There's a common stereotype that all or most women prefer bad guys or the assholes out there. They also say "Nice guys finish last." From my experience this is not true in any way, shape or form.
1. I know they'll always be there for me.
No matter what I feel I always know they'll be there to listen to me, and care about what I have to say. I don't like feeling like I'll just be a bother to a guy who does not care.
2. Nice guys usually pay attention more.
I am not asking for all men to remember every little detail I say, as I can understand that some people can forget details, I have a bad memory myself, but I prefer men who listen to what I have to say and don't ignore it, or put it off like it's nothing.
3. I don't have to worry about what they'll do next, or how they'll respond to something.
Now, I've been with nice guys, and what you could consider "bad guys" and when I dated so called "bad guys," whenever I share my feelings towards them I get mixed responses and some of them do not give a care in the world, some said my feelings were stupid, etc. With a nice guy they would accept my opinions and I can accept theirs too. I didn't have to worry about how they would think of my opinions because I knew no matter what they'd respond in a mature way.
4. They know me more than I know myself sometimes.
Whenever I'm upset about something and I do not feel like sharing it they know something is up with me and they do not hesitate to find out what's wrong. They know me well enough.
5. They respect me and I respect them
Now, I respect any guy I have dated regardless of how their personality was, but I feel like nice guys respect me more than a guy who acts as a jerk would. No insults out of the blue, no saying my choices are stupid. No pressuring me into anything I do not feel comfortable with.
These are just my opinions keep in mind, I do not disagree with anyone who prefers so called "bad guys" and I don't hate them.
This is just my preference.
5 Reasons Why I Prefer Nice Guys, and Why Not ALL Women Go for Bad Boys
I really do believe most normal, well-adjusted, mature females prefer a nice guy as opposed to a guy who will, in the long run, only make their lives more dramatic and invariably worse.
Here's one truism:
Few "bad boys" will enjoy their golden years. In addition to what is typically a poor lifestyle, they never really learned how to be close to someone and how to be in a loving, give-and-take relationship that will sustain their happiness well past the days of endless sexual stamina.
While on the flip side, you will find very few nice guys who, on their deathbeds, actually regret being nice guys. ;)
Yea, most normal girls with any shred of self worth like nicer guys. Notice it's always women who have low confidence, low self worth, or just don't know any better because their home life was full of shitty relationships that always go for those guys. It's never anybody with any common sense or high self esteem who values herself a lot who gets bad boy after bad boy then complains guys are all bad.
I would concur (and I'd also agree)... By the way, what percentage of single women out there possess enough self-worth, self-esteem, or common sense exists? That's a question even a top statistician would be mind-blown by.
Here's a good explanation of the truth in most cases. Excellent words. I have noticed in most of the cases it's exactly what you said. Girls with low confidence, self worth and so on...
This is what a nice guy is. I'm glad to see this Take from a woman in GAG, usually all the Takes about nice guys are about how bad they are and how it's all a facade, when in reality, most nice guys aren't like that, and are just how you described.
Happy to see a girl who speaks positive about nice guys, and not in a negative, and bitter way.
Yeah, I can almost not believe it for myself. First they say nice guys aren't nice. Then they are wondering where the nice guys have gone. Well, according to that person they aren't nice she said, so what's the surprise if they are there but aren't what they describe "nice".
Yeah man. It is a double standard in society. Have you noticed how most people (not all) don't truly respect nice guys? Most view them as wussies or unmanly. Most people respect them but not TRULY respect them. So many people joke around about how when a guy is ok with listening to people's problems without getting annoyed, that they call them''their bitch.'' Most people TRULY respect nice females because they view them being nice as'' feminine.'' Double standard man.
@steven7890789 I see none of that kind of double standard over here but there are others (which I cannot remember atm). I however see plenty of traditional bullshit gender roles. They are fucking disgusting man! I hate (traditional) gender roles!
And yeah, let me repeat myself: If women say nice guys aren't nice then those women, who say so shouldn't be surprised with their sour outcomes.
You realise, by the time you figure out a bad guy is actually bad, its too late 😝 I'm telling you from the heart, if he is skilled at manipulating women you won't have a clue until you have dated a long time.
Lets be honest though, you won't date an socially backward or unnatractive nice guy and the outgoing handsome young guys who exhibit these traits are in such high demnad that theh are almost unversally playing the field. Like someone has already said, better to be a douchebag player until your late 20's then turn into a genuinely nice guy once you have selected your woman to settle down with.
My boyfriend doesn't think any less of me even now that he's seen me break into tears because I'm going to go home to my mom after a bad swim and get told how useless and disgusting I am, or try and punch someone because they called my best friend "a tubby, socially awkward retard" or when I broke down and told him that I've contemplated ending it all more times than I can count on both hands. He's been there for me for me through hell, and I love him even more for that
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
As I guy I honestly believe all women like bad boys over nice guys regardless of what they say. They will say they want a nice guy but they will always go for the bad boys. Mostly because they don't know what they want or they lie to themselves that the bad boy is actually nice. They think they can chance them and make them a nice guy. While if you are a nice guy they will look for excuses to not want you. You're too predictable, a push over or just not interesting. I once was a nice guy but girls would treat me like dirt. I gave up hope on them and not like that anymore. Whenever I hear a woman say she wants a nice guy I know she's lying since odds are she already knows one or two but would never even consider them let alone give them a chance. As for guys don't be a nice guy, we'll unless you enjoy being treated like shit.
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myTake Owner
+1 y
I don't blame you for thinking that considering a lot of women have done things that it's a stereotype now, but in all honesty, some of us know bad guys when we see one. I've seen too many women get hurt trying to "change" them when they think they're nice.
It's such a shame that society has changed the outlook on nice guys.
I don't think a lot of women even know they are into bad boys. It's like they have blinders on and just see the nice guy they wish he was. As a former nice guy tho I can say the dark side is more enjoyable. There takes little to no effort to be so. On top of that you can I can do things my way. Don't even need to compromise. If you don't like to do things my way then fuck off, I'll find someone who does. And finally a women will never respond to you the way they do when you trest them poorly vs treating them nice. Sad; yeah I guess so. But from knowing how women respond to men based on how they act and treat them, it is so much more better being a bad guy then a nice guy chump. So I am glad that women have treated me so poorly in the past that I slowly evolved from a nice guy into a bad boy.
It's been shown that a woman's perception of a man's personality of being nice is often heavily tied to how he looks and his status. You see we often tend to let looks influence our perception of people. We see a good looking person and default we assume they are good people and in addition we tend to overlook many of their traits that make them a bad person. It can also be seen that small acts of decency by famous people tend to be blow out of proportion such as if the incident with Usian Bolt standing to the national anthem.
In addition to this woman tend to think men are funnier also the more attractive they are.
As an aside, I hold the opposite belief. If I see a nice-looking person of either gender, I assume they have some hidden character flaw. Everyone has faults (inward or outward). Nice-looking people tend to be arrogant (that's because they've been taught from Day One that they're better than everyone else). The only nice-looking people who aren't arrogant are those who grew-up as ugly ducklings (so they know what it's like to be despised) and those who just happen to have humble personalities.
Some nice guys dont finish at all... They just end up being grumpy or bitter never letting anyone close, never opening heir heart. Some end up being hermits... So its not really true that they finish last or other way around cos some dont finish and some dont even start. I am certain i will be one of thous grumpy bitter hermits cos no girl will ever go that far to chase you till you actually give her any chance. Its just next to impossible to get attention of guy that had bad luck with girls cos he was not "cool" enough like some bad boys early in his life... When girls finally decide they need to settle down with someone like him they are not even on his radar and they can't do anything to change that... Nice guys dont even finish.
I don't know how I stand in this but I ended up attracting a woman in her 30s by being nice, genuine, and helpful to my peers. I'm also very good at reading people and getting into their heads. The trick is balance. Be nice but not nice where you put them on a pedestal and make them feel like they are being worshiped. Be firm to who you are as well. Don't treat her like a queen, treat her as a human being. I've been doing this for awhile now and I've been attracting a lot of women lately. Been getting checked it a lot, girls flirting with me at random. And I can tell you that it isn't my looks that's doing it cause I'm like a 3. I think women are attracted by the way you carry yourself because if you aren't confident, others see it too based from your body language.
Men need to be more aware of how to read body language. Women i feel do it more.
Most people aren't like you. You and my girlfriend represent a low percentage of people that TRULY RESPECT nice guys. MOST (but not all) males and females don't truly respect good guys. They respect them but only few TRULY respect them. It is a double standard in society that when a guy expresses that he is really caring and that he is willing to listen to people's problems without getting annoyed he is viewed as a wuss, unmanly. So many times people joke around that when a guy is there for people that he is''their bitch,'' whereas most males and females TRULY respect the nice females because they believe she is just being ''feminine.'' I am a nice guy and most of the time people don't truly respect me. Very few people do. They tried to take advantage of me, they have made fun of me, etc. Like I said before very few people are like my best friend and girlfriend.
Can relate to all of these and believe in them. But I'd like consider myself down to earth rather than nice. I wouldn't consider any of this to be nice it's more just normal social behavior. I'd argue there are people with normal personalities and then ones with rotten and deficient ones. I don't believe anyone is truly nice or evil. But would say there are many people who do go after the rotten ones and pass up those with normal more desirable personalities. That's just the cold hard truth.
However, those pics look like decent to attractive men. And ding ding ding! That's literally what everyone wants- an attractive AND nice person.
Most of these dudes use "nice" to disguise the fact that that's all they have to offer. Sorry, just like guys say "i can't fuck her personality" we can't either. Be nice AND attractive and most of those dudes are taken
Well they do finish last in the sense that you go for them only after you tried and failed with the bad-boys. They are rarely your first choice but rather the backup for after your first choice screwed you over.
Just yesterday I saw girls with bad boys where I work. They date each other. Most of the girls like bad boys and handsome guys. Appearance is the most important things for girls. Girls are not looking for personality. Personality is not so important for girls. They want handsome men. But we guys don't give so much importance to appearance. I dated with ugly girls and beautiful girls. Maybe you are this type of girl who like good guys. I don't know you. But if you think if a guy handsome it mean he is also a good guy. I don't agree with you.
This is probably the most uplifting myTake I've ever read here. It really restored some of my faith in humanity, so thank you for taking the time to write this! At first I wondered why you would go anonymous with something that's nothing but positive, but then I read the comments. So many bitter guys. What's up with all that unwarranted negativity? This was supposed to cheer you up, fools!
Just beware the "Nice Guys" that tout that they are nice guys and complain all the time about finishing last. Or never getting the girl. Those aren't really nice guys. I personally have never said that i am a nice guy... But my wife and her family insist that i am.
One pattern I have noticed over the years , is that it is generally girls / women with lower self esteem that tend to go for the so called bad boys , higher self esteem women may have partnered with " bad boys " in their youth , but soon turn their backs on them later. The same is true for men , the lower self esteem " doormat " type men often end up with users and / or psycho women.
"how you down" tribuani aside lol, I agree, also just because we are nice doesn't mean we can be pushed around easily like most people think. I myself and a nice guy out of respect and kindness, but push me too far or mess with a family member and I will go donkey long on them, forgive the bad over used metaphor
'm a "nice guy" and labeled as "safe" and I'm ok with that. The thought of "you think I'm a lay down person that isn't interested in women? Well get me riled up and a gal I'm attracted to and then you tell me what you think."
Interesting list, but if you met such a men you would banish him to the Friend Zone and throw yourself crotch first at the next player or bad boy who came along. That is what women do, especially when they are younger than about 30.
Nice Guys do finish LAST. Those Women you speak of will get used and dumped by the bad boys again and again. Ultimately, they will "settle" for the Nice Guy. And what does the Nice Guy get?
What type of women do you focus on? Because I'm way under 30. And I NEVER ONCE went for the bad boy type. But you wouldn't think that's possible since you seem to only focus on bimbos that chase after douchebags.
You are the type of girl i would commit to in a heartbeat. I wish more women were like you. I hope you get a guy that will respect you forever. You deserve every bit of love. Why are you anon... i want to know this awesome girl
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