How can I prevent my mom from finding out that I poop?

Explained it in the title.How can I prevent my mom from finding out that I poop?
Updates:
Hey everyone, clearly this was not a serious question. I lost a bet with another gagger and had to post it. Thanks to everyone they posted comments that made me laugh 😂🤗

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Hide all your poop in a secret space pocket that only opens once your brother (or insert someone you want to blame here) needs to poop and which carefully deposits some among his crap. You may may want to prepare a virus which targets the biological content of your poop while your poop is in the space pocket so that your DNA will have a negligible presence in the poop should your mom think to check each person's poop content on that level. I also recommend using nanobots to gild your poop with a layer of your brother's poop for good measure.

    Then make sure to constantly filter your skin and clothes of all remnant fecal matter in case your mom has microscopic vision...

    Bribe someone to casually comment in the presence of your mom on how they suspect you never poop. They need to give good arguments. They should preferably have legal training.

    You should also hire/ consult with a professional hypnotist to instill subliminal messages in your mother which lead her to eventually believe her little darling would never poop.

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  • Ah yes, classic. This is the method I'm currently using, it's quite easy actually. When you gotta shit you just open the window and do your business there. This way you avoid ever having to flush the toilet which would obviously let her know your secrets.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • ... what πŸ˜‚ you’re trolling right?
    Every human poops... every ANIMAL poops... every LIVING THING has to find some way to release waste for functional regulation. Plants fart by releasing oxygen... people don’t see it that way but that’s exactly what it is. Plants release gas they don’t need. They are farting. So... I’m pretty sure you’re mom knows you poop πŸ˜‚

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  • sorry guys,
    we women poop and we are DISGUSTING CREATURES

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What Guys Said 37

  • erm huh? you're mam is human, your mam is by age, intelligence and well just the knowledge of basic biology means you have to realise that everyone has to crap, everyone has to pee, it is how the body works... it is what we all do... preventing someone from knowing that you do this is impossible, preventing them from hearing you do it would be easier...
    shut the door

    but i hope you are joking about this question lmao

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  • Poop

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  • Ummmm lol... I know this can't be serious but I'll answer anyway. Tell her the neighbor just called and said it's urgent that she goes over right away.

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  • One bottle of vodka for each meal, that's all.
    But, I gotta tell you, kid, there's nothing wrong with the fact that you poop, as long as you poop good looking poop.

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  • I think your mom found out that you poop soon after you were born.

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  • FLUSHHHHHHHHH
    And some perfume to hide the smell

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  • Just don't poop. Hold it in for ever. Live life as a poop barrel. You never know, you might get into the Guinness Book Of Records.

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  • She already knows that you poop. Over 1,000 diapers don't lie.

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  • She changed your diapers as an infant... I think the jig is up.

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  • Questions like these make me wish for a troll button to report them.

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  • um everyone poops lol why dont you want your mom to know that you poop? lmfao i mean i think she already knows lmfao xD

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  • Get the fuck off of GAG. You're a waste of space writing pointless questions like this.

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  • I missed that question...

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  • no need to hide the fact, unless you poop on the floor or in your pants. other than that, it is normal for an 18 year old to poop...

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  • Bury it like a dog, by the way I think your mother knows you poop since she more and likely changed your diapers

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  • Your mom knew that before you knew what poop was. Lol. πŸ˜‚

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  • I think she knows that you poop. πŸ˜… I guess when you were a baby she occasionally changed the nappy

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  • Umm considering that she probably used to change your diapers I think she knows.

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  • Get a bucket with a contained singularity inside. Poop in it. The poop will be gone.

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  • Hide it under your pillow.

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  • Don't poop from now on.

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  • What do you mean? Everyone poops

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  • You need a shrink.

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  • Are u alright?

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  • ...0_o

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  • Why?

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  • What’s poop an why u show a drinking fountain

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  • Better to eat your poop!!! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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  • Oh wow I thought woman didn't poop

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  • probably the stupidest question i've ever seen

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What Girls Said 17

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