear looser clothing

[MrOracle]

He's a guy, right? How is this behavior any kind of a surprise or unusual?

Guys are drawn to boobs like steel is drawn to a magnet - and the steel doesn't get to decide if the magnet pulls it in - it just happens.

[ShadowofRegret]

Could be a variety of things, even something as simple as curiosity, much like when women look at a guy's pelvic area (I have seen them do that before,) sometimes people just can't help themselves, especially if your breasts are on the larger side.

[Robbam55]

Lol. No he can’t help it. I’ve been in that situation many times. You think don’t look down and next thing you know your looking down. Try and take it as a compliment. He obviously sees something he likes.

[Solstraale]

Do you get mad or annoyed at yourself then?

[Robbam55]

Lol. I’m just like you idiot.

[Solstraale]

? I dont understand?

[Robbam55]

I feel foolish

[Thatsamazing]

Why would a girl ask a dumb yawn question that's dumb and yawn? Can she just not help it or what's up?

[Solstraale]

You are lovely 👌

[Thatsamazing]

I try

[horsenrhinounicorn]

Lack of self control. He’s interested in your body rather than knowing you. Say eyes here please!

[whitehide]

Yes, he can control it, sunshine, but he probably wants you to notice that he's looking.

[Solstraale]

Why?

[whitehide]

He wants to fuck you

[Solstraale]

So he wants me to know he’d like to sleep with me?

[whitehide]

It's possible

[arun934]

Not on every meet. When its emotional it may happens.

[Solstraale]

Can you explain further? 🙂

[arun934]

If he's a booby enthusiast, then his eyes automatically turns to your breast. If he's a good guy, then he's feeling shy to look into your eyes , so he bends

[bklynbadboy1]

Well first off let me apologize for him and secondly I want you to take that as a compliment cause guy only do that if you have nice breast. 😋

[honestGUY45]

You're not getting any... nice try.

[bklynbadboy1]

Grow up your a grown man and that's all you have to say...

[honestGUY45]

It's not your responsibility to apologize for something you didn't do, and it doesn't matter if you want her to take it as a compliment, she can take it how she wants. You also can't say guys only do that if she has nice breasts, because you don't know. You're entire comment was disingenuous ass kissing. Then you top it off by displaying an emoji that looks like it's staring at her breasts, so all that shit was for nothing. Yeah, still not getting any.

[bklynbadboy1]

I dont have time your like a child looking for attention whatever I do has nothing to do with you obviously have to much time on you hands to troll around

[honestGUY45]

Of course you have time, you replied twice.

[bklynbadboy1]

Damn dude your still here... Go away! The sad thing is if you seen you you'd be scared to death but I get it everybodies a tough guy on the internet

[honestGUY45]

Actually what is sad is your grammar. I would swear your ass lives in another country by how stupid you sound in print. By the way you run your shit together, misspell words and type out of context, I could believe that you don't have time, but you keep replying so you have plenty of time. Let's see if we can't work on some of your sentences together. Ok, which one first? Your choice...

[tHISpLACEiSbONKERZ]

Can't help it, even when we try.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/vIWbyE1Af8Y

[KrakenAttackin]

I would fail that challenge, especially since the chick in the picture is dressed to show her tits so nicely.

[andy530]

Yeah probably can’t help it. You must be absolutely gorgeous

[Solstraale]

Are you being sarcastic?

[andy530]

Not at all!

[andy530]

As I read that my “not at all” even sounds sarcastic... sorry I don’t mean it to I’m trying to be very sincere.

[Solstraale]

Ok I believe you then

[KrakenAttackin]

News flash, men like breasts. If your breasts are sticking out we are going to look at them. Any guy who doesn't check out your body is probably queer AF.

[Anonymous]

does he do that when he's talking to other people or even men? Perhaps he just does that and isn't even looking at them

[honestGUY45]

You can either enjoy being beautiful or shut it down by wearing a sports bra and a polo shirt.

[prashant9643]

It's also what the girl is exposing. If a guy can be a dog, then a girl can be a bitch too.

[Margines]

Or maybe he is shy and You can't look into Your eyes for a long time...

[LiamSawyer]

He'd only do that if you have awesome breasts.

[Solstraale]

So I should take it as a compliment?

[LiamSawyer]

Possibly!

[EmmaMary]

He's just a very typical disrespectful guy.

[Margines]

It's not disrespectful , You don't know Why he really does this. We don't sit in people's minds , we don't know what they think. Each of Us is like "independent country "

[Browneye57]

He likes your tits. Duh.

[winterfox10]

He's just admiring the view

[Torari]

He can't control it. Tits are eye magnets.

[dthomas89]

Not sure

Don't care

[KrakenAttackin]

What is wrong with glancing at your breasts?

[Jmmmfi4]

Because guys like boobs

[boggboss]

Has bad self control

[Kelly6]

Boobs are attention