Why do my mom says that ''guys don't trust girls with too many guy friends''?

Question

I have too many guy friends but they are my ''just'' friends. Still, my mom thinks that when I flirt with a guy he won'T trust me for having too many guy friends... Do you agree? What is the problem here?

carenina · Accepted Answer

I remember my mom expressing the idea that "guys don't trust girls with too many guy friends." This belief can stem from a variety of factors, including concerns about potential jealousy or insecurity within relationships. It's important to approach this sentiment with understanding.

Often, it's not about gender but about fostering trust, open communication, and setting boundaries in a relationship. Building trust and empathy between partners is essential. It's possible for both men and women to have close friends of any gender without it affecting the trust within a relationship.

A healthy relationship is built on trust and mutual respect. It's important to have conversations with your partner about boundaries and trust to ensure a harmonious and empathetic connection.

Ozanne · Accepted Answer

I've never heard this. However, in my opinion it would be best if you had a mix of friends. Both men and women, and different ages from different walks of life. If it's just men, all of a certain age, then it just seems like the girl is a collector of men, which would seem odd to a man. I try to think of it the other way around too--what if a man only had women friends, and many of them. To me, it just seems like a person can be more well-rounded with different types of people in their life.

strawberrybaby3 · Accepted Answer

Yes I completely agree. Men know how other men are. A man is not going to feel comfortable being in a relationship with a girl that has a lot of guy friends. Not because they don’t trust YOU, but because they know the intentions men have by befriending a girl. It is rarely ever innocent. They are looking for their way in.

Would you like it if a guy you wanted to be with had a bunch of girl friends?

s10sleeper · Accepted Answer

In my experience, when a girl has a lot of guy friends, many of those guys want more than just friendship. Those guys often do things to try to cause problems in the relationship. Sometimes those guys are even creepy. It may be something you aren’t able to notice, but it’s noticeable to people outside of the friendship. I was once with a girl whose “best friend” was a married man that had started talking about leaving his wife and was talking about them being together, despite the fact that she was seeing me. When she told him that nothing would ever happen between them, he suddenly didn’t care so much about being friends

dynamicyandere · Accepted Answer

If you have a lot of guy friends and are not attracted to any of them and they aren’t attracted to you romantically and you aren’t keeping them around for validation, then you’re a special case and a special exception.

The fact is MOST of the time when a girl has a ton of guy friends around her, it’s not completely innocent or honest.

Usually there are guys in the group that want to get with her. Or, she has feelings for some guys, and they’re back ups. Or there’s an insecurity issue and she constantly needs make validation.

Because of that common scenario, most guys see it as a red flag.

ZackBan · Answer

You literally used quotation marks on the "just" 😂
Clearly even you know they're not just friends

And yes your mom is correct.
Women tend to be turned on by a man who has a lot of prospects because they feel special if they are chosen by the man who could've picked anyone.

Men don't work the same way.
We look for peace of mind.
A girl with as few guy friends as possible is ideal. Less competition, less worrying that she might get drunk and let him take advantage. Less him poisoning the well in hops to ruin us as a way to get her for himself...

ProbablyClueless · Answer

Your mom is 100% right... We don't trust women with lots of guy friends. It's a massive red flag. There are a few reasons for that;

We know that women's ideas of friendship are a lot more intimate than men's.
We know that most of those men aren't only interested in you as a friend.
We know that THERE IS ABSOLUTELY A REASON YOU DON'T CHILL WITH OTHER GIRLS, and we know that that reason is almost never a good thing.
We know that women with lots of guy friends tend to be attention-seekers.

I really want to emphasize the idea that we know there is a reason you don't get along with other women. Obviously, there could be a lot of reasons that women don't want you around. It's possible that you genuinely aren't doing anything wrong, but my experience has been that women who don't want another woman around usually don't want her around because of something to do with abrasive personality traits or boyfriend concerns.

Anonymous · Answer

In your heart, if you and your guy friends are genuinely hiding nothing, then that's okay. You're allowed to have friends of the opposite sex just like men can. Anyone who wants to separate you from your friends is insecure about them. You should be trusted to decline advances from people you're not interested in, even if they were just pretending to be your friend to get closer to you somehow. You can't help who you are attracted to, just be sure everyone's on the same page, no one should make you feel bad for having guy friends. My best friend is a she/they and people constantly think we're dating or married even when we're not. People *can't* understand non-romantic cross-sex friendships sometimes.

Anonymous · Answer

Guaranteed 9/10 of them want to fk you. Having all those orbitors introduces more risk for the a potential mate

Also, if all those guys friends is also met with you having few to no female friends, then that also says a lot about you since the most likely reason for you're inability to maintain friendships with other females is most likely the due to the other women not wanting you around their guys anymore because that also introduces unnecessary risk. The risk being that you showing signs of getting too close for comfort with their man

Miristheiss · Answer

I'd advise ANY man out there to never take a girl like this serious. If she has a throng of guys she hangs with all the time, goes out with, texts... etc. DO NOT EVER get serious with her. Never make her your girlfriend and never, ever marry her.

If you want to F her and mess around for a bit, I suppose but girlfriend?

No way.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Your mom is wrong.

If you have a lot of guy friends, but aren't dating/humping any of them, you're either a lesbian, or picky, and your definitely a "tomboy" mentally.

Picky women are the most trustworthy, and girls who aren't into "girly things" and prefer actual hobbies like gaming, science, sci-fi/fantasy, anime, tech, building stuff, making art or music, etc. are the best kind of women.

Starrrboy · Answer

As a guy you know what most guys are like ( even if you're not exactly like them ) , and also.. even if all her friends are cool dudes and they don't cross any lines.. she's still close with them in some way and they have her attention / she enjoys theirs... So , what makes you so different from these other guys? she just sleeps with you and not them? naaah doesn't feel good...

provokeesmokee · Answer

She grew up in a different time. Ignore her. That's internalized misogyny and unhealthy relationship patterns talking, no wisdom.

Spongebobssocks · Answer

I have two clearly non straight guy friends. But I don't know if I would be friends witb a straight guy.. although im ugly and I have morals so nothing would happen either way

Finchie40 · Answer

Because of temptations , usually opposite sex friends want more than just friendship happens with Guys and girls’ How would you feel if your boyfriend had a bunch of girl friends?

jshm2 · Answer

True. It could be taken by some guys as you being a "hoe" or as you being a flirt, milking guys. Depends on your personality I suppose.

Adaeva · Answer

Say what you wish but unless they are under 15 or over 60 they are more than friends and guys know that

Nikki1989 · Answer

She is old-fashioned. People are  not  insecure don't have those attitudes anymore, thankfully.

Apple1996 · Answer

I don't see the problem either. Most of my friends are guys and it's never caused any issues

Catarine · Answer

Men don't have woman friends unless they want to sleep with them

sheikalana · Answer

Because she's right. No guy wants to have a girlfriend that has a bunch of male friends. Men know how other men think.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Why are you flirting with a guy who is "just" a friend?

genericname85 · Answer

having mostly guy friends is definitely a huge red flag. not necesarily a "trust" thing but it's certainly unattractive.

ohmyguy · Answer

it's true.. If you trust... just don't do it make more sense to. not give a fuck than it is to. trust

OddBeMe · Answer

I don't know. I was a guy with tons of girls as friends. No girlfriends ironically. But I feel I learned so much about that species I was able to date easier in college.

AnusNdaPainus · Answer

Because if other women don’t like you it’s for a reason.  That’s a huge red flag when a girl has little to no female friends

BigDog1989 · Answer

The same reason that girls don't trust guys with a lot of girl "friends"

Anonymous · Answer

This is why. And every guy knows it but very few girls do.

no_feet_pics · Answer

Because all of those guys are more than likely waiting for their moment.

JesseP1nk · Answer

this.

Anonymous · Answer

Because your mom and guys knows if they're not hanging around for the free samples they're trying to😆

Guido · Answer

Only guys with jealousy issues won't trust you. And jealousy is a pretty common trait in young guys.

dolemite58 · Answer

cuz girls like that are usually huge attention whores

Anonymous · Answer

The problem is that you're 40 and still listening to your mom about dating advice! LMFAO!

soulOnDisplay · Answer

No, he shouldn't trust you.

krin_m · Answer

I don't see any problem TBH!

Anonymous · Answer

u don't trust your mom?

Vegasrunner · Answer

Yes, that's obvious.

Twalli · Answer

Generally guys befriend girls they want to date.

Drewtate · Answer

Absolutely true.

MaxUsefull · Answer

Because she is wise

boggboss · Answer

Are u really 40?

Anonymous · Answer

your 40 and still living with your mom

shades777 · Answer

obviously

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