How can I handle the situation?

[Anonymous]

A young colleague of mine praises me a lot and expressed that she really likes me. She would love to be my partner. I have a husband. But since I know that my colleague likes me, I have become emotionally attached to him. And I'm starting to like him too. Since then I've started comparing myself to younger girls and it frustrates me. I wonder how long he will like me and I am scared of the future. I am also jealous. These all make me feel bad and ashamed. What can I do?

[SunflowerT96]

Ignore the horrible reply on here. Its completely normal to get feelings for someone even when you're in a relationship. People are complicated not everything is black and white! It's what you do that matters. Maybe you need to sit back and think about your relationship with your husband.. are you happy? Are you missing anything? Can it be fixed etc. Maybe try spending some time with him to figure this out and step back from your coworker for a little bit until you know how you really feel. Don't worry you're not a bad person, you just need to be honest with everyone involved

[HollyK21]

This was sort of confusing. Your female partner praises you a lot and wants to be your partner, but it’s making you attached to your husband and liking him again? Maybe there’s a mix up there or something...

[Asker]

Oh, sorry. My male co-worker. I wrote it wrong

[HollyK21]

Oh! That makes more sense then lol. Well in this case, it might be wise to create some distance between you and the coworker, and have a conversation with your husband about these feelings. You don’t have to be very detailed, but essentially letting him know that you aren’t feeling desire or attraction from him, and you crave that recognition. On a surface level you may disagree, but when you think about it, once you’ve been in a relationship long enough, and your partner isn’t reminding you often how beautiful and hot you are, or doting over you how he used to, it makes you crave that reassurance. To me, this is why so many women fall into the dynamic where they’re flirting with a coworker, or a guy out of sight from their partner. Because this new person is making you feel desired, like you’ve still got it and surely that is refreshing. But now that you are catching feelings, you’ve stepped outside of merely feeling good, and playing with fire. If you are unhappy in your marriage to the extent that you want to explore options with another man, then you should leave your husband, because even creating a bond with another man to where there’s potential to cheat one day is not alright. And unless you are in a completely loveless marriage, then if the shoe were on the other foot you’d be enraged and hurt to find your husband is falling for a coworker. All this to say, correct what you can with your man, if you’re willing. Give him the chance to make you feel what this younger man feels, so that you don’t crave the attention so much.

[Googlemyahoo]

If the dude doesn’t respect your current relationship he’s a scumbag and will move on once the next catch arrives.

[maximumpower]

Figure out if you want to remain married, THEN make the decision.

[spartan55]

I love how you list all of your selfish concerns, and NONE of them mention your husband. You are gross.