Why am I so unfortunate when it comes to love?

Question

(English isn't my first language please be kind, and this is more like a rant)

I'm 19 never had a boyfriend, been asked out once, liked a few guys before but they all either rejected me or rejected and played me at the same time. I'm very lonely actually. You might say " you're so shallow. Why would you care about having boyfriends or not when you're so young? Just focus on yourself" cuz that's what everyone told me whenever I tried telling them this. If focusing on myself for 19 years is still not enough I don't know how much more time I have to do it. It sucks, especially when everyone else around you is dating but you. I started college earlier this year, and ended up liking another guy. I was hopeful with this one. Unlike those crushes I had, I actually feel it in my guts that this one likes me back. He steals glances at me a lot (not more than me OFC), and it doesn't happen for every girl in the class ( ik cuz I look across at him too much during class). Sometimes he purposely stared at me to get my attention, so I'd end up smiling at him. One time the class was divided into 5 groups. My group was seated next to his. Him and I was not in a setting where we'd be facing each other at all. But he whipped his head, and looked straight at me at least twice, and when I smiled at him, he'd shyly smile to himself then quickly looked away every time. One time he chose to join my discussion group (keep in mind that we don't sit near each other). During the discussion, our feet accidentally touched but instead of sliding it away, he kept it there for a good 5mns. That's why I thought he likes me but he never really made a move, which is odd. Today I found his FB. I was about to add him but then something else caught my eyes " In a relationship since November 2021". What's wrong with me? Am I walking around with a sign on my head that says " available for emotional torture " or something? This isn't even the worst part, the worst part is I LIKE HIM MORE THAN JUST A CRUSH!

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

Welp it seems maybe you wear your heart on your sleeve which can be a good and bad thing, although it's never a bad thing to be hopeful and you should be hopeful even if it doesn't work out cause that hope is what will eventually assure you find what you seek, giving up only assures the opposite, it seems that maybe he's not interested cause he's in a relationship but your interest flattered him which is a good thing, I don't say you should just focus on yourself if you badly want a partner but I would say seek elsewhere because you'd have a better chance finding it when people are single, if anything take his reaction as a compliment and see the bright side in it, his flattery most likely means you are possibly attractive and your interest was a compliment to him, which will surely help on your search.

laly520 · Answer

u don't go after taken guys then wonder why u aren't fortunate when it comes to love
u gotta sit down n think deeply about what u really want, define ur feelings cuz not any could be love so u may have fallen into lust or just like em n thats it
if u get uncertain thinking of all of this then u def need more time on ur own to figure it all about before thinking about getting into any relationship with anyone

Anonymous · Answer

So this is about you wanting a guy who is already taken? Well he is already in a relationship. Look for men who are already single at your school and should be successful at some point.

Why am I so unfortunate when it comes to love?

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