You know they say, relationships are about compromise.
I agree, they are.
Every relationship has a midpoint road where you have to meet your significant other.
There are many things you will agree on, and plenty of others you will disagree on.
In order to make things work, you have to discuss the things that are allowed in your relationship.
So, there you have it!
You have to share a common ground.
You have to draw out a plan and come to terms with what is laid out before you.
This is great because if the plot works,
it will show that the both of you are compatible with each other.
If you succeed in making things work, like a puzzle piece the both of you will fit together.
As time goes on, more and more pieces are added to this puzzle;
they too will continue to fit together over time.
Eventually, a beautiful picture will be created
showing an entire representation of how much the both of you have blossomed;
throughout your relationship.
On the contrary,
There are those who are in relationships that try to dominate its entire existence.
This is what sucks the life out of it and the people who allow themselves to be wrapped up,
in the huge pile of puzzle pieces that don't fit together!
When that happens,
You slip.
You fall.
You get back up (if you have sufficient strength).
And in no time you find yourself slipping again.
This takes you to a whole new level of frustration!
It is clear to see, things should not be this way.
How can you create a picture with incompatible pieces?
You simply cannot!
A relationship is about compromising in order to make choices that are beneficial in your relationship, but it should never be about compromising yourself.
You should never settle to be someone else because it is what makes your partner happy and secure in the relationship.
Your significant other should not be trying to dictate your every move.
If they are trying to do so, it is showing their lack of trust in you.
How can a relationship succeed when the glue of it (trust),
was never there in the first place?
Every relationship needs its glue in order to hold it together.
If it doesn't have it, it's only a matter of time before you are slipping in a large
amount of puzzle pieces that don't fit in sync.
Your significant other should not be controlling (which is a possessive trait),
Examples of controlling behavior:
-They tell you what is appropriate for you to wear.
-They tell you that they need to know your login passwords to social media sites.
-They constantly check through your phone.
-They sniff your body parts to see if you've been faithful.
-They dictate who you talk to.
-They follow you to places.
The list continues to go on.
You cannot be who you are as a person, when you are being smothered.
Someone that tries to compromise your entire existence as a person,
in most cases is someone that is insecure.
Perhaps, this person has been wronged in their previous relationships.
In order for them to feel like the relationship is succeeding,
they feel they need to have this control over you, to verify that everything is going "perfect".
If they do not have this grip on the relationship, the negative views
they have about you will begin to over power them.
Eventually the voices in their head will grow louder than their own.
Whatever this significant other's reasoning behind their actions are,
It does not justify their doings.
Love should not be a jail.
Love is about having freedom.
The freedom to explore life by yourself, gain your own experiences and those with
your partner.
Love should not hinder your development as a individual and together
with each other as a whole.
True love allows space and room.
It allows you to sprout out because it knows that is the root of its development.
If a significant other finds themselves unable to allow that growth, they
need to end the relationship to work on themselves.
You cannot give the "whole" of yourself, to someone if you enter into a relationship "incomplete".
Love cannot discover new horizons unless one has the courage to lose sight of the obstacles that hinder its growth.
Thanks for reading!
- For more about love please visit my other take : What Is True Love?
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