Does this guy at work like me?

Question

I've been working this food service job for 6 months now. I'm very quiet and keep to myself, but am kind to others and a hard worker. There's a guy at my job who is favored by all who work there. Pretty much like a town celebrity. I started noticing he was throwing passive-aggressive comments my way while talking to other people when I'm around. I never did anything to him to cause him to do this, but this does happen to me a lot due to my quiet nature, so I didn't give it any attention and continued to work. One day I was working and a couple of male coworkers came up to me and started talking to me, then out of nowhere he pops up and makes this veiled threat towards me."She's the type that doesn't like to approach, but if I get people to stop talking to her, maybe then she'll approach" Naturally I didn't want my reputation to be put at risk bc I actually like this job, so I started saying hi to him each day after that despite how awkward it was for me. One day I mustered up the courage to tap his shoulder and let him know it wasn't my intention to rub him the wrong way. That it was just how I was, and sometimes I don't know the right timing in when to say hi to others. He told me that I was good and since then he's been saying hi to me as well. One day he came in with a hair cut that everyone was gushing over him for. I smiled and said hi, and he greeted me as well, but this time, he smiled and held my gaze. It was prolonged to the point where it was almost hypnotic. I was flustered bc I didn't expect him to do that. He hasn't done so since then, and averts his gaze sometimes when talking to me, which makes me think he hates me. He hovers around me a lot when I'm taking customers orders and he helps me out with their orders secretly. He does it in a sneaky way, but I always notice. He can talk to anyone but he's quiet around me. He sometimes asks me how I'm doing, if I took my break yet or tells me he's going to help me out with something. What do you think?

Oliverlogan263 · Accepted Answer

Woah, that's a lot going on with this guy from your work! Based on everything you've described, it definitely sounds like he might have a bit of a crush on you, girl.

Let's break it down:
- The passive-aggressive comments when you're around, then the veiled threat about getting people to stop talking to you - that's a pretty messed up way to try and get your attention. Dude's clearly got some issues.
- The fact that he made the effort to let you know it was okay and you didn't mean to rub him the wrong way, and now he's making more of an effort to say hi, is a good sign.
- The prolonged eye contact and smiling at you is a pretty obvious flirtation tactic. He's trying to get you flustered.
- Him hovering around you, helping out with your orders, and asking about your breaks - those are little ways he's trying to spend more time with you and be helpful.
- And the fact that he's quieter around you compared to how he is with everyone else is another sign he's nervous/interested.

So yeah, girl, I think this guy definitely has a thing for you. He's going about it in a pretty immature and passive-aggressive way, but the signs are all there. Dude's into you.

The question is, how do you feel about him? If you're interested too, maybe try flirting back a little and see how he responds. But if not, you gotta be careful and maybe set some boundaries, 'cause he seems a little intense.

Either way, just be cautious and trust your gut. Don't feel pressured to reciprocate if you're not feeling it. Focus on doing your job well and keeping things professional. Hopefully he'll get the hint if you don't encourage his advances.

Let me know if you need any other advice, sis! Navigating workplace crushes can be tricky, but you got this.

Cormac995 · Accepted Answer

The part where he is sneakily helping you is the dead ringer that he likes you because he's doing something nice, he's trying to hide. That comes from a place of a selfless gesture he would only do that if he liked you because he's going out of his way to help you without even considering getting a thanks as a reward. That means from his perspective its more important you get helped then he gets credit for doing it. Those are gestures of genuine affection at the very least he's very fond of you and to me it sounds like he has a pretty big crush.