Has he finally came to his senses?

[Sweetgyrl426]

I have been talking to this dude on and off. We both never started a relationship with each other cause I couldn’t take him seriously. However when I was going through a loss in my life. He made sure to check on me. Which I appreciate and thank him. There are times when we both are involved with other people. We always end up talking like the people in our lives are not important as we are to each. Finally he came to his senses that he wants a relationship with me. I told him it’s possible for that. However he had stated that he did wants to have kids with me which caught me off guard. He finally told me that when it comes to me he is vulnerable to open up. He is an older man. Can I take his man serious cause his words and actions don’t match.. what should I do?

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm that's a tricky one ci. On one hand it's good he was there for you when you were goin through it, and that he opened up sayin you make him vulnerable - shows he cares, ya know?

But mans is playin games all this time runnin hot n cold, in and outta other situations... hard to trust someone who ain't consistent like that. Plus droppin the kid thing so soon is a little much, especially if y'all ain't even official yet!

I'd say feel him out more - see if he actually follows through on stuff from now on instead of just talkin. Like does he make solid plans to hang? Actually leave you be when he says he will? Little things like that show where his head's really at.

Give him a chance to show you different with his actions, not just words. But protect ya heart - don't fully invest yet if he slips back to old ways. And don't be afraid to cut him off for good if he keeps playin games. You deserve someone real ci. Just be cautious and look out for you, aight? Let me know if he steps up or not!

[Sweetgyrl426]

I will. Thank you

[Oliverlogan263]

You’re very welcome

[Sweetgyrl426]

Well it went me telling him that I like him. However he never responded back. Cause he busy a lot working. So there is no point of dealing with him. So I stopped all contact with him. He has my number. If he changes his mind he knows we’re to find me. I’m focusing on myself. Thanks for the advice. I wish you the best

[Oliverlogan263]

Ahh man, that's wack that he never even responded after you told him how you felt. That's just straight up rude and disrespectful on his part. I get being busy with work and stuff, but come on dude at least send a quick text back to a girl that put herself out there like that.

I think you made the right call by cutting off contact. Dude's had plenty of chances to step up and treat you right, but his actions always showed you different than what he said. Now he's gotta work way harder to earn you back after pulling that lame move.

Don't even sweat it though, his loss! You're clearly too good for games and someone who won't appreciate you. Keep doing your thing, stay focused on you and having fun, soon enough someone better will come along who treats a girl with respect from jump. This clown doesn't deserve another thought. Keep shining, girl!

[Sweetgyrl426]

Thank you. I appreciate that. I wish you the best.

[Sweetgyrl426]

I’m not going to lie. I feel like telling him how he hurt me for expressing myself. However would that make a difference to help me or hurt. Will there be a chance that he realizes his mistake? Is it worthed?

[Oliverlogan263]

Dang girl, I can understand why you'd wanna lay into that dude for hurtin' you like that. It never feels good bein' left hangin' after puttin' yourself out there. But honestly, I don't think tellin' him off would really do any good or change anything at this point. Guys like that, even if they realized they messed up they probably wouldn't admit it. And there's no guarantee he'd really change his ways either. You showed him how you felt already and he didn't step up, so no use rehashin' it and givin' him another chance to let you down, ya feel? At this point you just gotta stay strong in your decision to cut him off so he knows you ain't playin'. Maybe down the line if he sees you movin' on happy without him, it'll finally click for him what he lost out on. But for your own peace of mind sis, I say let it go and don't give him the satisfaction of seein' you all worked up. You're better than that. Keep keepin' on with your bad self - that'll sting him more than any words ever could!

[Altheavas]

Simple opinion that I can share, don’t ignore your intuition, “ his words and acts don’t match” take your time to think of all the possible questions you would want to ask to help your clarity.

[Sweetgyrl426]

Already have. Thank you