I went on a couple dates with a guy and they both went really well. During our first date conversation he got really deep and personal. He talked to me about how he views life, his mother passing away and his experience taking care of her, etc. the following day he asked and scheduled a second date. Three days later we had been texting consistently and around 10pm he suggested that I come over to his house. I lightheartedly told him that I wasn’t going to go to his house. He then said he was “just joking” (definitely not). Our second date went really well too. Towards the end of the date he asked to see me again, which I agreed to. We kissed goodbye and I lightheartedly told him not to ask me to come over at 10pm again. He smiled and said that he wouldn’t. He told me to text him when I got home. I did and he told me that he had a really good time with me. It’s now been over two days and he hasn’t contacted me, which seems out of character because he had been texting me every day, even during his hectic work days that ended late.
Should I assume he was just looking for sex and realized after our second date that it wasn’t going to happen right away so he lost interest? If not, how many days of not hearing from him should I no longer want to pursue anything with him?
28 d
The guy I went on a second date with hasn’t contacted me in 3 days. Is he not interested?
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2Opinion
You are right with your assumption.
The guy was solely interested in fornicating with you and when he realized that you were not playing his game, he lost interest. Needless to say that you are not losing anything by not going on a third date because he will surreptitiously try again to motivate you to go to his place.
Men like that are players and have absolutely no intention to start a relationship. Once they copulated with their victims, they move onto the next potential candidate.
Your best option is really to forget this loser and to remove him from your social media or contacts.
To be fair, all men are looking for sex. I can appreciate where you're coming from by asserting your limits, but it may be that the guy in question found what he was looking for elsewhere. Also there's the possibility that something drastic happened in his life, and that you all are not exactly close enough for him to involve you in whatever the crisis/situation is. You should not turn down any opportunity for happiness in the meantime.
Should I reach out via text or should I wait and see if he gets back within the next couple of days?
he is not, yeah