Why are modern men so unromantic?

Question

glutton4punishment · Accepted Answer

Because modern women, don't appreciate it.

Ever since playas (women included) turned sex into a spectator sport, people just assume anyone willing to go the extra mile for them.. must be after something. In the woman's case, sex being that most likely "something". Money, being the most likely motivation, if she were to pull out all the stops.

As with any sport... the goal is to win!

Getting down her pants, being the man's way of racking up points. Her's is to create the illusion of being someone the other could envision nestled nicely, into that always vacant.. "perfect", slot.

Located somewhere between gold digger, cock tease, goody-goody, like-mom, slut, (perfect), kinky-slut, bitch, whore and your ex. Not neccessarily in that order, of course.. so you're just gonna have to study the game film like the rest of us, to figure out that one!

That's assuming neither of you were fresh outta training camp, of course. Cause those types usually have to warm the bench a while, before some cruel twist of fate, allowed for their numbers to finally get called. Where they'll be immediately thrown into the fire, no matter how inexperienced or rusty. Doin their best to keep their cards close to the vest, when doing the whole Q&A dance of death.

Innitiated, only as a means of getting to know their competition. Not to be confused with getting to know the person themself, mind you but how they fit into the power-rankings of this year's draft class. Used as a means of deciding whether or not they warranted a spot, on the roster of their fantasy team. Those stats being based on comparisons to their ex's mostly, body language, areas of interest, cell phone snooping, innapropriate questions for or about their friends and family, etc.

Done properly, it then allows them to easily spot any chinks in the armor. Which of course, will then be used against that person, at an indeterminate time. So long as doing so, will then hurt that person as much as humanly possible... I mean, obviously?

As it's a time honored tradition, when playing in one of them big Dating (toilet) Bowl games! I can't tell ya how many times I've seen the competition just crushed and left in shambles, after getting caught off gaurd with a huge personal hit, like that!

Course, if you've been paying any attention, that's cause no one cares enough (to) remember it! Lol, including the one destined for the Hall of Shame, responsible for that playa's early retirement.. when deciding to kill themself, because of it!

Lol, good stuff.. good stuff..

It's their own fault, really... shoulda got childish notions, such as that "romantic" crap, outta their systems back in high school. Probably sooner, if nauseating shows, such as 16 and pregnant, are any indication! Pretty soon, dating games will have reached even the remotest of sandboxes, world wide... there's a lot of bloood, sweat and tears to come people, stay tuned!

So if you're single and expecting someone to treat you to a "romantic" evening out on the town... hahahah... go warm the bench rookie! As you've (clearly) yet to complete your training.

.. better luck next season, though!

Tonydalyrical94 · Accepted Answer

Modern men are romantic but the game of romance is already a challenge, if a man doesn't try to impress you "he's not trying hard enough" if a guy is "cocky" he's trying too hard and because women are unpredictable and most are entitled to their opinions the way to approach a woman ends in a few ways : unwanted male pressense, meal ticket to get out of something, selfish agenda, or insecurities of judgment from peers if accepted, slight chance of being accepted but even then that bar is low for men

btbc92 · Accepted Answer

Simple. Free access to pornography and sex from women. Most people nowadats have sex without dating, marriage or even before there is a 1st date. Some wven have sex right on the 1st date. Most of the Godly standards are gone, many don't adhere to God's word or believe in God anymore. Traditional roles, and aspects and ways of living is soon to be obsolete. Many sadly already dabble into sexual activities as young as eight years old. So why do they have to put the effort?

In the sense a lot of women are also put off by it. But sadly that's usually from Desperate guys who not only don't know their worth but at the same time they're very pushy. And it can sadly put off the wrong woman, but also scare off the right women. So a lot of men don't know what to do besides the majority already screwing around being manwhores. However, it doesn't help that a lot of women of cheating and doing the same thing. So while there is tons of hypocrisy the issue is that there is a lack of morals, good parenting and upbringing, stable, and lack of understanding besides the knowledge and wisdom. I also believe what the real problem is is that a lot of people that they consider being romantic is not really realistic. Plus a lot of men and a few women find it boring. They would rather hop into getting into sex instead of pretending like they don't want sex. However. It's for those reasons when things get too sexual too fast and for one reason and doing it wrong besides perversely. Is why a lot of people are now philophobic. It's not even love to begin with it just sex. What people call dating today is not dating. It's not even close to courting just know that much.

Almost reason why I'm glad I stood out of it because I'm not getting myself hurt further by those types of crazy guys. People today regardless of your male or female is too selfish in a lot of them don't even know what it means that relationship and many of them forsake innocence nowadays. Unless you really fine an individual that shares your values you just basically wasting your time in this world.

kaylaS91 · Accepted Answer

A lot of the things commonly seen as 'romantic' (buying bouquets of roses, paying for the whole meal when you go out to eat, and just generally doting on your girlfriend like a child) come from a time when women basically had not many more rights than a child- no right to an income of their own, no right to own property, no right to vote, etc.. So it was kind of fitting that suitors would dote on them.

Women nowadays have come a long way towards equality and with a higher percentage of women completing post-secondary studies, as well as the ability to work and make money on their own... something's gotta give.

You can't expect to be treated as an equal, yet expect only one partner (the male) in the relationship to dote on you on a regular basis.

hellionthesagereborn · Answer

Well why should they be romantic? Romance is a man whooing a woman, showing he can be a provider and protector and that he finds her to be a desirable mate (beyond sex). Now women say they are equal to men so why would a man romance a woman under those conditions (she can do it herself she doesn't need him), why would he treat a woman as special who has given away herself multiple times to multiple men who more then likely had to do very little to get her (not very fair to him)? Why would he show her she is a desirable mate if he is giving what he has and she is giving him. . . nothing, at least nothing more then sex (if she feels like it)?

The fact is feminism and women have created a culture that doesn't appreciate romance (because she is not a prize to be won because she is a "independent woman" who can take care of herself (doesn't need him) can provider for herself (doesn't need him) and can do anything he can do (why would she get preferential treatment then?) and is a "modern" woman i. e. she is casual with sex, a prize that once was hard to acquire and now very easily is acquired (so why put in that much effort into it), and who find the idea of being submissive, nurturing, and feminine as being weak and also sees her doing the traditional female roles and expectations as being sexist oppression (yet for some reason here you and many women are demanding men do their traditional gender roles).

Basically your either in a modern relationship in which case romance is gone and dead and you killed it because after all it was just a tool of the patriarchy and sexism, it was oppression and good riddance, OR your a traditional woman in which case you absolutely deserve to be romanced because your full filling all of your gender role expectations and he should be required to do the same. Its one or the other and the problem is women have chosen this modern relationship and thus they are not entitled to nor should expect traditional behaviors and customs to apply.

So this is the primary reason for it, their is no longer value in the exchange for men so they don't do it and women are so casual with everything they are simply far to cheap to spend that much resources and time on now a days.

Kaazsz · Answer

Girls I’ve been with, and girls I’ve only chatted with about relationships and sex, have always told me I am very romantic. But I am not romantic in the sense that girls seem to think about it, until they hear me say how I feel and how I act.

It seems to me that most girls think of romanticism as being, buying flowers, remembering her birthday, doing special things for her designed just for her to make her happy. Basically, the guy is supposed to do something special for her “because he loves her.” This must be some evolutionary shit I don’t know. I don’t know why women expect to have flowers bought for them.

Anyways, for me it’s different. I show my affection and love physically. And I’ve never had a girl complain about it. I don’t buy gifts and bring you flowers. I don’t give a fuck what day your birthday is. By standard definition I am the opposite of romantic.

But in real life, in my actual display of love and affection, the girl I’m with always says I am super romantic. It’s all physical and I don’t know how to explain it to be honest.

If most men are not romantic in the sense of buying flowers, maybe part of the reason is equality? Society values equality. I don’t know that men believe that we should be the one who displays these grand gestures while the woman sits back and does nothing. That’s not our culture anymore.

Other than that I don’t know. I know that other dudes are not like me. For whatever reason, Girls I’ve been with or girls I’ve talked to in depth or had relationships such as friendship tell me I’m super sweet and super hopelessly romantic even though I am the opposite of the flowers and candy kind of romantic.

I just like to express my affection. I love to hold hands, I love kissing, I love cuddling. I love to grab her up at random times into a big hug or grab her face with my hands and “force” her to kiss me. I love to look into her eyes and enjoy her beauty before I tear her clothes off and fuck her brains out. To me that is romance. Just expressing how I feel and being real about it. To me, flowers and candy and grand gestures are bullshit. You do those things so that the girl will let you fuck her. Not because you want to do them. I don’t do them at all. My girl fucks me because I show her I love her for real, not because I tailor make these stupid gestures to guarantee her legs open for me.

Investigator · Answer

"Why are modern men so unromantic?"

In relation to what and how? A specific decade or some Disney movie you saw that ended with "Happily Ever After"?

To ask "why" assumes that A) men of years past were romantic (an assertion not yet supported by evidence) and B) "romance" is an inherent good that has been lost in years since whenever it was supposed to be a thing and not merely what worked for men at that time (also an assertion). On what basis do you claim either of these premises to be true?

If I were to make a guess, I would say that "romance" was simply a logistical compromise: flowers and chocolate, music, slow dancing--all things people now call "romantic gestures" were probably buffer activities to make courtship seem more "free" and less restrictive back when, and have since been "romanticized" by propaganda as "those nostalgic things to look forward to", the same way "Diamonds are a woman's best friend" was merely advertising by the DeBeers mining corporation to make their inventory seem more valuable when in fact diamonds are super abundant but are increased in value through artificial scarcity. Additionally, the idea of "romance" shifts the modus operandi from "sex" (which is what people want) to "marriage" (a means to an end), if modern dating and relationships are any indication.

Why are fewer men avoiding marriage or being unromantic? Because they don't need to. If the goal of marriage to facilitate sex (which is NOT guaranteed) and men aren't getting it that way, then they'll forgo marriage and pursue other avenues. However, not all men have this option: for men who aren't as physically-gifted and naturally attractive to women, marriage can end up being the only option they have, because casual sex is simply out of the question, for a variety of reasons. So they have to go the "romance" route because it's either "dance the dance" or don't participate in the sexual marketplace. I imagine a lot of men are resentful of their superiors who can sleep around, because the guy who gets casual sex all the time doesn't need to try as hard but the married guy does.My two cents. Agree or not?

kemo56 · Answer

Well sweetheart I think you can thank women's whip for that I don't know for sure but I think it's gotten to the point where a boy is afraid to show his romance now maybe you're talking about after you've already been attached to him but you know romance is something you practice if you can't flirt and be yourself around women then when you're one on one you're not in the habit of flirting or being romantic and you just enjoy the ride I guess but you're in control of that girl don't you know you're the one with all the power he isn't romantic he doesn't get as much satisfaction the way he would like it when he is romantic he gets rewarded within a few weeks he'll be obeying you he'll be romantic I mean you might have to point out thoughts or maybe isn't that romantic what that guy just said to that woman or did no sometimes we need hints sometimes we think things are going just great and you're sitting over the one why hasn't he hugging me why isn't he cuddling with me why isn't he kissing me why isn't he holding my hand why doesn't he hug me and slowly go into making out instead of just jumping on me talk to him teaching training giving rewards when he does good not so much when he doesn't... Now these young guys are going to give me hate letters probably but you do you have all the power you can manipulate a guy in a good way just using the reward technique

kikino · Answer

My take-
Males are generally thought to be nice to females of any age because that is what is expected of men. You open/hold doors open, compliment a female on there outfit, hair, looks, etc., offer the carry, move, hold, lift items (not because we think they are inferior, weak, slow, etc.,) because thats how we were raised and if we a caught, heard about not doing said things then we are in trouble by our parents, grandparents, guardians, etc..
We are doing this not to flirt or hit on females but its just an 'unspoken guideline/rule' that you follow.

So when you help people out and they are rude you slowly become desensitized and loose interest. So when we want/try to be romantic it may be misinterpreted as unromantic. And our romantic actions my not be over the top due not wanting to come off as clingy, possessive, or creepy.
Think about middle/high school and how cruel kids are.
Yes kids can heal but it takes examples and time and effort with both parties.
As an example when you get a female flowers and she says she doesn't like flowers so next time you get her a teddy bear with coffee for her coffee make. And she get mad because you didn't get her pretty flowers like her friends received. So now you again give flowers and she's mad because your killing pretty flowers.
What do we do?

Its not a full, whole or short answer/opinion but just experience's I have seen/been in.

caring__1 · Answer

Romance has been turned into an obligation, and everyone is resistant to obligations, even if we put those obligations on ourselves. We're much more motivated to do things when it is totally our choice and our actions are appreciated. If you want to see more romance, acknowledge and appreciate the little things he does, rather than implying he's never good enough.

If you want a romantic partner, never demand or criticize. Acknowledge what is important to your partner rather than focus on any sense of entitlement (2 givers are more functional than a giver and a taker). Teach him what works for you and what you appreciate, but keep it realistic and within his means. The more you show appreciation for small things, the more things he'll do. If you only show appreciation for big things, he'll stop doing anything. Guys are highly reluctant to do things if they fear they won't measure up or will be criticized. Understand that criticism is based on the definition of the receiver, not the sender. Never deny what your partner is feeling. I'm sure you wouldn't want to be minimized in that manner, either.

Heiniken · Answer

Feminism killed it. Women claim that they can be independent and dont need men. On top of that the game is so rigged against men that it simply isn't worth playing.

Marriage - 25k, divorce - 125k, child support - 5k per year per kid for 20 years (100k per kid) - oh and you women get to use the child as a weapon in divorces and hold out visitation rights if we dont cough up the cash.. That adds up to 225k (for one kid) for say an 8 year marriage, or ~30k per year.

Get a hooker twice a month ($500)*12months/year ~6k per year, hassle free sex with none of thenegatives that come from a relationship/dating. Sure risks of STDs but with how many women are sleeping around many of you likely have STDs and don't even know it because you aren't smart enough to get tested.

6k per year for sex with many different hot beautiful young women vs. 30k per year for a failed marriage and divorce with a women who doesn't bring anything to the table or is willing to stick through the tough times? Its an easy f*cking decision when you do the math.

MCheetah · Answer

Because modern women have become so picky, entitled, shallow, conceited, arrogant, obnoxious, and worthless as partners. (She can't cook, clean, take care of herself, show value to a man, and expects it acceptable to see other people "in an open relationship," but expects someone else to "have their sh*t together" and shower her with affection and value). GTF outta here!

I think we all know, of the two sexes, men value women waaaaaay more than women ever value men. So the fact that MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way; usually-divorced, middle-aged men choosing to swear off relationships forever) is even a thing, kinda proves that it's not just men dropping the ball in relationships.

Hell, at the risk of sounding biased, I'd blame women for 60-70% of the reason relationships and dating are such utter sh*t nowadays. The other 30-40% are on all the cucks, incel men, and male-feminist/Nice Guys of the world. OnlyFans and Twitch thots being a thing kinda also proves the point it's not fully women ruining relationships nowadays. And yeah, sure, some men are pervy slimeballs or legitimate misogynists, but more women seem to be entitled divas who think their pussy entitles them to a six figure, six-foot+ man, more than anything else.

Reaperbot666 · Answer

In western culture the feminist movement as been going on since the 1850's. over the generations children (boys) have been indoctrinated by public schools, collages and media. to believe that most or all traditional and masculine male behavior is toxic. however it wasn't until roughly the 1960's when it went main stream. so western culture men are less likely to be romantic in the modern age.  in other words ladies the far leftists cause this whole issue. also since many children are now rise in single parent households. they don't grow up watching their parental figures interact in a positive manner. while being good role models for them as to how a couple and family unit traditionally acts. many also have what are called "snowplow parents" that remove any real challenges from their life. trying them into "snowflakes" as they got older. where they believe everything should be just giving to them. without any real work or effort applied to make themselves better. plus the participation trophies also ruins many children in the long run. modern hookup and one night stand culture as also ruined many of them. because they can just get their quick fix of sex in many cases. without having to develop long term or lasting relationships.

dragoblack · Answer

Because every time we try we are ghosted, told we are being creepy, or that they feel uncomfortable and with the shift in idealisms when pertaining of how men should treat women, most of us don't know what is ok and what isn't to do or say.
I personally find wanting to get to know someone is a romantic gesture, understand what interests make their eyes glisten with excitement and offinging to join them in that. From my experience many women tend to find it creepy for being interested in getting to know them because I'm not being agressive or offering materialistic gifts.
Aside from shifts in male thought pattern, females have also shifted in thoughts of how romance should be and trying to only reap the benefits of dating and romance.
We don't want to be used and taken advantage of, we just want intimacy and someone who cares about us romantically.
Romance and a relationship should be like best friends that really care about each other with romantic benefits but so many go into it for sex, material goods, free food, and so on which is why even if 2 people get together, it has a high chance of not working out

SjE78 · Answer

most of us are romantic, i know myself and those i know are... we have always made the most romantic gestures and done what we could for each of our girlfriend's in the most romantic ways... from flowers and chocolates to going out of our way and doing something big and meaningful...

hell i've treated each of my past girlfriend's with romance, even one that wasn't initially interested in the romantic stuff cos of her never experiencing it before...

flowers to candle lit meals for two, and relaxing infront of an open fire on a fur rug... to many more...

MrOracle · Answer

Women are the "choosers", and women stopped prioritizing romantic men and instead either chose men who were hot looking or who had money. Romantic guys were often ignored and sometimes belittled (unless they were ALSO hot and/or rich), so men got the message that romance was no longer a priority with women - and romance has ALWAYS been mostly a benefit for women. So, if women didn't care, why should men?

Obviously, there are exceptions - women who care about romance - but you can simply observe the women around you - particularly the ones who tend to be single a lot - that they aren't looking for romantic men, but rather have other priorities.

Novacane · Answer

There is a saying "Romance is dead, and women killed it"

Nowadays it is hard to be romantic, not many people appreciate it anymore, and people who try are considered a hopeless romantic. That's why many men don't want to be romantic. Don't get me wrong there are some people who are romantic to their significant other but that's only once they are already together. Nowadays people who are romantic are seen as a simp by ladies, also let's not forget that most women always choose the guy that doesn't treat them romantically. It has been proven that women go for guys that treat them like shit. Most guys are realizing this so nowadays nobody wants to try anymore.

Just21 · Answer

Honestly just like Steve Harvey once said it’s us women who set the bar for men. If we allow the bare minimum and give them everything for just the bare minimum, why would they put in more effort to please you. Men nowadays don’t know how to respect and appreciate a woman. It’s just very sad..

hahahmm · Answer

Because most modern women don't deserve romance. Men are not obligated to give you anything. Each year women give LESS but expect men to give everything we gave in traditional relationships before feminism changed things. You can't use your having a career as an excuse to get out of doing things for your man and then expect him to keep giving while doing everything career wise and at home that his great grandfather had to do. We might be foolish but we're not complete fools.

Part of that is also laziness and disrespect for men. If you have the philosophy that a man's opinions don't matter then you'll do silly things like dress like a bum around the guy 100% of the time at home or cut your hair short and dye it green. Maybe gain 50 pounds. If your "freedom" repulses a man or makes him less interested in romancing you that's on you.

TheLawAroundHere · Answer

This isn't a mystery. Masculinity has been shunned and put down so much that men have been reduced to boys.

I get why men have been reduced to 2nd class citizens. I mean, we have run the world down into the ditch for a long long time. Something... ANYTHING... had to be done.

I dont think that everything that was killed was an intended target. Yes, of course, women are on an even level with me. But since the things that should have been dropped... the harassment, the pay difference, etc... things that should have stuck... the chivalry, the admiration, etc... went the way of the dodo bird, as well.

I tell this to my grandson all the time. If you want it, you can have it. But you have to take all of it. You can't cherry pick.

Angelo75 · Answer

Well I could say "porn" and also "women trying to be less womanly".
I think I'd be more romantic with a woman who appears sensitive, delicate, vulnerable and in the need of a man in her life.

Don't get me wrong. I do believe that woman should have the same rights as men.
I just don't feel very much attracted or romantic when I have a discussion with a woman about who should pay for dinner-date. Or if I should open the door for her or not.

That will kill my romantic vibe.

But that's just my opinion.

Am_and_Pm · Answer

Becz its fu*king 20/20... the blast orginal thought died when the 80' ended. Back when women had few rights and men where doing as they were told.

I feel like today people r waking up and doing different things. However, people who r expecting things the old way, they seem to be a dying breed. Romance, in my opinion, is evolving with us. Which could mean, the end of Love.

So, move over ladies. Robo chicks r coming home tonight. And Good luck. I hear robo chicks know what to do and when to do it.

ZumbiGeneral · Answer

Personally when I am romantic and try it goes unappreciated. When I invite a chick straight to my house I get all the benefits of being a good partner. 🤷🏿‍♂️ not trying to blame but women have killed it these past couple generations. Guys that try get called simps and people label them off. Supposed regular dudes don't really haft to be romantic because girls don't go for those guys in the first place. Now a lot of dudes are creeps and only want to have sex anyways. I dont see why they would need to be romantic either.

Bandit74 · Answer

Well for one it seems like there is not much incentive like the girl doesn't really reciprocate with anything to make the guy feel special or appreciated. It's kind of a one sided expectation. That and girls are sending nudes and casually having sex outside of relationships so why do I want to put in all the effort to be romantic, pay for dates etc knowing some guy on tinder had her sending nudes and naked in his bed with a fraction of the time/effort. Maybe it shouldn't but the the thought of that makes me feel pathetic and inferior compared to the guy that got those things so much easier. If I am going to put in effort towards something I would rather put my efforts into being more like the guys on tinder so I can get the same treatment they get. And I know I am far from the only guy who feels similarly on this topic.

JSmuve · Answer

Probably because if you're romantic with the wrong women it can be a turn off or even seen as creepy.

If you're too romantic, then it becomes an unfair expectation on you that you must continuously exceed to show how much you care (i. e. Valentine's day).

Romance is fine in small doses. But, like anything, it has to be earned by the woman. Guys that give it away too freely set themselves up for being used and unappreciated.

But thanks to society pushing romantic ideals, women don't want to earn it. They expect it and when they don't get it, it's somehow the guy's fault.

Don-_-Don · Answer

I find it weird that people are blaming it on the easy access of sex.

For me it was because my past experiences of being romantic got me into an unesscary world of pain.

The lack of ungrarefulness I saw with my first girlfriend just changed my pov on being romantic for me.

To me I see bring romantic as making yourself as emotionally vulnerable. When heartbreak hits no only I am there to pick up the pieces.

Doing everything right, and still being left in the dirt just makes a man not want to be romantic anymore.

Which

Prof_Don · Answer

The effort of being romantic doesn’t reap enough benefits with a gal who isn’t his girlfriend.

Girls don’t get romance during the dating phase, because women don’t prioritize romance. Most prioritize douchebag behavior & are more likely to fuck him and commit to him, than a romantic guy of equal attractiveness

MannMitAntworten · Answer

In reading the comments from both sexes I would say the overwhelming theme that is slaying romance is, cynicism. Both sexes appear to cynical of the opposite sex in general. Which is likely where most of the disconnect exists in the first place.

Men suck/women suck isn’t paving a path towards endearment for either sex. What is worse is now even within the respective sexes you will find women smearing other women and men smearing other men when they do not equally share in their cynicisms toward the opposite sex. It’s a snake eating its own tail...

Lionman95 · Answer

i think it´s less likely that guys are romantic because we are unsure if females like us being romantic. We often hear about feminism and emanzipation and it makes unsure if we should be romantic. We, guys, learn at some point in life that romance is appreciated.

Dougzy · Answer

I think this is a great question and has been at the forefront of my mind!
and the only conclusion is that not just men I feel women have just become unbelievable aggressive or the last few years I`m not sure why the general population just seems to have trigger happy tempers over the smallest things although this probably the most prosperous society has been in quite a few decades yet, the violence is on the up, divorce, substance abuse, I really have taken a step back from society generally because trying to pleasant has become a liability, I personally love feeling good every day not pretend truly feel good and each day I easily need to avoid at least 10 people before they ruin it foe me. my reason for being on the up is because it is just so much easier. my secret I look for one good thing every day

TheLittleInnocent · Answer

People have different definitions of romantic. I'll assume ur into chivarly. In modern times as in right now i think chivalry is dead. Or it could have changed. It's more dynamic than just opening doors, giving flowers and all the other typical romantic gestures.

nikiarya · Answer

I dont think thats true. Modern romantic men and women both exist, just at a lesser rate because standards have changed. Men are no longer expected to always pay for dates. Things are becoming more 50/50 in more relationships nowadays in comparison to before. And with that, you'll find the burden of being "romantic" on men lessening. However, there will always be certain individuals with a more old school mind who'll bring flowers on a first date, but its just less common as dating is more casual in general now

Skankhunt · Answer

Modern women are picky, they expect too much from men (not all of them). Of course they are men who a romantic during dating and in a relationship, but you have to find them and they have to be willing to be romantic. In fact, some men don't open doors anymore because women can say "I'm perfectly able to open the door myself". Yes, we know that, but we want you to feel special. Some men don't approach girls, because they think "if she wants me, she should approach me".

In todays world it's all about hookups instead of courting girls, which is a bummer. Romance does excist, but it's hard to find.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Because women dont like it mostly and the few that do are not in a position to demand it anymore because most women dont care.

I can burp and fart and tell a girl to stfu so i can watch tv and still have my choice of women. So why would i choose one who makes me be romantic? Especially when that girl is no better than any of the others?

In the past women as a whole demanded some level of gentlemanly behavior and to some level kept their legs closed if they didn't get it. But now thats all out the window.

Avicenna · Answer

Others have given great answers, but in a nutshell, a guy doesn’t have much incentive to pull out the stops unless she expects it, she appreciates it, he’s competing against other guys to get her in a relationship, and she is desirable. A lot of women seem perfectly content with hookups and short term flings. rather than long term relationships, and romance presumes stability.

cth96190 · Answer

Because, on a subconscious level, females are hard wired to see romantic men as weak simps.
They will reject the man who wants to love them and throw themselves, crotch first, at the most worthless sociopathic bad boy they can find.
Ignore what a woman says she wants. Instead, look at for whom she opens her legs.

nonratracereality · Answer

Because you desire what you want and not what they're offering. It's a trend we learn by example. Now if there's no example how do we learn? Uf you want love attention and respect which will yield integrity maturity and responsibility then it starts with you. Dont complain if you dont input. Take care if you the way you need to take care yourself and everything will fall into place.

MrsJaximus-Lion · Answer

because no one is teaching them how to be a romantic guy plus the romantic guys most of them are faking it so they get girls. thank god i never had such experience and i met my true romantic gentleman who keeps spoiling all the time and i do the same for him. if people never teaches their kids! who will teach them then? and have you seen the guys now days they can't even wear a suit and a tie and walk right

JackSmy · Answer

Because you are picking the super-hot, athlete-looking guys! They don't give a shit about a woman! They can get 100, without even trying!
You ignore the guys that will treat you like you want, because they are not superstars, not famous, not actors.
They just care, and would love you, and treat you like a princess, but nobody wants them, so they BITCH and complain, that they can't find a good guy. . .

sahil911 · Answer

Girls become 10 times more attractive when they exhibit their feminine characteristics. Same for the boys when they show their mature and soft side. But due to this hookup culture, sex has become so easily accessible that one doesn't even get the opportunity to know someone better. Coz why make extra effort to be that best version of yourself when it isn't even needed.

At the end of the day, sex in itself can be that driving force that makes a person move. While we just don't put the effort otherwise.

BCA6010 · Answer

A combination of subpar social skills common in our generation, and a general apprehensiveness caused by the seemingly widespread anti-male cultural fad. A lot of guys aren't going to take any initiative with romantic advances when they aren't 100% certain that they aren't going to get accused of harassment. On the other hand, you can also blame the prevalence of hookup culture for this too.

GunnzzNRoses · Answer

Because you are likely typical woman who only goes for looks and not personality. Not saying that's a bad thing, as being a devastatingly handsome man, that's to my benefit. But you need to put more stock into personality in a partner before blaming the entire male sex for your self imposed misfortune.

WindAtMyBack · Answer

Men were never romantic. Few men are naturally romantic. It's learned. Women like it, and men figure that out.

Same with compliments. Women eat that stuff up, and men figure that out.

Both are learned. If they start doing it, they might begin to like it, but it doesn't really come naturally for most men.

Torari · Answer

You're just dating the wrong ones. If you want romance, then the kind of men you're attracted to are probably not the right choice.

Unfortunately, unattractive people are also not the right choice m. So tough luck, you're skrewed. Welcome to planet earth. Population, 7.8 billion.

Vide_Noir · Answer

For myself and those I know, we do try to be romantic. However with some I know there is a sense of just s*x and that's all that's expected. For younger people (18-24) I see a lot on tiktok and the like shaking their butts and it devalues romantic settings. There's no point in a guy trying to be romantic if it's only going to cause them to lose money and even being scolded for simping.

Juxtapose · Answer

I hold off on romance for awhile because most women don't seem really appreciative or reciprocal.

Now.. if she is a sweet woman who will touch my chest and whisper lovely things into my ear, give me massages or even flowers, then sure, let's talk! I will return that same energy.

But if she's just going to play on her phone and expect me to do everything, I'm not going to be romantic for shit (or be around long).

Unit1 · Answer

Well, you haven't met me then. In my experience women are more interested in social media and their phones than they are in love and men and romance.

If you ask me, the girls I see aren't interested in relationships nor romance. 🤷‍♀️

Guanfei · Answer

Maybe because woman don't appreciate it anymore, or take it so much for granted that they don't make any effort to deserve it. Not to mention those who will take advantage of it for their own interest by leading on a romantic man for profit.
And thank feminism too, that taught women that being a gentleman, or a romantic man, was sexist.

I-C3_ME · Answer

XDDD I'm romantic AF, it's probably one of the most attractive things i do. Because i always want to find out I'll kinds of small details so when i find something in a store that reminds of something you said I'll just be like "yep, she gonna smile when i give to her soooo HELL YEAH I'M BUYING THIS", i love making people smile but when i do it the person i love the most, man that feels good hehe

Browneye57 · Answer

Cuz feminism. "We don't need or want no stinkin' men."
And unless he's really good looking, and rich beyond belief, any approach is considered 'creepy'. You girls have done it to yourselves. And you give up sex too easily, so they don't have to do ANYTHING.

bowenw · Answer

I think how a man treats women depends on how he was raised including the example set by his role models, e. g. father, brothers, uncles, etc. Also, decent guys that care about you will treat you respectfully. If there are things you wished a guy would do for you, e. g. holding the door open for you, don't be afraid to tell him it's okay with you and you don't mind guy's that do that. As a guy gets to know you he should pick up on what things please you.

Anonymous · Answer

Because all they need is sex with infinite women. Even if they romance, it will be for their hidden agenda and you will identify it.
Majority of them are pervert dogs. I don't even consider them as men.
All those telling here that women are independent or aren't worth romancing because you dogs can't ever win a good woman. You're acting like grapes are sour. These are the incels that have many failed relationships due to their selfish behavior.

TheFlak38 · Answer

because more and more men figure out how phoney women are thanks to numerous online platforms discussing female nature and behaviour. You say one thing but respond to something different every fucking time. So let's stop perpetuating the myth that women love romance when this is the one thing that turns every woman off.

ManOnFire · Answer

I beg to differ on this one. Many modern men are actually the ones who want to be romantic, but it's a lot of modern women who see romantic men as sissies and are more interested in hooking up with bad asses.

Anonymous · Answer

I used to be romantic with my girlfriend, since the beginning, but I've noticed she wasn't the same. Now I'm avoiding being like that, because I feel stupid when I do. Maybe some guys go through experiences like that, and don't receive a good response, then they stop being afectionate.

pocketman · Answer

Guys don't think of romance in the same way women do. Women fantasize and get ideas from others on what an ideal relationship is like. They need to share this to men and help men understand their wants and needs better.

Anonymous · Answer

We don't have to be anymore. Once, men had to woo and court a woman in order to marry her/have sex with her, like it says in the book "Are Men the Weaker Sex?", free from kobo online books. But now women "give it up" for free so there's no incentive for a man to win her love. (Not that he necessarily loved her in the past. It's just that if he wanted to have sex with her, he usually had to marry her first.)

jasco · Answer

Why put effort into something you can find around the corner? Personally i do enjoy being romantic its fun and i enjoy the sites and smells even if the romance is gone. So basically yea i guess you can say i am a bit selfish but if the date fails at least i got something out of it

Madmegalomaniac · Answer

There's a lot of whiny women who have over politicized human interaction to the point a lot of very simple shit is interpreted at "sexual assault" and/or "creepy". And many guys just don't bother from there.

It would be one thing if they were just judging you, but fear of legal repercussions is very legitimate in my opinion, as no one wants to ruin their lives over it.

caligirl03 · Answer

Ugh I don't know, but it bums me out. PSA to men: Most women LOVE romantic gestures, no matter how small. And please never underestimate the value of being a gentleman either. Especially since that seems to be so rare these days.

Anonymous · Answer

Men used to be romantic because back then women were special and men saw them that way. But today women are no longer special. They have worked very hard to NOT be special, and they have lost the privilege of being treated as special. Men no longer have any motivation to be romantic.

Effably · Answer

What? Men are and always have been the romantic ones. I swear outside of literature nearly every couple I know has the guy as the more romantic one.

Flowers, poetry and romance is (marginally more) a guy thing. Prove me wrong!

BeyondCuriosity · Answer

I think the misconception is that men of the past were more romantic. I think in the past they were very romantic for a time to sort of trap a woman, and then stopped trying. I think there were a lot more unhappy marriages, though less divorces because it was taboo.

Marriedwith2 · Answer

Too many men are not men these days nor understand what being a man entails... now it's cowardly bluster and jealousy/insecurity over what women can do now... that has never been anything other than being a weak fragile boy. So easily butthurt and weak... crying over tv shows and commercials. Do you think them capable of romance while being so petty and selfish?

Why are modern men so unromantic?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Why are modern men so unromantic?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.