How do you find purpose in your life?

[johnlonga]

Hi,

TLDR: * * * (TLDR found between asterisks--you can thank me later ; ) )

How the fuck do you find purpose in your life, seriously? I'm 30, and I still can't find a fucking “purpose” for my life. I don't really get it.

(Please don't give some bullshit, regurgitated canned response that you read on some website either. If that's all you got, save it for another time, por favor : )).

Also, what the fuck exactly is “purpose?” I mean is there some mythology tied into it? I mean when you think of what your “purpose” is, what exactly is it? It's certainly different than goals, b/c goals you attain and then make new ones—but a purpose seems to be some sort of underlying motivation for why you wake up every morning.

* * *

(Part of me believes that the concept of “purpose” is some commercially-propelled, post-industrialized idea that I would have never had to contemplate if I was living in some hunter-gatherer tribe far far away from here. But maybe I'm wrong. Maybe they have “purpose” too, and I think if you asked them, they would probably have their own answer—which then makes me think that purpose is somehow tied to mythology in a way, almost as if there's a need for us to create some sort of personalized story of how we relate to the world and shit, and if we don't have that story, life tends to suck. So maybe “purpose” and, what you might call, “personal mythology” have some sort of intimate relationship. It just seems in our currenty hypertechnological world, with all its distractions and options and what have you, that it is overwhelmingly difficult--probably the most difficult it's ever been chronologically--to find "purpose")

I think my problem is I'm pretty philosophical (also, I've got the annoying ass personality of an INTJ and 5 for anneagram, if you're familiar with either one—and I think they describe me fairly well), and so it's not easy for me to get mentally tied up into stupid shit and stupid fantasies about my own life and where I'm headed and why I'm headed there. Occasionally, I'll maintain a fantasy for a while—like when I my early twenties, I fooled myself into believing that I was going to become a great corporate or civil lawyer, and that I was going to expose every hole and weakness in the prosecution's case against my client, and that to win, they would definitely have to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that my client was guilty, and even if I knew my client was guilty, I'd still make sure they'd have to prove it.

Then I did more research about being a lawyer, about getting into law school, about finding a job afterwards, etc, and I realized it was, on average, a pretty shitty, over-glamorized career.

And other shit I'd be interested in, say like radiology or something in the healthcare industry—well fuck, just about any job that's seemingly “remotely” interesting requires you to jump through a bunch of bullshit hoops to get there.

I'm not a fan of bullshit--never have and never will be. Which means, I'm never going to jump through any of those hoops, even though I'm sure I could be just as good as a radiologist as any other practicing radiologist. This frustrates me and pisses me off, and makes me not want to be “anything” because to be something typically means you've had to have jumped through a bunch of bullshit hoops, and it's against my personal beliefs to do that sort of jumping.

People tell me—I mean literally fucking everyone I've had this conversation with—something along the lines of, “well, if you really think that's what you want to do, and if you love something that much, you should be willing to do all the (stupid) steps required to get there.” (It frustrates me that everyone holds this view—b/c this view is exactly the mind frame that results in the creation of the useless prerequisites we have to fulfill to get into just about any worthy profession)

Anyhow, it doesn't really matter I guess—because I've talked to people who have had careers that I've wanted to have, and guess what? They still have existential crises, and they still wonder about their "purpose" in life.

I would just say it's much preferable to have an existential crises while you are at least doing something you enjoy doing and making good money, than to have frequently recurring existential crises while not enjoying what you're doing for work and being flat broke.

So. . .if anyone has some guidance in this regard, I'm all ears : ) .

[frankeubanks]

God had a purpose both for your life and my life. I made some bad choices and never learned what God's purpose for my life was. Now I am a calamity with no remedy. I day dream of enjoying physical intimacy with what-I-want-for-a-wife type black women. I commit adultery and fornication left and right, sometimes over 100 times in a day, per Matthew 5:28. If Jesus Christ cannot show me what my purpose in life is, I will never learn. Study the Holy Bible! If you find your purpose in life in it, tell me where you found it. I know not God's will for my life. I know not whether Jesus Christ can save me from my calamity. I pray that Jesus Christ will not only perform the miracle of allowing me to become a good servant of His, but also the miracle of allowing me to become a good steward of His. You must learn how to receive to free ticket to eternal life in Heaven before time expires for you to do so. I cannot repent from sexual sin. Has time expired for me to become a saved Christian? If I have to spend eternity in agony in Hell after I die, I have no one to blame but myself for the bad choices I made when I was young. You must get a hold of Jesus Christ to learn what your purpose in your life is, while you still have time. It may be too late for Jesus Christ to help me. I will pray that Jesus Christ helps you, but I do not know if Jesus Christ can even say yes to that prayer.