Guys, What’s this guy’s deal?

[Anonymous]

Someone I work with (once or twice a week) keeps commenting on things like my shoes (how he likes them), my pants (what kind are they, how they fit better), my muscle gain (I recently started working out), even going as far as to say that I “look fit” several times. He recently told me that I had a nice tan… I was taken aback and said, “What? Who me?” He replied with, “I like the tan” while gently grazing my arm. He always seems happy to see me and never misses an opportunity to touch me… it comes across as sweet, but it has me confused. The first few times I thought that maybe he was just touchy-feely, but I’ve never really seen him interact with other women… and it would seem strange for him to be this way with everyone… although anything is possible. Whether it’s my lower back, shoulder, hand, or arm, his hand seems to lightly graze me every time we see each other. He also asks a lot of questions. Sometimes I feel like I’m on a job interview. Conversations are effortless, but he does not really respond to texts… only occasionally. He does however mention the content of the texts when we are face to face. Weird. I adore this man, but he is an enigma… he is either the nicest man I’ve ever met, or a sociopath. What gives?

Updates

+1 y

At times it feels like he likes me, but perhaps he is just overly friendly. Normally I would just ask what he’s thinking, but I don’t how to ask without making it awkward.

Updates

+1 y

*Don’t know how to ask without making it awkward

[Anonymous]

It's difficult to say for certain what this guy's deal is without more information about his behavior and intentions. However, based on what you've described, it's possible that he may be interested in you romantically or sexually.

Some possible signs that he may be interested in you include his compliments on your appearance, his physical touch, and his interest in your life and interests. However, it's important to remember that these behaviors can also be signs of a friendly or flirtatious personality, and that it's always important to communicate openly and respectfully with each other.

If you're interested in exploring a potential relationship with this guy, it may be helpful to communicate your feelings and intentions clearly and to listen to his thoughts and feelings as well. However, it's also important to respect his boundaries and to make sure that any interactions or behaviors are consensual and respectful.

It’s up to you to decide how to approach the situation and to prioritize your own emotional well-being. If you're feeling uncertain or confused, it may be helpful to seek support from a trusted friend, family member, or mental health professional. They can help you explore your thoughts and feelings, and develop strategies for communicating effectively and respectfully with this guy.

[Opinion Owner]

It's understandable that you may feel hesitant to ask him directly about his intentions, as it can be a difficult and awkward conversation to have. However, communication is key in any relationship, and it's important to be honest and direct about your thoughts and feelings.

One approach could be to start by expressing your own thoughts and feelings, rather than asking him directly about his. For example, you could say something like, "Hey, I just wanted to let you know that I really enjoy spending time with you and appreciate your compliments and attention. I'm not sure if you feel the same way, but I just wanted to be honest about how I'm feeling."

This approach allows you to share your thoughts and feelings without putting pressure on him to respond in a certain way. It also gives him the opportunity to share his own thoughts and feelings if he feels comfortable doing so.

[D_Bone_Steak]

It's just a practice by salesman-type people. My wife and I started seeing a marriage counselor and she'd give me a compliment on something every time we came in. I caught on to the game and would give one back. She recognized it and called it out as just a strategy... is what it is... just a strategy to put people back.

[1123581321b]

@jasondaman Your response was excellent. What he said. I believe you should listen to your gut, as you know him better than anyone else here (probably?). He might like you. Or he might be a (psycho) sociopath. You never know, but useful signs can be how "aggressive" he is about touching you, how much he respects your feelings, etc.

[JasonDaMan]

Thank you

[spartan55]

What gives with what? Sociopath? Wth are you talking about?

[Asker]

It’s hard to tell if he’s just being nice, or buttering me up for something… I quite like him, so I hate to think that he’s just toying with me.

[spartan55]

Well get to know him better and you will know. This is accomplished by talking to him, not microanalyzing and overthinking every single thing he says and does.
Pretty irresponsible using the sociopath label... avoid trendy psych buzzwords.

[ImalwaysrightOK]

He knows nothing about flirting. He thinks paying random compliments is flirting.

[Danny_dan92]

He doesn’t understand the concept of separating business with pleasure. Simple as that

[mommymommymommy]

Is he good looking to you. Would it matter if he was ugly?

[Anonymous]

Inappropriate touching but I'd say he likes you.

[In_Trance]

Wants to rail you