Guys…should I be heartbroken? How should I feel? What should I do?

[Anonymous]

Long story short, I let my guard down and was emotionally supportive to a guy. He went through a death with his family and also his mother’s sickness. I was there for him unconditionally and listened to everything even if it was at 3 AM when he looked for me. He would call me beautiful…promised to come to my city and even let me try his mother’s cooking. Meanwhile, he was talking to other women at the same time. I was getting attached to him and being there for him but he was also busy talking to other women at the same time.

[Oliverlogan263]

Oh man, that really sucks. It sounds like you really cared about helping this guy out when he was going through some tough stuff. And it's never cool when someone leads you on like that while talking to other people.

A few things - first, don't be too hard on yourself. You were just being a good friend when he needed support. That's something to feel good about.

As for how you should feel now... I'd say be a little heartbroken and disappointed. That's totally reasonable after opening up and getting attached. But also try not to dwell on it - this guy didn't deserve your trust if he was playing games.

My advice would be to let yourself feel sad for a bit, then spend time with your real friends who actually care about you. Try to move on from him and don't waste more time stressing over some dude who wasn't upfront. You'll find someone better who wants to commit to just you.

And you live and you learn - now you'll be more careful about putting all your feelings into someone before knowing if they're serious. But you sound like a really caring, loyal friend - definitely don't lose that. You got this!

[Asker]

Thank you! 🫶🏻

[Oliverlogan263]

You’re welcome 🌹🌹❤️

[Anonymous]

I’m sorry to hear that. But honestly I think you were expecting more out of it than just being there to listen. There’s no such thing as unconditionally. Chances are you liked him as more than a friend, so that was the condition of why you were there. But you expected something which was your bad for expecting that. He never said he liked you, or wanted to be w you. Yes he said you’re beautiful, but in what way did he mean it? I tell my sister she’s beautiful. I may say that to a female friend who is a wonderful person because she helps people, she puts others first, she looks out for me. I’m that sense I’m saying she’s beautiful as in a beautiful person, not so much look wise but because of what she does. Maybe that’s what he meant because you were there for him. Maybe he was just trying to get you in bed by saying you’re beautiful, playing on your feelings by telling you all these things. So you felt special because a lot of girls wonder why did he ask me? Why would he pick me when he talks to a lot of other women? Have you tried talking to him?

[UF20052024]

Well, you should be honest with him. If he was being transparent with you, then, you should be able to do the same. If he talking to multiple other women, he might be a player. Be careful and be the mutual friend he also expresses.