"Doesn’t Need an Excuse" Is an Excuse

[Anonymous]

Two years ago, Maria Kang posted a photo of herself with her three children. The image featured her toned midriff and one question: “What’s your excuse?” The motive for the image was to motivate other mothers to make it a priority to be active.

Instead of applauding a mom who is proud of her body, who made it a priority to do what it takes to become confident and healthy, some women took offense. They accused Maria Kang of “fat-shaming” and setting unideal expectations for women. The result? A campaign entitled “Doesn’t Need an Excuse,” which featured moms who didn’t have time to exercise or eat right because they were too busy changing the world.

The “Doesn’t Need an Excuse” campaign that followed Kang’s “No Excuse Mom” movement is disheartening. A confident woman who is proud enough to flaunt her accomplishment - whatever that may be - is rare. So why are these women so critical?

Kang never said that all moms should look like her or spend as much time exercising as she does. In my opinion, her goal was to motivate - to help us, moms, realize that our health is in our hands, and no matter how busy we are, we should make it a priority to be healthy.

So to the critical moms out there, I have four questions:

1. What’s wrong with celebrating another woman’s achievements, even if what’s important to her isn’t important to you?


2. What’s wrong with teaching our children to value their health?


3. What’s wrong with showing our children that we have to power to become who we want to be?


4. Aren’t we as parents supposed to lead by example after all?

[loveisbeautiful]

We can all bury our heads in the sand and pretend she's trying to "empower women", but that's not what she was trying to do. All you have to do is look at that picture and see her in her short shorts and sports bra and showing off her abs, to know she was just trying to show off. The saddest part is, is that she's using her children as props in a lame attempt to show "she has time to workout and be a great mom". I mean, all you have to do is look at that picture and see that she's trying to show off how hot she is and adds "what's your excuse", because she wonders why other women aren't as hot as her. It's an attempt to show off, not empower women.

Also, I'm so tired of people talking about "eating right and exercising". I think I eat right, but other people would disagree because if you're not eating tofu or a carrot like Bugs Bunny, you're apparently not eating right and that's not. right. As for exercise, has anybody stop to think that maybe, just maybe, some of these women can't actually work out? Or maybe, just maybe, they put themselves on the back burner because they think taking of their spouse and children is more important and makes them happier then looking hot and having abs? People might want to think about that, instead of judging a woman who doesn't have a "hot body" after having a child. Just saying.

[myTake Owner]

So you are saying women who choose to show off what they're proud of are not empowering, but women who (in your words) choose to "put themselves on the back burner because they think taking [care] of their spouse and children is more important" are?

I'm a mom and a runner. I enjoy running because it's something I can do with my family. I can jog with the stroller to the playground. I can run along while my kids ride their bikes. I can run anytime - it can be 10 minutes here and 20 minutes there. It all adds up. When I run long distances, I tend to wear short shorts and yes, sometimes I'm just in my sports bra. It's not because I want to show off. It's because it gets hot when you run. Men are allowed to run shirtless without judgement, right?

I don't believe Kang's question is judgmental at all. It's just telling the women who aren't happy with themselves and want to be more healthy that it's not impossible. What's wrong with that?

[loveisbeautiful]

What's wrong is the way she went about it. It comes off as her showing off, not trying to help women.

[The_Eternal_Emperor]

Yeah, I agree. There really is no excuse for letting yourself go and becoming overweight. My mom works full-time and raised 4 children at the same time, and yet she still manages to find time to exercise daily and eat healthy food.

[inamorata]

Same with my mum. In her fifties and looks like a hot 30-year-old because of how she took care of her body.

[NotJustAnotherGuy]

People, at large, are extremely stupid. Listen to the top 5% of the nation, not just what's said more. Fat people are fat because they've convinced themselves they're okay enough with it that they're not gonna do that incredibly hard thing called exercise. Fat people who hate being fat more than they hate exercise, aren't fat for long. It's not a complicated mental problem.. work out and don't eat like a cow. Everyone knows how to do it, not everyone does it.

The women responding are incredibly stupid and lazy. I can list out tiny parts of my year and make myself sound incredibly involved too.

I'm an assistant Speech coach, Speech Judge, and tabulator for tournaments. I volunteer at the House for Little Wanderers, do various charitable 5Ks, volunteer for Relay for Life, I also work 12-16 hour shifts, I'm an advocate for improving education, I workout 4x a week for 1-2 hours and stretch for 30 minutes a day... and despite that being 100% true and how that sounds like I have no time in my day.. I'm currently caught up on literally 30 tv series and play a crap ton of video games.

These responses are just a bunch of lazy fat people, who pretend they have no time. The reality is, you can do a lot in a day. And I don't know any fat person in my life, who doesn't have a butt load of free time. You wouldn't be fat if you were working/volunteering all day, every day. Anyone who works 12 hour shifts in manual labor knows it's hard to find time to eat when you're busy and that in itself thins you out. So if you're fat-- you ain't that busy!

Maria Kang is right. You can have a kid, a job, a life and be fit. Let alone have a kid, a job, a life and just not be disgustingly fat.

Fat-shaming is good moral behavior. People shouldn't be fat. Advocating it as okay, is immoral. It is good and right to actively discourage the use of drugs, violence, promiscuity and self harm-- which is exactly what being obese is.

[Hannah591]

I like how they make out Maria to be a bad person by plonking in the "organising multicultural learning activities", "homeschools special needs child" etc. on the others like if you're interested in fitness, you're not a good person or Maria doesn't do anything other than fitness and looking after her children.

There's nothing wrong with it and I applaud Maria for her accomplishments. I'm not a mum but I'm pretty damn busy, many people have commented on it, yet I make time for exercise even when I'm not up to it. I went to kickboxing last week with two bad knees!

There was outcry about this on Reddit.
https://imgur.com/JqLrZOq
www.bodybuilding.com/.../...ia-kang-interview.html

There is a part of Reddit which points out the hypocrisy some overweight people have and how they expect everyone to change their view of overweight people, instead of them lose weight for their own health. They feel it's acceptable to insult skinny people, telling them to eat more but god forbid you told them to eat less, it would be deemed "fat shaming".

[Anonymous]

1. We should be able to celebrate another woman's achievement! That is great that Maria Kang did what she wanted and was so motivated! However, her campaign seemed to "attack" the women who aren't as muscular as her, so those women got defensive and created the "doesn't need an excuse" campaign. Kang said, "what's your excuse?" and they gave her an answer. I think if Kang's image instead said something like "I did it!" then we might be able to celebrate her achievement more.
2. There is nothing wrong with teaching our children to value our health! But anyone who thinks that "being healthy" = "looking like Maria Kang" has a warped idea of health. You can have fat on your body and still have a totally healthy and normal body fat percentage. In fact, women are actually built to have more fat than men. Kang is very fit and she looks great, but you can still be healthy without looking exactly like her.
3. Nothing wrong with showing our children that we have the power to become who we want to be. That's why I think Kang's campaign would have been received better if she phrased it differently. Instead of alienating anyone who doesn't work out, she should have phrased it more in the terms of "I set a goal for myself, and I stuck to it, and I accomplished my goal!" Then I think more people would get behind it.
4. Yes, parents are supposed to lead by example. Kang is an example of getting fit after working out. Kang is an example of setting a goal and sticking to it. But the other mothers are setting great examples for their kids too! The 2nd mom homeschools special needs kids, she is an example of helping other people! She volunteers for dog rescue, she is an example of being kind to animals and volunteering your time! So yes, I think Kang is a great role model for her kids. But the other moms are role models too.

[RalphBlack]

Yeah... now days it's easy for one to share their opinions and they have more freedom of choice.
But with this freedom that we continually recieve is also making us like undisciplined children who get their feelings hurt on such a simple little thing. This little three worded sentence was supposed reach out to encourage women to be motivated.
I doubt by all means that this lady would go out of her way to be mean to overweight mothers.
And it most likely wasn't just her that wrote the vague little quote that was suppose to make them think, "Well y'know? She's right! I am kinda fat aren't I? I need to do something about it."

[RalphBlack]

That kid with the striped shirt obviously was forced to smile and be in the picture.
Look at how awkward he feels knowing that the Maria Kang is right.
He probably went to school the next day after her meme went viral on tumblr and got tormented by the other classmates

[nemer26]

I think it's perfectly OK to applaud other moms for their accomplishments. I think instead of the question being "What's your excuse?" It should've been "look what I accomplished.." We're in constant competition with other women. It's so frustrating. While I think what she did is great, it's not for everyone. Other people have different priorities. I don't find their reasoning to be excuses. I have taken steps to lead a healthier lifestyle and it's tough when you work 40 plus hours and take care of kids. We have such unrealistic expectations for others just because we think our way is the best way.

[miserybusiness]

I was typing out pretty much the exact same response and then I read your comment and realized how redundant my opinion would be. Haha. I agree with you! What Maria did is great and all for HERSELF - but that isn't necessarily what other women want or prioritize.

[HaventMetYouYet]

Totally agree! I totally think it should have been "look what I accomplished." And just because the women aren't as fit as her, it doesn't mean they're unhealthy. Like you said, it's tough when you're so busy but you can still take steps to a healthier lifestyle without working out and looking like Maria. I don't have time to work out so I don't have a lot of muscle, but I eat healthy food.

[Anonymous]

I think it's insecurity. They see other people who live a similar life, but seem to have it together more, and instead of using it as inspiration they get mad because it makes them feel like a failure. I don't think overweight women who are mothers are failures, but I think they could take a time management lesson.

[myTake Owner]

I totally agree

[AshleyMD]

The controversy around all that started from misunderstandings, she was trying to motivate people who wanted to lose weight while they're a busy mother. These people took it as something else, the thought she was saying 'you're lazy if I can do it you have no excuse.' But of course that's not what she was saying, if everyone could just ask or come up with more than one possible explanation instead of jumping to conclusions all of this can be avoided.

[front2back]

There's nothing wrong with celebrating a woman's achievements. However, I've noticed many women try to "one-up" each other like men sometimes do. "You gave birth to a kid and think it's tough? Try FOUR, sweetie!" That kind of attitude is what the "doesn't need an excuse" campaign embodies.

[myTake Owner]

Totally agree with you.

[DumpliingPrincess]

It's probably because Marias photo was kind of patronizing. "What's your excuse?" Sounds like a challenge and basically telling other moms they're not as great as her.

[RalphBlack]

I guess your right. I mean, she did directly say the ladies who made memes names so yeah they do feel patronized I guess.
Also Jillian Michaels is patronizing to all those overweight contestants who volunteered on the Biggest Loser.
That show should go off the air after being successful for so many seasons.

[DumpliingPrincess]

I'm just saying this woman obviously made the photo to be patronizing and put herself above other moms. If all she wanted to do was celebrate her achievement, there are hundreds of other things she could have done. Nobody likes the whole look-what-I-did-I'm-better-than-you thing. And yes, America is over sensitive and fat now but c'mon this poster doesn't look like it was made with good intentions.

[RalphBlack]

I don't think she would go out of he way to promote being a complete asshole but who knows?

[DumpliingPrincess]

People go far out of their way to show off.

[myTake Owner]

I think it is a challenge for the moms who want to be more active but need that extra push. The message isn't directed at all moms.

[normalice]

it's because fat people are profitable. If everyone started eating healthy, fast food and many food suppliers would go out of business. A mere 30 years ago almost everyone in the U. S. was thin. What changed is the crap we put in our food.

[inamorata]

It's easier to attack people who tell you you're fat than to actually work on your body. I'm with the fit skinny lady. We all need to do our part.

[Anonymous]

Fat girls are salty that she's sexy and they're not lol. No guy applauds the fat girl, only other fat girls who need approval from someone. Advocating for minorities doesn't do anything for me but a mom who does that impresses me.

[miserybusiness]

I think you're being unfair. Maria Kang is a fitness guru so her body will OBVIOUSLY look like that before and after pregnancy, as it is her JOB to look fit. Many other mothers, however, do not work in the fitness business and resultantly, do not have the time or luxury to spend working out as much as she does. The so-called "salty fat women" are pointing out that they have different priorities. The standard Kang is setting is actually pretty unrealistic - unless, of course, you work in the fitness modelling industry like she does.

[myTake Owner]

@miserybusiness Yes, exercise is her field; however, being healthy isn't a job. It's something everyone should try to be, especially if there are children involved. As a parent, you have to do everything possible to stay healthy and be there for your children whenever you are in need. Staying fit isn't just about looks, it's about health and longevity.

[LauraMarx]

A truly ridiculous article, about a worthless image everyone has forgotten, and nobody cared about in the first place.

[miserybusiness]

Good for Kang for doing what she loves. Good for the other mothers for following their own pursuits.

[Anonymous]

Pff, those moms "changing the world" don't change anything by homeschooling anyone or advocating someone. They do what every normal person would do if she wanted to.

[Anonymous]

Maria is just tryna get male attention. True mothers are the real heroes of the world.