Guys, Guys why would you want to remain friends with a girl after breaking up? Do you still care about her or are you just being polite?

[Anonymous]

Updates

7 mo

Why would a guy want to remain friends I guess is part of my question.

[Anonymous]

Well if he broke up w her chances are he’s just in it for something sexual. Because more than likely if he initiated the breakup up chances are she didn’t want the same. So he can play on her emotions by acting like he wants her back, possibly getting her to have sex w him or a blowjob. Now if she broke up w him chances are it’s more genuine that he still really wants to be w her. So if he really can’t have her at least he’s thinking I can have her as a friend, maybe things will change and she will come back.

[236color]

If I broke up with her, no I don't want to remain friends. The best I can do is not actively hate you. If it will make you go away, I will tell you "We're still friends" if you've got to hear it to make you feel like it's not your fault, but that doesn't mean I don't think it was your fault. In fact, if you felt it definitely was my fault, you wouldn't WANT to think of me as still your friend.

[mattla]

No. Simply that’s a big no-no. When it’s a casual thing - sure, whatever. But if it was something serious - nope. When this happens it usually means they either weren’t invested, are treating it as a fallback plan or they still love the girl and are hoping for a comeback at some point

[Asker]

Thanks for the insight. I broke up with him and he seemed to really want to stay at least friends and comfort me going through a hard time and said how great I am.

[mattla]

In that case numero 3 then. It’s a waste of time for him and you in either case usually, plus it can lead to drama for you. And if you had good reasons for breaking up - keep it that way. Additionally if you wanna do a good thing - make it clear to him that it’s over and he shouldn’t expect anything in the future. Whether or not he listens to you - thats on his end

[Asker]

We didn’t actually officially date or anything just we talked for a while and we’re friends with benefits but I basically wanted to end things and his response was to at least be friends. So this tells me he thought we were more before? I don't know

[mattla]

Oh okay. Well in that case you can’t really call this a breakup, can you? It was just a natural end to a casual thing. Whether or not he wanted more - only you can tell because there aren’t any specific details being shared. But if you have that hunch then it’s probably true 🤷🏻‍♂️. But of course if he wasn’t the one who ended it then he wouldn’t be very happy about it - would he?

[Asker]

Well he did tell me he thinks I’m great and went on about how pretty and sweet I am, and mentioned we have chemistry.
So I was confused.

[Asker]

He’s done nice things for me before like I dropped something and it went everywhere and he picked every piece of it up for me.
He told me the last time we stopped talking too he felt confused and hurt.

[mattla]

There you go. No one does these things when it’s just friends with benefits. You just answered your own question 🙃

[Asker]

So you think he likes me?

[mattla]

He’s either really cheesy or he really likes you and he wanted more from you

[DarkWinterNights]

You can go from friends to relationship, but not from relationship back to friends. Even if you have good intentions to try to be on good terms, I’ve never felt the desire to hang out with someone I broke up with.

[dudeinohio]

No. She'd be ancient history. Goodbye for ever.

[Asker]

What makes you feel that way?

[dudeinohio]

Because they are in the past. Always look. forward.

Also, when I get into a new relationship, the new person may dislike the fact I'm friends with an ex.

[In_Trance]

I would not