Is a guy yelling over a joke a red flag I should be taking seriously?

[Anonymous]

He said that he never takes photos of himself but he only does it for me and I jokingly said ‘seems like a beta thing to do’ and he was yelling ‘fuck you’ to me. The most aggressive way I have seen. I’ve only known him for a week and no there is no roles of us being alpha or beta (has never been mentioned) I feel like this radiates insecurity and kinda scares me because it makes you think what else will he get mad over. I’m 18 he is 20. Is this not a big deal?

[Daniela1982]

Why ask us? We ae not in the situation and can't see his body posture or anything else. You are. So all I can say is go with your gut feelings. They are right more times than not.

[Anonymous]

Red flag. Both the yelling and the insecurity aren't a good sign. If it's that easy to get him yelling at you, it makes me worry how quick he might be to hurt you over other things in the future. Perhaps that's me worrying too much, but even if he never physically hurts you, just him being so quick to yell is certainly a red flag.

[TooHot2Care]

Red fla- ……. How is this even a question? Like that isn’t just a red flag, that’s a sign that says “RUNZ. ESCAPE. GET OUT OF THERE.”

ohhhhh I see what’s going on….. This guy must be super hot and have a Fuck ton of social pull and you’re looking for reasons to ignore what would cause you to head for the hills for ANYONE else….

[Adam1978]

That's why you should be very careful making jokes around people you don't know. Especially if the joke is on them. So never joke on the others expense until you know they can handle it and knows its a joke, ie they know how to read you. If you want to start joking do it on your own expense.

[FilmGuy93]

How would that ever be anything but a red flag?

[Kaneki05]

Not that I think slut is a bad thing mind you, but if a guy said to a girl "seems like a slut thing to do." most girls would take offence. Or if we use the word bitch or something else.
Most people aren't gonna respond to those things positively. So you expect a guy you've known a week to be one who's unphased, you would have to know him better than that lol.

[Summeroflove]

It’s a extreme reaction… That is for sure. But you gotta be careful who you joke with. Some people aren’t good at it.

If someone feels offended by something they need to express it in a way that’s not screaming and yelling.

Some people feel very offended over stuff that might not offend most people. I’m sure you have triggers as well. But there is a healthy way to say…. Something upset you

[SomeGuyCalledTom]

I can understand why he might perceive the joke as being in poor taste, but his over the top reaction isn't a good sign of things to come. A man who can't compose himself when challenged in a playful context will certainly not compose himself when life REALLY challenges him.

[JSmuve]

He needs to regulate his emotions better. You need to learn better "jokes". You said there was no talk of alpha vs beta before, but now there has been, and you camped him in the beta group. You're young, but you have a lot to learn about men.

[AdithyaR]

Sounds like he cares a lot about the alpha beta nonsense.
Honestly I don't appreciate people talking about it with me either cause it's an annoying topic but i respond by either asking them to avoid that or simply walking away from the conversation.
The fact that he began yelling is a bad sign.

[Spongebobssocks]

In this case I would say you were wrong. You should never joke over a man's manlyhood. It's kinda like if he would have told you he talks to many hoes like you as a joke it would still hurt you. Clearly that's not true im just explaining.

[Anonymous]

That was not a joke.. That was a back handed insult that you only told him was a joke so he wouldn't be upset. No he should not have gotten that upset.. But you should also grow up and not hurl insults if you're not willing to accept the consequences.

[BoopBoopBeep]

There is nothing you can call a man that is more insulting or degrading than a beta. Maybe a cuck, though some guys are into that. Would you call a black guy you're dating... that word?

[jshm2]

It's red flag for him that you're a petty bitch, that will try and get a rise out of him, then claim innocence.

He'll probably ditch you next time you do it.

[shi-shi]

This guy would legit burst into tears if you said that to him

[Anonymous]

"Seems like a beta thing to do" was a severe low blow so I don't blame him for reacting that way.

If a woman reacted like that towards a guy that made a disgusting joke, all the women on here would be praising her.

[stepyo99]

LOL no, he seems like a real nice guy. I'm sure he's a real sweetheart and not an insecure loser with anger issues.

[Sour-rose]

Yeaaah he's a sensitive mofo. I mean not a red flag but damn boy... chill.

[Wild_princess]

Well in my rule book, how person behave in anger is a major yes or no for me

[Nikki1989]

That is a sign to have nothing to do with this guy in the future. He is a loose cannon. You don't need that.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Why do you still care enough about this guy to even ask if you should still be with him?

But yeah you might’ve said it as a joke but that doesn’t mean it came across as a joke

[Anonymous]

you've only known him for a week, i'd immediately cut him out asap. he sounds young and dumb.

[magiusX26]

red flag kind of, keep in mind he was just returning the energy you were putting forth.

[magiusX26]

your "joke" isn't even near the category of funny for a guy you are seeing and just starting out. it would be like him "joking" with you if something like you telling him "i normally dont kiss on the 1st date but i will for you" and his response being "sounds kind of slutish" .

[Shamalien]

when the opposite sex makes an insensitive “joke” about your manlyness or womanly ness, it doesn’t usually go over well

[Mangospacho]

That is a beta move on his part - definitely a red flag.