Why would an old guy friend from 12 years ago who is about to get married and have a kid tell me he fancied me in highschool?

[Anonymous]

[Jay3344]

Maybe he feels confident and is just not using his verbal filter. Maybe he needed to get it off his chest. I wouldn’t really be flattered because what are your options? Just continue being friends I guess

[Asker]

He still flirts with me and tells me he wished he had me

[Jay3344]

Unless you’re cool with it and want to be friends still, it’s not really a great thing. I mean come on it’s just kind of leading you on or manipulating you. Harmless flirting isn’t bad but if this is what your relationship with him ends up being, it’s like - he’s getting married and having kids…is he just letting you know you’re on the back burner if it doesn’t work out? Like I said though if there’s more to the friendship than maybe just ignore it. No expert here just speaking my mind

[Asker]

I actually ignored him for a few months apparently he was checking out my social media out wondering where I went

[Jay3344]

I told a girl that I had a crush on her in high school, and the sole reason was to get her attention and see where things went. That was during senior week so all bets were off anyways. I wasn't getting married though and to be honest we weren’t really friends before, we knew each other but I was crushing hard. Haven’t said that line since and to be honest it belongs in the past. 18 year old move vs 32 move. Lot more self control now, most of the time 😂.

[Asker]

I can't believe he still likes me tho after all these years. He graduated in 2009 a year before me as I'm year younger. Then I noticed he added me just last year so I reached out because I got curious why he liked every single picture of my art work on Instagram and random memes on Facebook.

[Jay3344]

I couldn’t tell you why people do what they do. I had a dream this year about the girl I mentioned, and I haven’t seen her since 2008.

[horatiohornblower]

He probably is giving one last shot for his dream girl. Possibly he has cold feet about his marriage or is settling on his future wife but really wants another.

[Asker]

I guess it normal to have these thoughts for life in general such as a job, house and who we marry. Tbh I think I would be like this aswell I'm never really sure if I'm doing the right thing

[horatiohornblower]

Yes, a lot of people panic when a big life change nears. Because they don't know if they're making the right decision. I certainly wouldn't advise acting on this. I guess unless you want to be misses whoever he is and invite a major s**t show on your life. Then I suppose, "All's fair in love and war".

[Asker]

He honestly shouldn't of went so hard-core with these enagments and living together. She basically moved in very early in the relationship

[horatiohornblower]

Both were probably at that point were it was time to settle and get married. As long as the match is decent enough. A lot of people do that. They hit an age wall. Then it's like, "Holy Crap! I need to get married and crank out some kids before it's too late."

[Asker]

I'm 29 now and still single 🤣 I was busy in my 20s had uni, travelled and worked abroad for 2 years

[Asker]

It's certainly too late for me that's for sure lol

[horatiohornblower]

Nonsense, you’re still young. You can still get married and have kids if you want. My mom has me at 35.

[Asker]

Yes I think you are right tho I shouldn't act this at all. Maybe if he was single 🤔 but he is in way too deep 🤣

[horatiohornblower]

What can one say but c’est la vie. Definitely a bad situation to consider though.

[Asker]

He looks happy with her online... just shows you don't believe in social media because I didn't expect him to do this. He wasn't that kind of guy in HS

[horatiohornblower]

They always look happy online. People choose their couples photos carefully. Marriage announcement photos are even worse about this. Using a photographer to make this perfect fantasy union.

People do change a lot from high school. Mostly because they were trying to fit in.

[Asker]

I try not to get sucked into it as its all lies at the end of the day. Imagine if she knew what was really going on with her husband to be

[horatiohornblower]

She wouldn't be a happy camper. As nothing actually happened. He'd probably be able to weasel out of it after a few weeks in the doghouse. Especially if she really wants marriage.

[Asker]

Huh what do you mean? I guess I kinda came into his life again late

[horatiohornblower]

I thought you were referring to. Imagining how the fiance of the guy who made a play for you would react if she knew.

[Asker]

Oh yes I got lost haha

[ChiPaPa]

I dunno. I've had a few girls do the same after having been married and have several kids. Maybe it's just a sense of closure to something they thought they had.

[Asker]

he's still flirting with me tho

[ChiPaPa]

No clue. Maybe wants to cheat.

[Asker]

I'm getting so down these days I'm just getting nonsense from guys. I'm not boring I've done decent stuff in my life lived abroad, studied and I'm easy going

[Wise4myage]

Maybe he's hoping for a hookup? Or he's just being random?

[Asker]

He kept saying he wished he could have me

[Wise4myage]

Bingo, lol.

[Asker]

What?

[Wise4myage]

He wants to hookup.

[Asker]

I wish we could be more but he's in deep now

[Wise4myage]

In deep as in married or taken?

[Asker]

Yes he's getting married next march

[Wise4myage]

Then he shouldn't sending you messages.

[Asker]

He could be having second thoughts about who knows. If I was getting married and happy I wouldn't be confessing feelings at this stage

[Wise4myage]

Make sense I guess.

[Asker]

I guess we all have to pick someone at some point

[whosnumber1]

it could be it's just something he's always wanted to tell you and now that he has moved on he feels comfortable telling you

[PuNishant]

He want to do it with you before getting married.

[Manchild2018]

He is fishing

[Rohaan2020]

Bcz he still does