I started a casual relationship with a younger guy that's meant for just sex. We only made out once and were planning to have sex the next time. I told him to reach out to me. I decided to go no contact until he messaged me first since I had been the one messaging him first. It worked and he messaged me a week later after I posted a story where I looked really good. To my confusion, he said that he doesn't think he can give me what I want but would like to still be friends. What does this mean? Does it mean what he is saying or is he trying to have the upper hand by saying this before I do since I had no contact. I did not watch his stories or like any of his posts for a week and did not reach out in any way which was unusual for me. I just went about my life and had a great time with friends. Please help me solve this. Thank you!
"Hey I’ve been thinking and I just don’t know if I’ll be able to be for you what you want. We can be friends which would be cool but I don’t know about anything more. Just wanted to be honest and let you know"
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Opinion
1Opinion
His use of friend could be twofold. On on hand is friend zoned which means game over relationship.
But since you're friends with benefits, perhaps he wants more than that. He wants a real romantic relationship.
I think a good way to find out is to talk and ask.
Arrange for a romantic dinner. Then observe his reaction there.
If he's uncomfortable, then it's time to move on.
Otherwise, just ask if he wants to have something more from current relationship.
Then talk openly and honestly.
It's better than speculating and guessing.
Thank you!
This is what he wrote:
Hey I’ve been thinking and I just don’t know if I’ll be able to be for you what you want. We can be friends which would be cool but I don’t know about anything more. Just wanted to be honest and let you know
OMG!
The use of "is not you, it's me" kind of expression, and words like "let's be honest" means its over.
Sorry.
Thank you. Hard to hear but I think you're right. I was hoping it was more of an ego thing since I pretty much stopped all communication with him for a week. I felt as though he was insecure and had to react before getting hurt or something.
You are playing too many games for someone that just wants sex
It's not that. I'm trying not to but I've always been the one to reach out and after me sort of hooked up, I wasn't sure if he would reach out. I decided to go silence to see if he would reach out to me first. He did but said he wanted to be just friends because he didn't think he could give me what I want. I'm just confused and want to know the mentality behind this. If anything. I just gave him space
He met someone else.