Do you let your partner have male/female friends?

[Anonymous]

I have a male co-worker who I'm really close to. We go to pub after work or he invites me on nights out. Sometimes we talk on the phone or we message back and forth. There's been times where he's texted late at night and my husband notices and insists on checking my phone. Sometimes, he can be flirtatious in the texts but I don't reciprocate and its more of a "work husband" type of banter than anything else. My husband dislikes it when he comments and likes my Instagram posts or when I do it. He says I overstep professional boundaries and it leads to fights about me cheating on him.

I'm questioning if he's just being irrational and insecure or if I'm in the wrong.

[Anonymous]

Work husbands/wives should not exist when you have real ones. Hanging out after work, late night texting, flirting, why would your partner be ok with that? It’s ok to have friends of the opposite sex, your husband can’t dictate that, but there needs to be a level of respect in place, because it’s so easy for your friend to get the wrong impression, therefore giving him false hope. I think you need to create some healthy boundaries within that friendship, majorly for your husbands peace of mind but also to reiterate with your friend that this is strictly platonic. Don’t do anything you wouldn’t want done to yourself.

[Anonymous]

I don't care, but if the other person was there messaging my partner late at night and they were flirtatious text sent. I would be expressing that wasn't okay.

[richardcory]

Let isn't appropriate. My partner isn't my slave or my property, they can act as they wish. I'm not at all bothered if my partner has male friends.

I never snoop on their phone.

That said, I wold not be thrilled about their flirting with someone else. Not upset or anything, but not ideal

[madhatters4]

i don't decide who my wife's friends are. she's an adult so it's not a matter of letting her have friends. so long as i trust the people she is friends with i don't care if they male, female or other

[madhatters4]

thanks for MHO

[Agape93]

They can be friends with whoever they want