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I have a sad story to share. I said hurtful things to my crush when I was a HS freshman. He was just joking (though lame jokes) and was going to ask me out but I reacted badly. I thought I was being insulted and reacted too quickly, too impulsive. These were my words:
''Well you look like a stupid rabbit. No I don't like you. You're nothing but garbage. Garbage, garbage. Me going out with you, keep dreaming, loser''. Little did I know what I've said would haunt me years later.
The worst part is I said all that while still liking him. Then he requested me on FB when we were in our early 20's but we never spoke about that event, we're with someone else already (he's engaged while I'm in a rocky relationship going nowhere) and I never apologized either.
I'm working as a HR specialist (I've studied business administration) and only need one year to finish my Master's. Meanwhile staring right at my screen, it's him under his white uniform, progressing in the medicine field. I've insulted a future surgeon, a stable, family oriented man. That was my future right there. I had it all at an early age and told him garbage. He's engaged already and well my relationship isn't going anywhere. My current boyfriend is nothing in comparing to what I just threw away when I was 14.
How often does this happens? My very first option was right there and I stupidly threw it away.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
That sucks. I've definitely done or said dumb stuff as a teenager that I regretted later on. But you can't dwell on the past forever, ya know?
It sounds like you and this guy both ended up with other people since high school. So even if things had gone differently back then, there's no guaranteeing you'd still be together. Don't beat yourself up over what could have been.
Yeah, your rude words probably hurt his feelings at the time. But most guys would get over something said as a kid. If he's engaged now, seems like he did alright for himself in the end.
Maybe someday if you see him in passing you could apologize for how you acted back in the day. But don't obsess over this guy or what could have been. Focus on whether your current relationship is right for you now. Or start putting yourself out there to meet someone new if it's not. You still have your whole career ahead of ya! This one regret doesn't define your whole life. Chin up luv!
We all do stupid stuff as kids. It’s a lot easier to look back and wonder Wtf we were thinking from a more objective viewpoint. I made some enemies in middle and high school, but seeing them now it’s all forgiven and forgotten.
It might be a little different since he was trying to ask you out and you said that to him. That definitely would have cured me of approaching women lol. But he turned out okay. If you ever get a chance to apologize it couldn’t hurt- but then again, maybe it’s better to let the past be forgotten.
Yeah I would slap my younger version self and be like ''omg what the hell were you thinking, relax girl, chill, calm down''.
I'm worried about myself though. I'm 27 and likely about to end another unstable relationship heading nowhere, another wasted time. Within 3 years I'l be 30 and it's going to be harder to find commitment by then.
Again, you were 14. And there could have been a million different things that could have happened that prevented you two from being together.
It’s definitely a good idea to start dating for marriage though, it doesn’t get any easier in your 30’s. I’d say I have less interactions with new people now than ever before. But you also don’t want to rush into something that’s destined to fail.
Sorry girl, I feel your pain. My story is not exactly the same as yours, but the outcome was the same. I misjudged a guy in high school and treated him badly. Tbh I thought I was better than him, and that I could do better. He turned out to be a really, really great guy, and looking back now I realize what a mistake I made. He is married now and I'll regret it my whole life. I wish him all the happiness in the world though.