If he puts his arm around me, do I put my head on his chest??

[dothedew]

I may be going to a guy's house (at least he openly invited me the next time I'm home which won't be til the summer sometime). We've known each other for five years and since last summer have been flirting back and forth. We've gone out for lunch a few times to hang out and chat, get to know each other.

My question is (and maybe I've been watching too many movies; perhaps guys don't do this) is: I'm hoping we watch a movie at his house. If that's the case and we're both sitting on his couch or whatever, if he pulls the ol' pull the arm around my shoulder, what should I do? Should I move closer and put my head on his chest or just ignore it? Give him a smile to let him know I notice what he's doing? (Can you tell I haven't had too many boyfriends?)

[antivenin]

You must not be sure if he likes you or not. Be certain that if he puts his arm around you he likes you. If you like the boy move "towards" him and for God's sake don't "ignore" him. That just wouldn't be polite.

[dothedew]

It's true I do not know if he likes me or not. He's been flirting with me so I think he's attracted to me, but not sure how far it goes.

[antivenin]

Attraction = Flirt = Continued Flirting = Like I don't know any guys who are attracted to a girl and then keep flirting with her if he doesn't like her. Err on the side of "he likes you and you can lay your head on his chest." There are very few things that feel better than a girl you dig moving in close to you. ; )

[dothedew]

Have another question for you: we live several states away and can't see each other since we both work at universities. The last time we saw each other (which was 3 mo. spell) was around Christmas when we had coffee, talked for over 2 hrs. and we gazed in each other's eyes. He had flirted with me, but not nearly that intense. Afterwards was when he said the next time I'm in town we can just meet at his house (which will be at least a 6 mo. spell!)

OK, the question....

[dothedew]

The question: how do long-distance "couples" flirt? I mean, he'll tease me in emails that I send him, calling me names, etc. And when we talk on the phone we laugh a lot. I'm just kinda caught on your term "continue flirting" - since we don't see each other often, it's kinda hard to tell if he's still flirting with me or not.

[antivenin]

He is still flirting with you and he likes you. Since you live a distance from each other you will have to ask yourself not whether he likes you, but what kind of relationship you will have and what that means to you. Meaning.... Are you to be pen pal flirts or sometimes sexual partners or .....?

[dothedew]

Yeah ever since that mtg. around Christmas I had tried keeping in touch through email and phone like usual and he had totally ignored me. For 2 mo. He finally responded to one of my emails earlier this week, thanking me for keeping in touch and ending with "I've had a rough term" (not sure if it's school or personal). He then asked me if I was going to be home for Easter. It sounds like he really wants to see me again and can't wait for summer. I wish I could see him at Easter but can't-Itoldhim

[antivenin]

This relationship is going to be tough. You should set this aside and if something develops then you can deal with it then but for now I wouldn't spend much time on it.

[allola]

Lean into him. Yes, lay your head on his shoulder or chest.

If he doesn't get a response, he'll start to wonder if something's wrong.