The amount of times I come onto gag and see people wallowing in their fragile state of mind has been the inspiration for writing this mytake. I rarely write a mytake. That's generally because I can't be arsed or have better things to do, etc..haha.
I just want to bring a positive spin onto things and I've seen too many mytakes lately where people are ranting about something
Here goes nothing: you need to realise that feeling sorry for yourself won't change a situation or circumstance. Why? allowing those negative feelings to control you will only make you feel worse.
There have been times in my life where I have wallowed in self pity and its made me feel ten times worse than I initially felt.
It just happened this week. I had my performance review in work and it didn't go as well as I thought it would. I was devastated tbh and came away feeling awful. Its like I'd been hurt by someone really close to me. I was feeling sorry for myself. I had lots of thoughts about how rubbish I am, and what a waste of space I was. I even said at the end of my review that I'm a joke to my manager. Over the next couple of days I was letting those feelings control me and I was just wallowing in myself because I thought I'd really messed up and let myself down.
Its only today that I started to snap out of those negative emotions. I started seeing things in a different light. I thought I won't go anywhere if I am constantly feeling sorry for myself.
There are obviously other examples which this can relate too.
I failed an exam at the end of my second year of uni and I was completely devastated. I wallowed around for a bit after it happened and was again feeling really sorry for myself. Again I had those thoughts of I am a joke, I've completely ruined my life etc.. After getting my mind straight, I thought to myself I am going to work really hard and nail the module retake.
Was it a good outcome?
It was indeed, I completely nailed the module mytake. Now I have a degree.
Only we have the power to change how we feel about a certain situstion or circumstance. In regards to the first example I gave who knows what the outcome of that situation will be. I am going to up my game even more and see where that takes me.
How can you stop yourself from wallowing in self pity?
1. Try not to give the situation or circumstance too much thought by overthinking it like I did with both examples
2. Do something that makes you feel good about yourself. an example of this might he helping other people through whatever means that might be.
3. Take your mind off it i.e. go out and spend time with your friends or do something you actually enjoy doing like a hobby or going for a walk
4. Look at ways you can improve. Put a plan in place to achieve those improvements. This one might be more difficult than the others. Set goals for yourself, look to achieve something by a certain time and see where that takes you
Finally, I don't want to bore you with any more stories or examples from my life so I'll just leave it here and I hope this mytake helps someone. I don't claim to be an expert, I just want to try and help people through this mytake.