"Mother knows best"? My mom wants me back with my ex.

[Anonymous]

I went to the beach with my mom today, I met this guy who was really cute, we were talking but didn't exchange numbers just mostly friendly but there was conection there, he looked at me deep in the eyes and we were both smiling. Anyways, when we got home my mom kept saying my ex's name and then saying "oops I mean (a word that sounds similar)" I could tell she was doing it on purpose... she's always liked him... maybe she knows he is better for me? Why do you think she was doing this?

Updates

+1 y

more info: I broke up with him (because I was depressed) It was about a year ago and in the time broken up we tried a few times to get back togerher , but I always ended up ignoring him. I really don't know if he's right for me... I kind of just want to date other people, but when I do I always think of him:/

[worzt]

she always liked him but did she always tried to "broadcast him"? if it started right after the guy at the beach, did she see you interact with him or basically was able to guess "she met someone"? if she saw you and started to go bolder with "I liked your ex" then maybe, while liking your ex, is more an "I don't like this new guy" kind of thing, if she just suspects you met someone that made you curious maybe she doesn't want you rushing into it and risking you going thruough pain again, or maybe, she feels you need to face this thing with your ex and solve it, otherwise any new guywont work, basically, wether she liked him or not is irrelevant, she tells you "HIM" because she tells you what you need to hear or what you don't dare tell yourself, I'm betting on this last one.

[Asker]

"liking your ex, is more an 'I don't like this new guy' kind of thing" good point.. She was there when I was talking to him... the guy was flirting pretty heavily, I was giggly and a little too innocent... I haven't gotten action in a long time so I probally have "lonely girl" tattoed on my forehead... so any mom would be cautious seeing this interaction go down... but why mention the ex...

[Asker]

"you need to face this thing with your ex and solve it, otherwise any new guy won't work" another really good point.. I still love him.. last time she asked about (why I'm not with) him I said "I'm trying to work on myself" but I can never seem to get my life together... so obviously these same problems would roll over to any new guy... a guy can't fix my life...

[worzt]

oh! then is both things, she may love the idea of a new guy, specially if he is of the "charming" type, comming in a time on your life where you may not be fully ready, and then again the very good idea to close (or continue) a chapter before starting a new one. the most important thing was said by YOU: "a guy can't fix my life" :) only you can do it, and pretty sure with enough time and effort you will put everything in the right track

[worzt]

she may NOT love the idea*

[mistercupid]

You either have chemistry or you don't. You will allways think of your past relationships, looking back on past circumstances is how we learn. Do you remember the first time you got a sunburn? Do you let that turn you off from tanning now? If you have a problem with depression you will be unhappy sometimes for no reason. You might want to keep a journal and put your thoughts in writing someplace. Writing can help you guage your own feelings. I hope this helps.

[Asker]

I know this was posted a long time ago, but this is a great answer, thank you, I still miss my ex and this has helped... we do have chemistry but I am still depressed and not ready for anything:/

[washize]

If you regret breaking up with him, and there is no bad blood between you two. Perhaps you can give it another shot if he is willing and if it is something you ACTUALLY WANT.

Depression is an debilitating mental disorder, but if you had no attraction for the guy, then he just wasn't the one.

Don't let the pressure from the people you love push you into relationships that aren't want you want. That is how allot of marriages start and fail.

You date who's right for you and who YOU KNOW is the right guy for your personality, ideas, beliefs, and morals.

Always remember, you have to life with the partners you choose, if your mom likes him so much she can go after him lol

[tiffybaby]

If YOU want to date him again, give it a chance, but if you aren't sure you want to, then you probably don't want to. Just because you think of him, doesn't mean you want to get back with him. For a long while after my ex and I broke up, I thought of him everyday, but I didn't want him back. It may take you longer than you think to get over someone you had a relationship.

[mshaker]

Your mother wants you back with him. She clearly loves him and thinks and knows that he is the best for you. If you guys still talk, and you would like to pursue something with him, I suggest starting slow, aka talking once in a while, going out together, basically starting fresh again. I'm pretty sure you guys have grown and understand each other a lot more now, and what it takes to have a relationship. If your mother likes him, then I'm pretty sure your whole family does too. Take a stab at it, what do you have to lose?

[Confucius16]

If you always think of him, then perhaps you still like him but you can't see it yet? I wouldn't say that your mom is doing it on purpose. My brother and I have very similar names and we look sort of similar, and so many people get our names mixed up, including my mom. Just because she says that does not mean that she is doing it on purpose. Even if she is doing it on purpose, you don't need to try to read the hidden messages that she is implying.

If you want to get back together with your ex, you have to make sure what went wrong the first time won't happen again the second time.

[WizeGuy2350]

I'm sure your mother means well, but in my experience, getting back together with an ex never ends well. The two of you broke up for one or more very specific reasons, and those reasons will still be there. Your mother isn't the one who has to live your life; you are.

[mshaker]

it only ends well if they have both grown and gotten over their differences and are now more receptive and understand one another and a relationship. Sorry bud.

[sexyasianboi26]

Your mom does have the experience so it is wise to best listen to her. I mean you don't have to follow what she says, its your life; but then again "Mother knows best"

[Racez]

It must be that your mom really likes your ex to be the one whom you should be together with.

[Anonymous]

Have you tried not dating right now. You don't sound like you're too secure with yourself and you can't love others until you like yourself

[Asker]

idk how you got that from what I said? The part where I can't love myself is true...

[Asker]

I haven't dated since him, and I have no interest in other guys really.. I just want to move on, but I can't.

[Anonymous]

Well she dropped a hint. But until she actually says something straight I wouldn't take it to seriously. Do what you like.

[Anonymous]

Maybe your mom is just suggesting you date again.

[Asker]

but why right after meeting that other guy... I was happy for myself because finally I was thinking about someone else for once then she had to put my ex back in my head... I am thinking she is testing me (why?Idk..) because it been along time before I thought about anyone else..

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe ask her? Honestly, it could just be that she did a crappy job of it, but I think you should just get over your ex in your own time, find a guy you like and give that a shot.