Why Would He Say This?

[Anonymous]

(Race based question) I'm a black female my boyfriend is white he often says this that are quite racist but he told me that black women wear wigs bc we want to be white so I ditched the wig and been wearing my afro and he still pushes it. Why is he doing this?

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, that is not okay at all. No guy should be putting down your race or making racist "jokes."

It sounds like some deeper issues on his part, probably stemming from insecurity or ignorance. But either way, you don't deserve that disrespect about who you are.

My advice would be to have a serious talk with him. Calm but firm, let him know comments about race are off limits, and it's hurting your relationship. Watch his reaction closely - if he gets defensive or doesn't see the problem, that's not a good sign.

You want a man proud of you just as you are. Don't change yourself for anyone! If he can't accept you fully, don't settle for less sis. You deserve someone who loves your natural gorgeous self. His issues aren't your burden to bear.

Stay strong and surround yourself with people who uplift your spirit! Hope it works out - keep me posted ok? You got this 💪🏽

[DannyUk2017]

Sounds like either he doesn't know what he is talking/thinking about... or he fantasized about a black woman and he is not "pleasantly" surprised... or you're Way out of his league...🤷‍♂️

[Cristinaissweet]

That's not racist. I'm black and don't find that offensive.