How to get over a anxiety of showing interest in guys or approaching them?

[Anonymous]

TLDR: bullied by boys growing up not I’m scared to show interest in guys without being super anxious. Never been kissed or had a boyfriend.

I’m really bad at showing interest when I think a guy is cute much less starting conversation. I grew up bullied and made fun of especially by guys so to me showing interest feels like I death trap and sets off my anxiety completely (even though I’m now considered pretty conventionally attractive.) Never had a boyfriend and never been kissed it’s embarrassing at this point! I’ve gotten better by trying to smile to my best ability but for years I would try to look as disinterested as humanly possible. How can I get over my fear and actually talk to guys I like?

[Static_In_The_Attic]

As they say you can’t chance the past however you can change the future. As for me I once had a fear of heights & one year around Christmas my mother got really sick & it was days before Christmas & we didn’t have any decorations up so my sisters & I went to work. As for me I was in charge of putting up a Christmas tree & working on outside lights. It was cold & icy outside & I grabbed a ladder & extended it up on the side of the house & I climbed the roof & put lights up. I was scared & a few times I almost slid off the roof. That year my fear of heights was no more. As for you I double dare you to start going up to guys & after you do maybe your fear will drift away as well.

[Aerissa_Jade]

Thing that is really hard to realize is that rejection doesn't matter. Everyone gets spurned or rejected, its part of life.

I know its easier said than done, coming from someone (like me) who was literally so shy that I'd rather flunk school than give a presentation in front of the class... yet I evolved into someone who still scared asf to present in front of others but yet for a time I became a performer and was center of attention.

Just do it, is all I can really say... one thing to try not to do, is don't imagine going on dates or more with someone, and get extremely invested before you ask... otherwise if you do, rejection hurts more.