How can I make him stop?

Question

My boyfriend gets upset coz i have celebrities crushes and i comment stuff like ( handsome - gorgeous - sexy)
He went to my following on Instagram and start stalking the pages and every pic see if i comment, he asked me to stop even tho i told him "it doesn't mean anything u r making a big deal out of nothing and u invaded my privacy but stalking me like that ans nobody even see these comments" i know he is insecure and he says i hurt him! I don't want him to control me
but i can't understand him?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I can understand both sides. But what’s more important to you? Him? Or celebrities who more than likely will never pick you considering how many options they have? If it’s not a big deal then it should be easy for you to quit. It’s not about him controlling you either. It’s about your love for him, respect, not making him feel insecure. Sounds like he needs to work on his confidence more, but until then you need to try to help him alleviate that. One of the biggest things to men in a relationship is respect. Right now you’re showing a lack of it. So I wouldn’t be surprised if this relationship doesn’t workout. Women who don’t respect their men tend to cheat or leave. You sound like the man in this relationship, and that won’t last.

madhatters4 · Accepted Answer

i can understand both sides. i think a compromise needs to be reached. if you know something makes him insecure why continue doing it? is it necessary? is it more important to comment on other people's physical appearances than maintain a healthier relationship?

on the other hand, he needs to gain confidence taht your appreciation of another physical body doesn't mean you feel less about him.

so can you both agree to work on yourselves? him becoming more secure in your feelings for him AND you helping by speaking less about other's appearance

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I think it can come across as disrespectful towards your relationship. I know they are just celebrities but it’s kinda embarrassing to have your SO commenting on other people’s pages simping over them. Same goes for guys who are in relationships that comment “beautiful!” and stuff on IG models’ pics. When you’re in a relationship you are still allowed to find other people attractive but you should keep your opinions to yourself to respect your partner.

HelpfulWoman · Accepted Answer

if it "means nothing" why can't you just stop?
Frankly it sounds very very cringey. Yes, all he can do to is to only ask you.
But he's also telling you he's uncomfortable with it, and you're brushing that off because you want to leave random comments? I hope he sees the red flag

YesterdaysChild · Answer

Instagram is mostly for people seeking attention or validation. Do you really feel the need to be on it? If someone has a concern, even if petty, you should address it. If you are more interested in if the people on Instagram see your comments than if your boyfriend gets miffed by it, then maybe your relationship has run its course and you should move on. I'm sure if he was the one making eyes at the girls on Instagram you would probably feel the same.

🤔😕

CupcakeTheDestroyer · Answer

I can understand where you’re coming from with this, and this is a result of his insecurity, but I think you’re in a place where you need to ask yourself if the relationship is worth it anymore because pretty much everyone here is going to say you need to leave him or he needs to leave you

jahaims · Answer

Having preferences and standards isn't insecure or controlling. You guys just have different preferences. You are an adult. It is weird and immature to post those kind of comments on a strangers social media.

FunkyMonkee · Answer

Time to leave!! He sounds psychotic and might become dangerous in the future! You might end up with more than scars on your SOUL!

How can I make him stop?

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