Why would someone speak highly of a cheater?

[Anonymous]

I recently Joined a company in the development department and was assigned to 3 married supervisors of whom at least one is cheating with a married female coworker, let’s call her Ashley, he had been working with for about 10 years.

When I was working once with another coworker he went on and on about what a great person and family man this supervisor was and that all of them were like a close family and doing activities together after work with Ashley.

I’ve been there only 2 months and already picked up on the fact that they are having an affair. Why would this coworker who has known and worked with my supervisors not notice it after over 10 years? Or if he knows it, why would he go out of his way to praise him?

[spartan55]

So, you don't actually know they are having an affair, you are just speculating and presenting it as fact. Pretty irresponsible on your part.

[boggboss]

Because he either didn't know it was happening or knew butbdid it anyway thinking u didn't know

[Asker]

He must know I’m pretty sure. But why does he talk so highly of him if he knows? He could have talked about anything else but he chose to tell me what a great person he is

[boggboss]

How are u so sure he knows sorry

[Asker]

He works very closely with them and knows what they do after work together. You can’t hide an affair from someone you have been working with for 10 years. Even I have noticed it after 2 months and I haven’t been working that much with both of them. You can tell just by the body language and the listless Absent minded stares that they are horny for one another

[boggboss]

No because to know this would require u to spend time watching them where this guy might actually be doing his job and not focusing on them lol

[Asker]

He also flirts very openly with her in a sexy voice in front of other people and always tries to be alone with her. If I had been working with them for years I would have seen much more but atm I hardly talk to both of them and still see everything

[boggboss]

Thats because u are again watching them how do u know that this guy puts the same level of focus on them as u do

[Asker]

Im not even watching them ok? They are just super obvious about it. I can look at my screen and still hear them flirting. Also they work in a team together so you kind of have to watch them explain something. And when they do they always ignore everyone else on the room and just stare at each other

[boggboss]

It seems pretty clear that u spend quite a good amount of time focused on them but this is beside the point we have no clue if this guy actually knows if they are in a affire so it's nearly impossible to guess why he would make those comments if he made them genuinely or to fish to see what u would say or if he was being sarcastic its impossible to know

[Asker]

Yes because both of them are training me. Am I supposed to look at the ceiling when I’m in a meeting with them?

[Asker]

And he was not being sarcastic. He does admire both of them and also join them for afterwork activities

[boggboss]

If I take everything u say at 100 fact and truth clearly he has poor role modals and clearly sees nothing wrong with cheating and think he is an amazing man

[boggboss]

And that dont seem or sound reasonable so clearly somthing here is not adding up

[Anonymous]

He's probably a cheater himself, or he has bitter feelings towards women that he never dealt with. Also, he might have been cheated on.

[Asker]

If he had been cheated on why would he praise a cheating coworker? Doesn’t make sense to me. Also he doesn’t strike me as a cheater but of course that doesn’t mean anything

[Opinion Owner]

Because it made it feel bitter towards women in general.