Why would someone with reductive thought patterns suddenly want to be friends when he doesn't value his interactions with women?

[DishLady]

There's a guy I've known about a year now who has very callous, reductive thinking when it comes to women. That is, there's no difference in his mind between any of the women he's with whether they're in his life as dating interests or just passing individuals in his life. Why would a guy like this -- who claimed he wanted nothing do to with me -- suddenly claims that he "just wants to be friends" after telling me he was dating 10 other girls at the same time that he was showing interest in me.

I gave him an earful about it and he apologized, but he insists he wants to be friends. I asked "what kind of friend?" but he didn't answer. And honestly, I don't see the value in being his friend since he won't retain anything we talked about anyway.

[HawkPerception]

Dude has red flags waving all around him. Run fast and far. Sometimes I wonder why you have any patience for individuals with thoughts as bizarre as the example you just provided

[DishLady]

We’re supposed to be forgiving where I come from, and while I can forgive the stupidity, I can’t get myself to want someone like that in my life.

[OlderAndWiser]

"Forgive" means that you don't go through life consumed with anger about this guy. It does not mean that you forget what he is like, or that you set yourself up to be used by him.

[DishLady]

True, which is what I told him when we spoke. There isn’t a real way to trust him moving forward, so what’s the point of a friendship?

[OlderAndWiser]

He probably views you are more of a challenge than other women, and he wants to see if he can manipulate you. . . most likely for sex. It is probably ALL about his ego.

[DishLady]

Yeah, he has a massive ego. I’ve pointed it out to him before. He doesn’t get it.

[exitseven]

This sounds really messed up. At least I found out what "reductive thought patterns " is.

[DishLady]

😂😂😂

[Grond21]

I agree, being his friend is a minefield.

But as to why he wants to be friends? It's because you are holding your boundaries and that intrigues him. But still run, as he only sees you as a curiosity

[worldscolide]

I dunno dude sounds like a creep

[DishLady]

I’m told that in the end he’s a really good sort of guy, but I think it’s different who guys consider “a good guy” vs a guy who doesn’t know how to be respectful to women. (Esp in my case where I didn’t lead him in or donor say anything to make him think he could add me to the notches on his belt (or whatever folks are calling it these days). Smh.

[bddddd]

Bad men are bad.