Silvester Date, what happened?

[Anonymous]

Me and a Guy (38) i have known for 2 years ( friends with benefits kind of no sex just bj before) didn't have plans for new years so we agreed to go to the movies and downtown. He is leaving the country for good in 2 month.

We usually make out at the movies but not this time. We went to dinner and during dinner he said i think im gonna take off after this. He paid for everything and we left. Remember it was new years eve 9 pm. And he has a drive of 1 h 30 min home

I was in freeze mode and didn't say anything. I just told him you know this is not okay now i have 2 hours left to find something to do and my friends were working that night, he knew that.

He said happy new year but i just drove off

At home i texted and asked why he left. He said: i dont think it matters to you why i left. Later he said: when we sat down at the restaurant and we started talking more it just got me thinking. I dont want to lead you on. With me ultimately leaving. Especially if we would have gotten intimate. It wouldn't be right.

Just arguing back and forth from my end then. I told him i didn't expect anything and its fucked up to do that to someone on new years that is supposedly a friend. I think i was more upset because of that fact😔.

I couldnt keep my cool that night and did say mean things. He said okay then. We can Just say goodbye and not talk anymore. No good will come from that and im not entertaining this conversation anymore.

I replied with Based. Its just fucked up to pull something like that when you are supposedly friends.

No more texting after that. Im really hurt and i Wish i would have kept my cool but was all alone at home on nye and would have planned something ele otherwise.

Am i wrong to feel upset and what happens here in you guys opinion.

Thanks x

Updates

1 y

English is my second language. Please excuse any grammar mistakes

[Oliverlogan263]

Aw man, that sounds like a really tough and awkward situation. I can totally understand why you're feeling so upset about how your New Year's Eve date went down.

It sucks that he just kind of dipped out on you at the restaurant without much explanation. That had to have felt really crappy, especially since you were left without any plans for the rest of the night. I'd be pissed too if I was in your shoes.

It seems like he was trying to avoid leading you on or getting too intimate, since he's leaving the country soon. But the way he went about it was just really inconsiderate and kind of a jerk move, especially on New Year's Eve.

I don't blame you at all for getting upset and saying some harsh things in the moment. When you're feeling hurt and disappointed like that, it's hard to keep your cool. You had every right to be upset that he just ditched you like that.

At the same time, I can see where he was coming from too, even if he handled it really poorly. He probably didn't want to start something with you that he knew wouldn't last. But he should have been more upfront about his concerns instead of just bailing.

Ultimately, I don't think you're wrong to feel upset about it. He's the one who messed up by not communicating better and just leaving you stranded. Even if you two aren't together, he should have at least made sure you had a way to still enjoy your night.

I hope you were still able to find something fun to do, even if it was last-minute. And don't be too hard on yourself for losing your temper a bit - that's a totally understandable reaction. Just focus on taking care of yourself now.

If he reaches out again, you can decide if you even want to keep him in your life. But for now, try not to dwell on it too much. You deserve way better than that, girl.

[Ariesman81]

Yeah... rejection hurts. Dude just wasn't feeling it anymore.

[Flower7]

You are right to feel upset by his flakiness and wasting of your time. I hope you continue to keep him out of your life and don’t communicate with him again.

[Nikki1989]

Some men are flaky. All talk and no action. Move on.

[In_Trance]

Move on