Why do extrovert girls judge introvert guys harshly?

[gtex1991]

it seems extrovert girls have a hard time understanding introvert guys. to them, they can't imagine why he acts the way he does.

i always get girls say to me, but you so quiet, you don't smile (which I'm guilty of), you not animated, when I'm at a party they will come to me and say are you OK, are you having fun, when I'm just tired...

then they get frustrated and move, its like they don't take their time to know me

[traintolondon]

I agree with Amorina. Its not that I judge people because they don't talk much, its more the fact that it makes you feel like your unwelcome and a bother when you make the effort to talk to someone you don't know that well and they barely say anything back and looks like they want to be some were else. You said it yourself, when your just tired and bored, you will look tired and bored, and people won't approach you as much as if you look like your friendly and wants to talk.

you can't expect everyone else to come and talk to you and make all the effort and then be irritated and say that they judge you when they give up after they have tried to talk to you with no positive responce. you have to put some effort in to it also. your not the only one who are tired at a party, but if you don't try to have fun and get to know people on your own, then you won't have fun and get to know people. Its as simple as that.

[gtex1991]

i do have fun at parties its just that I get tired after some time usually after 3 hrs hours. and people start treating me like I'm some kind of child.another thing I have against extroverts is that they are in you face and want to know everything about you right away, I do approach people, some I just find nothing in common with them and it pisses them off, imagine if you do't feel an

[gtex1991]

anything for guy are you going to sho interest even if you dont

[Amorina]

For me, I judge a lot on facial expressions. It is frustrating when the expression doesn't change. I am insecure, so if I think he isn't enjoying being with me, I tend to leave. I don't want to feel like a bother. Introverted guys tend to show their feelings on their face a lot less. If I cannot see any enjoyment from being with me on his face, it makes me feel stupid - as if I am the only one having fun and he finds me annoying or boring. I do like shy guys and will try to draw him out of his shell, but it gets hard. If they don't tell you that they enjoy your company, they won't tell you if they think you a pain in the ass. If I can get a shy guy out of his shell to talk to me and tell me how he feels it is the most amazing thing. But, it is difficult. So, I suppose for me, it's not frustration that makes me move on, it's insecurity.

[gtex1991]

insecurity of what

[Amorina]

That he doesn't want to talk to me. That he finds me ugly or annoying.

[gtex1991]

i don't think I would classify that as insecurity if someone doesn't want to talk to you for whatever reason's there is nothing wrong with that, some people you just don't click with, its normal reaction not insecurity

[Amorina]

Yea, but I've found out later that they did want to talk but were just super shy.

[gtex1991]

in that case, you need to be patient, and that's where my problem is, people don't want to take time, they want that instant validation or confirmation.. I'm not shy, but I'm not going to spill my history to you even if you were kind to me, unless if we meet at social event, or something that requires me to tell you my story

[Anonymous]

Hey I'm sorry you had to go through all that. I suppose I fall under extrovert, and a good chunk of my guy friends (my crush/date included) are introverts. I really don't judge people by the amount of talking or how much they party. Instead, I do my best to see people and accept them for who they are. Although, I've seen girls act that way with my guy friends, like they would be all over the guy, trying to get him to date her or whatever, and when those introvert guys don't act the way they should, girls just give up and move on. It's pretty sad, how some people are so judgmental. Just know that not all girls are like that :)

[krisdaschwab912]

Ain't that the truth. I don't do particularly well at parties (especially when music I hate is being played, which is virtually at every party. Goddamn kids need to start listening to real music). I need to be in my own realm in order to be able to really strike up a conversation with a girl I really like. I like to put things in my control, down to the small details, but that never happens at a party. Now, at a concert, on the other hand...

[gtex1991]

yea trying to have conversation at party is hard for me, people are not themselves, so they don't speak what they would speak outside a party

music is loud as usual, only when I go to introvert parties the music is non or just relaxing

[Joe814]

I never really thought of it in terms of extrovert girls giving harsh judgements to introvert guys. I suppose it is a mildly popular stereotype. I know the type though.

[gtex1991]

its just the little comments they make, some of it is annoying, they want to make me look like their is something wrong with me, some girls have laughed at me for they I'am, some patronize which I don't like... all this causes me to shut down and not be responsive to them

[Anonymous]

Because they don't want to get to know you. You're attracted to them because extroverted people are fun, they're exciting, they make things easy. Introverted people may be able to understand you better, but extroverted people want other extroverted people. It's attractive, they get it, and they don't have to do all the work. I'm an extrovert and I can't stand introverted guys.

[gtex1991]

i'm not attracted to them, they come to me. problem is when they see what I'am they run away or don't know what to do... I want women to see MY INTROVERSION FIRST, not some gimmick that everyone puts up when they meet new people. like acting super enthusiastic, or cool, or faking emotions and gestures. and I want guys I meet to see me for who I'am not put me down or act all macho, its annoying and disrespectful when someone exerts their authority on someone for no reason,