Hi everyone, I just met this guy recently, we went on a couple dates and had a fantastic time and we are discussing future plans months ahead to visit each other (we live a bit far from each other - different countries). He is traveling right now, and hasn't been messaging me for about 1-2 days at a time, then responding back saying he apologizes, hopes I am well, and that he has been insanely busy traveling. I can't help but feel like if someone is interested, they would still message even if they are busy? Or am I wrong, maybe thinking too much into it? I am busy too with work, so I understand the busy-ness but there are some down time points: when I wake up, going to bed, lunch break, etc. where I can check in and say hello. I feel like it may be too early to make a demand for more frequent contact, but I would like to have even a simple hello or have a good day, every day. He seems interested, and I understand his schedule but I am unsure what to think because it is an odd situation I haven't been in before. Advice for me? Thanks
Should I be concerned that he doesn't text every day?
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So honestly, I am all about one or two texts a day. But this is a dangerous road to go down. What's wrong with a daily text just to say good morning and good night. NOTHING!
How long are you being left on read, because seriously nobody is too busy to read your text and say... I am busy but I hope you have a good day. Talk to you soon.
I mean you are just starting out on this relationship, and there is time and distance involved and this is when he is supposed to be putting his best foot forward. But you are feeling that maybe he is not, and if this how he is now... what's the expectations for the future?
Now to me sending a good morning text or good night text... that's not real texting to me. But if are sending more than one or two texts a day... then yeah back off. But if you are sending one or two text and there days in-between it only means one thing.
1. Your more into him then he is into you.
2. He is playing games.
3. He is seriously that busy and that is not really working for you.
Honestly, I am more in line with Number 1. Nobody is that busy to completely blow you off for days. Number 2 is not good either, like is trying to play it off as a way of trying to make you miss him more, and why? But this way playing games like that is not a good idea.
And number 3 is most important thing. Because number 3 is all about how he is making you feel about yourself. And over time that can put you into a bad place mentally.
I have been stuck in this dilemma before. were you have this date planned... but in between dates it's pretty icy cold. And you want to talk about it with them, but you do not want to do it through text over the phone... but there is so much time in between in person meets. that you never get a real chance to talk to them. But when you are together you just want to enjoy your time together, so you avoid the hard discussions.
Over time you're in this constant state of self-doubt, and it all stems back to them just not sending a short text back. Its rude, its insensitive and it is not right.
My advice is don’t force daily communications. Instead keep planning weekly dates. Even if you are not in the same country, you can set aside a few hours on a Friday night. Get creative with the dates. But that’s better than every day at lunch just checking in for 3 text messages
that would concern me