Could I maybe have turned my boyfriend off by showing him my gag answers for the friend problem that I had?

[xJayleenx]

He was implying to me that I should forgive the friend that cursed me out than I showed him a comment that I got on here saying that she was toxic and a bitch and stuff and talked about how I was used to mistreatment because of my mom and the other comments too saying to move on and stuff from that friend. I also told him when I have any doubts I always go on here it really helps me and he told me “it’s okay you just want to know about people’s opinions” and then he asked me “am I good to you?” I don’t know why he would ever ask me this and I told him “yes you’re very sweet” after that he didn’t text me almost the whole time at work (he usually does text me) claiming that he was sleeping and after getting back home after midnight I texted him as well but he didn’t even open my messages which is weird because he already slept. Also when I was in the car he kept on trying to watch videos and put the volume up he’s been doing that though I guess he’s tired of my talking. I think I’ll just leave my phone at home so that I don’t worry about him texting me now I feel like I’m a nuisance to him so I don’t really want to. In my text I was just telling him that he didn’t have to hang out with me on Sunday if he didn’t want to and that I apologized if I irritated him for talking so much but it’s been like 8 hours and he hasn’t answered or opened it even though he claimed that he took a long nap before picking me up from work. I think that maybe I’m annoying him or maybe he’s tired of my clinginess or something I’ll just stop texting him until evening for today I guess I just feel like a nuisance to him.

Updates

+1 y

I was kind of wondering now if he loves me or if he’s just comfortable with me. He is still very affectionate but I don’t get why he was acting distant over text and why he always puts the radio up or videos loud as if he didn’t want to talk to me it feels like.

[HighlyVolatile]

I'd miss your Qs on here -- but in my blunt opinion -- it might be good not to seek advice from the internet for such personal things.

I'm just going by a guess but maybe he feels like he knows about your friend better than people on the internet who have never even met her; he might also feel a bit strange by the prospect that some parts of his relationship with you might be broadcasted on the internet.

I'd try to talk to him but try not to be negative or insecure. Just keep it to sharing and learning more about each other.

[HighlyVolatile]

My thinking is that this has less to do with his friend. He might be a bit irritated by the notion that any bumps on the road with him might be broadcasted on this site.

[xJayleenx]

He’s like you guys he has never met her I haven’t either we’ve just texted

[HighlyVolatile]

* [...] with [this/your] friend [...]

[HighlyVolatile]

I see -- in that case, if he thinks he should be the sole one able to give you advice on such subjects, that does seem a bit controlling and immature. But if my suspicions might apply that it's not really about your friend and more about the relationship between you two, that seems a bit more like a legit reason for a guy to get upset/annoyed.

[xJayleenx]

I don’t know yesterday morning we went shopping together but he didn’t buy anything it seemed to be like i was the only one having fun and excited. Yesterday I talked a lot due to drinking coffee and he told me that a girl had like twerked on him in highschool and I freaked out in a funny dramatic way he was laughing. He was still being very sweet with me and loving in person but he hasn’t responded to my texts

[xJayleenx]

I also told him why he has to be like the rest of his family and not get vaccinated and stuff because it’s not a big deal, and that why did he turn down pretty girls but decided to date his exes instead lol stuff like that I was super hyper

[HighlyVolatile]

He might be going through a rough time outside your relationship somehow. Mostly I'd just try to keep the communication open but maybe give him some space to recharge his battery.

[xJayleenx]

He seems okay he’s visiting his best friend today meanwhile ill be at work in a few hours. He also joined an honors society club he brought up on how his brother is moving to Germany but he doesn’t seem sad about it. He’s used to being away from him anyway since his brother is a global truck driver

[xJayleenx]

I was thinking about calling him asking him if something’s wrong but I’ll give him his space

[HighlyVolatile]

Maybe give him a bit more time and see if he comes around on his and if not, a call seems like a better idea than text.

[HighlyVolatile]

This is the same one from over a year ago, right? Like already an LTR.

[xJayleenx]

We’ve been together for over two years now

[xJayleenx]

I have mentioned this site before but never showed him the answers to my questions

[HighlyVolatile]

In that case, I especially think breaking up over this seems a bit hasty. It's maybe just a hiccup. I'd just try to have a nice day today and see if he comes around.

[xJayleenx]

He’s the only guy that has told me that he wants to marry me too

[HighlyVolatile]

I remember that. There are usually going to be some rough patches here and there. People can be in a bad mood sometimes. Most of the time it's just a misunderstanding of sorts if a person's mood has something to do with their lover. So I'd just give him some time to clear his mind and look for a nice and inviting spot to further build that mutual understanding.

[Andres77]

Does he know this other girl?
You're not in a relationship with anyone in here, in GaG so why is he so offended that you seek other perspectives?
Does he get upset that you use a dictionary to look up definitions instead of asking him?
Seems petty to me.

[xJayleenx]

Your answer was actually the one that I showed him. This website is very personal to me I shouldn’t have showed him anything.

[xJayleenx]

No we’ve both never met her

[Andres77]

I knew it as soon as I read it.
There are lots of opinions.
Everyone has to deal with stuff and we're all trying to figure out life.
Some do and some don't and many of us struggle and at the end of the day we just want someone to love us.
Here's the key.
Love yourself first.
It's not arrogance.
It's having enough love and respect for yourself so that you simply won't tolerate any disrespect or hurtful behavior against you.
.

[Andres77]

Here's a general rule: the one that cares the least for a relationship is the one that has the power.
You love him, clearly. But by your own admission you're clingy. He knows this too.
You're desperate not to lose him. He knows this.
So he thinks he can get away with making snide and petty comments to you and you'll just tolerate it and probably blame yourself.
I'm not a therapist but... I've seen too much abusive or manipulative behavior to just think he's having a bad day... again... and again and it's your fault somehow.
I'm not saying that he doesn't love you but when disrespect creeps in and it's not confronted... he loses a little respect for you... over time that builds towards manipulation and disregard... because he's never held accountable.
Do you see how this can play out?
And don't just accept this as true without getting other girl's opinions, especially any who have dealt with manipulative boyfriends.
I'm not saying this is what you'd do but I've seen the following situation played out before: the clingy girlfriend thinks she's losing him so she stops using birth control so she'll get pregnant and then he HAS to stay with her. Just a disaster waiting to happen.
He never stays, she ends up pregnant and alone and stuck.
Young lady, you need to love yourself enough to not allow him to disrespect you because it will only grow and his love for you will diminish because if you can't love yourself why should he? He'll look at this like he's doing you a favor.
If he doesn't think he's going to have a good time with you on Sunday then he just shouldn't bother showing up. Is he just getting sex on Sunday anyway? And then he rolls over and starts looking at his phone?
These are patterns of behavior.
Love yourself enough to be willing to end the relationship if you have to.
He shouldn't disrespect you.
I'd run what I've written past a few girls before acting on it.
Loving yourself does take courage.
I'm cheering for you.
Just want you happy.

[xJayleenx]

I don’t know how to feel because he’s sweet to me in person and he does take me to worl everyday and picks me up which takes sacrifice. He never brings me down always calls me beautifulll and pretty he’s just not texting me and he puts the volume high when we’re together I feel like I’m a nuisance to him because of this I don’t know why he said that he’ll have a fun Saturday but didn’t mention Sunday our day together sometimes I get sad in our relationship because I always seem so excited and him always tired and sometimes i feel bad about him not posting me ever even when I tell him. I’m planning to just leave my phone in the house so that I won’t worry I might not text him until evening.

[Andres77]

Good, let him wonder.
I think that's an excellent start.
Please keep us updated.

[xJayleenx]

He just texted me saying that I don’t irritate him and that he was actually having fun with our conversations and he said of course I want to hang out with you my love. I’ll still give him his space though

[xJayleenx]

I didn’t text him for a while. He thought that I was mad at him

[Andres77]

I'm on the outside looking in.
I don't know all the details.
He SHOULD be concerned about losing you. And he should treat you accordingly.
You pour your heart and soul into relationships be it family, friends and your fiance.
Being vulnerable is fine as long as they treat you with care.
I'm not saying anyone should coddle you but that they should value you for who you are and what you bring to the relationship.
Safe and healthy and happy.
That's my hope and wish for you in everything.

[xJayleenx]

Thank you I know that he really cares about me

[Andres77]

🙏🙏🙏

[LovingLoverReturned]

Does he text you EVERY time at work? Or are your own fears exaggerating usual behavior?

I like HighlyVolatile's answer about him """possibly"""" worrying about privacy.

Even so, it's alright not to share every thing you do in private with a boyfriend. Possibly your boyfriend could feel bad if he thinks you compared his opinion with strangers (when he asks if he is good to you), so if you are not sure you will listen to his opinion, it might be better not to ask unless you say your are doing a """survey""" upfront and make it clear do he doesn't get his hopes up that you want specially his opinion.

[SnakeBoop]

If the question is about you and your friend, why's he getting pissy anyway?
sounds like he's a immature brat who wants to be your only source of info, which is incredibly dodgy as fuck.

[SnakeBoop]

and also manipulating you through the abusive silent treatment. such a charmer

[xJayleenx]

He didn’t say anything and he’s still being sweet in person I guess I was being kind of annoying yesterday because I had coffee and talking too much

[Andres77]

@xjayleenx
You drank too much coffee so it's your fault?
Sounds like you're making excuses for him.

[xJayleenx]

@Andres77 I don’t really know what’s going on what do you think? I’m confused why he’s mot texting me and I told him have a good weekend baby and he responded with “I’ll have a good Saturday” he’s going to be with his friend that day but he didn’t mention Sunday which is the day that he’ll get to be with me

[xJayleenx]

He responded with that in person becsuse he hasn’t texted me

[Andres77]

Courage, girl.
I'm a little more harsh in what I think you need to do.
He's not treating you well.

[SnakeBoop]

@xjayleenx Your boyfriend is immature and being a cunt for no reason. ditch

[WhitneySnow]

Some guys aren’t good at texting but are really affectionate in person. And maybe he just didn’t wanna talk right at that moment.

[RealMarek]

It seems like an extreme reaction to wanting opinions from anonymous people about your friend.

[888theGreat]

That is called years in to a relationship. But if you told him you had cancer with three days to live , he would be upset.

[2021biguy]

He should treat you how you treat him. He should answer your texts on time and not ignore you.

[Deku2009]

Maybe you should text him apology , so ask him any way to make it up
to him

[Bklynbadboy12]

He probably felt you should've came to him first

[Bklynbadboy12]

Do you think he felt that way