What do I want from him? I am confused?

So, there is this guy I know we do not have a future together, but I used to talk late at night mostly nsfw but I think about him all the time. I want to forget him but at the same time want to be just friends with him. Please help what to do? ITS been 2 years since we talking andd my feelings are the same, doesn't go away. haven't met him in person, because I dont want to, but at the same time i feel like I should. I am literally so confused! I wanna move on but I just can't lol i know weird! Never felt like this before! Why I feel this way? And what do i do about this? Your opinions would help maybe!

What do I want from him? I am confused?
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