Why Men And Women Can’t Be “Just Friends”!

MrOracle

#justfriends #menandwomenaredifferent

“Can men and women be ‘just friends’?” is an age-old question, but I’m here to answer it for you. If you aren’t interested in reading too much, I’ll save you the effort - the answer is NO! Most guys know this, but most girls don’t seem to.




Before you disagree, though, we must agree on some definitions and situations, and we must acknowledge that every rule has the occasional exception. Yes, exceptions exist, but they’re rare, and thus we’re talking about the RULE - what is, by far, the most likely outcome.

Why Men And Women Can’t Be “Just Friends”!


Most women don’t have a lot of trouble being “just friends” with guys, and so women frequently answer this question with “of COURSE men and women can be ‘just friends’” - but they’re wrong. Part of that, again, is agreeing on what we’re really talking about.


A “friend” is someone you CHOOSE to have a close relationship with and spend a lot of time with. We aren’t talking about colleagues, your buddy’s girlfriend, children of your parents’ good friends, etc. In other words, these aren’t people you see because someone else has paired you up on occasion - these are people you go out of your way to see and spend time with.


A “JUST friend” is someone you have a close friendship with, who does NOT have any desire to have a romantic or sexual relationship with you. Notice I said DESIRE, because the presence of desire is enough to completely change the nature of the relationship - you don’t have to take overt action, such as asking the other “friend” out, in order for desire to affect the friendship.


And when we say “men”, we’re talking about men who are straight (or, perhaps bisexual) and single (or not above cheating on their SO). Men in a happy, monogamous relationship already could potentially be “just friends” with women - but in practice, it’s pretty rare. And some of these things may also apply to homosexual relationships too, but we’re focusing on heteros here.

Why Men And Women Can’t Be “Just Friends”!


Okay, so we all understand the kind of relationships we’re talking about, right? Right. So, here’s a major difference in how men and women work:


Both men and women look at (singles of the) the opposite sex that we meet in the world, and we put them into 3 main “relationship” categories. For men and women both, the first and last categories are the same, but the middle one is vastly different.


Women put men into one of these three categories:


1. Men I’m very attracted to/have feelings for/want to be in a relationship with. (This is a very small percentage of single men, perhaps 3-5% max.)

2. Men I don’t have feelings for, but who are interesting in some way and so I’d like to potentially be “just friends” with them and have them as a resource and source of attention. (This is roughly half of all guys - we’ll call it 45-47%.)

3. Men I have no attraction to of any kind, and thus have no interest in whatsoever. (50% of men.)

Men put women into one of these three categories:


1. Women I’m very attracted to/have feelings for/want to be in a relationship with. (This is a very small percentage of single men, perhaps 3-5% max.)

2. Women I don’t have feelings for, but I find physically attractive, and thus would like to have sex with. (This is roughly half of all girls - we’ll call it 45-47%.)

3. Women I have no attraction to of any kind, and thus have no interest in whatsoever. (50% of women.)

As you can see, that middle category is VERY different between men and women. But WHY?


It’s pretty simple: in each case, the desire matches perfectly with what is most advantageous for that person.


Women, as a rule, aren’t interested in casual sex - most may make a very RARE exception for a super, ultra-hot guy or a guy with gobs of charisma that all her friends like too, but otherwise, girls are only interested in sex once they’ve already established an EMOTIONAL CONNECTION with a man. But women are still very much interested in male attention, and in having men available to listen to her problems, give her emotional support, and to help with physical work. So, being “just friends” with guys gives her a number of advantages and benefits, and hardly any downside.


Men, as a rule, aren’t interested in being “just friends” - because there is little-to-no upside for a man to be “just friends” with women from a man’s point of view. We already fix our own cars, take out our own garbage, work on our own houses, open our own pickle jars, and when we’re in a relationship, have our own women’s problems to listen to. Most women don’t bring much if anything to the table as “just a friend” from a man’s perspective, but there is lots of effort and obligation that comes with that package.




And when a man is single, his #2 priority (just after physical survival) is HAVING SEX. When we’re single and not having sex, the most important thing - the thing that drives us - is HAVING SEX. Sure, we have other priorities too, but they’re lower on the list, and we can’t give them our full attention if we aren’t having sex. Men are also different from women in that we don’t NEED to have an emotional connection to have sex or to enjoy it. Sure, sex WITH emotions is better - much like food with spices is better than plain food - but no guy wants to starve to death waiting for spiced food. We’ll always prefer SOME sex over no sex at all, even if it’s not ideal. That’s because sex is a lot higher on men’s priority list then on women’s - for women, their top priority after survival is an EMOTIONAL CONNECTION - very different from men. (I should also mention here that some guys ARE hoping for a relationship/emotional connection from his “friend” too - but that’s less common.)


So, how does this affect “friendships”? Simple: women, every one of your male “friends” wants to have sex with you. Some also have feelings for you and would like a romantic relationship. They may not overtly act on it, and they may deny it when asked, and they may (rarely) even turn down sex if offered (if they know there will be other consequences), but in almost every case, it’s true. And, believe me, that desire greatly affects your relationship!


“But that’s crazy!” you say? Yeah, it kind of is. A lot of men - the kind that aren’t already getting laid - will go against their instincts and become “just friends” with one or several women, and spend time with them and give them attention and do favors for them, all in the (usually vain) hope that she’ll suddenly realize “hey, he’s a great guy - maybe I’ll sleep with him today!” Of course that almost never happens, but the HOPE keeps things alive. And, as shameful as it is to admit it, some guys, so desperate for sex, will also stay in a “friendship” on the off-chance that she’ll break up with her boyfriend, or otherwise have a hard time emotionally, and seek “comfort” and validation from him that he can turn into a sexual encounter - and THAT happens more often than anyone would like to admit (but still not that often).




What, you don’t believe any of this? Well, I have a simple test that you can use to see if it applies to YOUR friendships. Ladies, tell your “guy friends” that, while you value his friendship, things will NEVER, EVER go further. Essentially, kill all hope of sex or a romantic relationship.


In most cases, what will happen is that your male “friend” will start to fade out of your life. Why? Because for him, it was never about being “just friends”, it was about getting laid (and much less often, about getting a girlfriend). Once you kill that hope completely, most men are going to realize that the hopes that kept them in the relationship are gone, and they no longer have interest in what’s left.

Why Men And Women Can’t Be “Just Friends”!


That sounds cold and awful - and it kind of is - but it’s the TRUTH, and women especially need to be aware that this truth exists, or she’s going to have the wrong perception of what her “just friends” relationships actually are - and she’ll say things like “sure, men and women can be just friends!” Sadly, that’s just not the truth.

Why Men And Women Can’t Be “Just Friends”!
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Most Helpful Girl

  • lumos
    I can see how this works with the average basement dweller who doesn’t get a whole lot of contact with women in general, but this does not apply to 99% of the guys I know personally.
    I’ve been friends with, and still am friends with, plenty of guys. During our friendship they’ve gotten in and out of their own relationships, and so have I. Sometimes I’ve even given them advice on how to get the girl they want. I matched two of my friends together, and they’ve been in a relationship for several years now.
    We’ve hung out at school in groups, been to parties, hung out one on one, texted and called each other. Not once have any of them tried to make a move or express any sort of attraction. Neither have I. This is also the case with my brother, and his group of friends that consist of both girls and guys. My parents also have a massive group of friends, all of which are either married or single. It totally works.
    So I dunno if this is just an American thing but where I’m from, it’s the norm to have friends of the opposite sex and to not just see them as a potential partner or person to fuck. We’re capable of seeing each other as just friends, and to really value these friendships for what they are.
    So. I completely disagree. Everywhere around me I see working friendships between people of the opposite sex. Does that mean that it works all the time? Of course not. Sometimes feelings do get in the way of friendships. But in my experience, majority of the time it works. And I’m not just saying that because I’m a woman who doesn’t ”get it”, and the guys around me apparently disagree and just hide it.
    LikeDisagree 25 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • Tanisha69

      Yeah the my take is basically bs.

    • MrOracle

      "Not once have any of them tried to make a move or express any sort of attraction."

      As I clearly explained, that's irrelevant. MOST of the time, the guy makes no move nor does he express any overt attraction. That's the whole POINT of this take: women believe that in the absence of these actions, a man must not have sexual attraction to her. But that's usually not the case.

    • lumos

      I don’t think you quite understand how my guy friends work. Like I already said, they’ve been in and out of relationships with other girls. I even matched one of my guy friends with one of my girl friends. Had they been attracted to me at any point, I’d have known.

    • Show All

Most Helpful Guy

  • Belgie
    You should really know better.

    There are women for whom I have zero physical attraction, but I find funny, interesting, brilliant, insightful, or possessing any number of positive traits. And to say I must therefore have no interest in them as people, is not just retarded, but offensive.

    Some of them are "mannish" or even lesbian. Some of them, well, genetics left them with a body that I personally cannot get excited about. And some of them are just not my type, for different reasons.

    And it's not just my age old libido that allows me the pleasure of having female friends. I had several female friends in college that I would never have considered as romantic partners. And I'm fairly certain they thought the same about me.
    Like 14 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • MrOracle

      "There are women for whom I have zero physical attraction, but I find funny, interesting, brilliant, insightful, or possessing any number of positive traits."

      These are exceptions. Exceptions always exist.

      But looking at the hundreds of guys I know, interact with, etc. all the time, very few of them have close friends who they aren't attracted to. Most men generally just don't do that. You do. That's great. Here's a secret: I do too. But I know *I'm* an outlier - an exception. This is a generalization that will apply to MOST people.

    • Belgie

      If you know it's possible, then it's idiotic to say "It can never happen" and assert "FACT!" all over the place.

    • MrOracle

      You just skipped right over the part at the beginning where I acknowledged that every rule has exceptions, right? And since you didn't read it, it doesn't count?

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

4168
  • OlderAndWiser
    I think that what you said may be true for younger guys but it is far less true for older guys.

    First, as I have gotten older, I am less interested in casual sex and more interested in a relationship. That means that I can look at a woman, be sexually attracted to her, and have no desire to pursue a relationship with her. . . not even quick, casual sex. That is how I feel about most younger women. I am exposed to many girls in their late teens and early 20's and I see them as being sexually desirable. . . for someone else. Yes, I can look at a young girl and think that having sex with her would REALLY be hot, fun, wild, etc. but I also know that I will never pursue that. So I can maintain a friendship with them and my sexual attraction will not be a problem.

    Second, I have a fourth category for women: Women to whom I am not attracted but who are interesting, fun, bright, witty, and who have the potential for being a good friend. I don't need a woman to change the oil in my car for her to be useful to me. I don't even need her to bake a cake for me. What I do need is companionship, understanding, and sometimes it is extremely helpful to have a female friend to help me understand a situation in my dating life. This is not just theory. I have had such relationships in my life in the past and I have one such relationship at present.

    To the extent that a guy is ruled by his hormones, you are absolutely correct. Such a guy will probably never have a female friend unless he sees it as a step along the way towards having sex with her. However, I think it oversimplifies men to say that most of us are always ruled by our hormones. (And no, I am not so old that I have lost my libido. It is still quite strong! :) )
    Like 4 People
  • mistixs
    Then why do gay men befriend women then?
    • MrNameless

      gay men aren't attracted to women. and they might have more in common with women than straight men.

      Tune is different with gay men being friends with each other. I imagine its like straight man being attracted to a woman

    • Shy_Steve

      Because straight Men are not interested in Gay Men.

  • snowshy
    This article is idiotic. You reduce men to simpletons who only think of sex and women as users who keep men on the sideline for attention.

    I actually have more respect for my male friends than that and they do with me.
    LikeDisagree 20 People
    • MrOracle

      No, I don't. I'm simply suggesting that sex is always going to be a very strong factor that needs to be acknowledged.

      You think I'm "reducing" men, but I think you're reducing the issue - and that's exactly what I'm trying to address here.

  • Pomegranate139
    So drop all my male friends because they just see me as a potential lay just like the fuckboys. Ok. Got it. All those years of just hanging out and doing fun things was just a long term plan to get in my pants. Yup.
    All this take has told me is that men are incapable of having any thoughts other than sex as long as a woman is involved. I thought guys were more complex than that?
    LikeDisagree 13 People
    • MrOracle

      No, the idea is simply to REALIZE that it's a factor - a powerful factor - and that it WILL affect your relationships. As long as you can accept and handle that, then, no problem. I just think it's better not to be in denial about the realities of the situation - I never said that those realities couldn't be dealt with.

  • BrittBratt2416
    I agree and disagree with the women can't be friends idea. In my opinion, the only way a man and woman can JUST be friends is if both find each other equally physically unattractive. And I say physically cause obviously both of them already like each others personalities, people with similar interests and personalities tend to get a long better otherwise they wouldn't be friends. A friend (for the most part) is someone you DON'T consider a romantic partner because your're not attracted to them in that since. I can't tell you how many male "friends" I've had that at one point saw them as cute or started to see them as somewhat cute but that's because part of me was already attracted to them before we became friends or acquaintances. I see to many stories/questions on here talking about how the girl slept with her male friend and they started a friends with benefits ordeal or is secretly in love with them the whole time and vise versa. That would not happen if there wasn't a sliver of attraction there between them but secretly is. They just didn't know it or was trying to ignore it. Now I do have two co workers who are just friends, she's does not find him attractive and he's not attracted to her and that's what makes their friendship work. So can women and men be friends? Yes of course, but ONLY if both find each other physically unattractive and there's no sexual tension. Cause once one or the other starts seeing them in a different light that's more than just a friendship, its no longer a friendship. It's a secret crush/love or unrequited crush/love relationship that usually makes thing awkward between the two and usually ruins the friendship.
    LikeDisagree 6 People
    • MrOracle

      "Yes of course, but ONLY if both find each other physically unattractive and there's no sexual tension. Cause once one or the other starts seeing them in a different light that's more than just a friendship, its no longer a friendship."

      Exactly right! That's the point I'm trying to get across.

      But the other part is: women VASTLY underestimate men's sexual desire for them, just as men tend to OVERestimate women's sexual desire for men.

    • Ari310

      I dont agree that loving the other person always ruins the friendship. We are really attracted to each other and I believe that we both love each other. We act the part but dont come out and say it.

    • @Ari310 It kind of does, especially if the person doesn't love you back. It's painful for a lot of people to try to remain friends with someone who will never return their feelings. Trying to go back to normal like nothing happened is almost impossible for some which is why a lot men usually walk away from their female friends. They don't want to stick around and be reminded of the pain nor do they want be around long enough to see the guy the girl did give a chance cause that's even more painful.

    • Show All
  • RJGraveyTrain
    I normally agree with you but I don't agree here. I have men I have been friends with for years and we were only ever friends, even when we were both single. I still talk to them and it's never been like that. I think you can't be friends with someone if you don't see them as a friend.
    Like 7 People
    • MrOracle

      YOU can... you're a female. MOST (not all, but most) men can't. I know it might be hard to accept, but I can almost guarantee you that some (if not most) of those male friends have had desires for you. Sure, they may have suppressed them, but they're still there...

    • Lmao. No. Trust me, they don't. Maybe some in the past but not the current ones.

    • harryish

      Just ask them for a session of sex in a serious way and see for yourself. If they are married, chances are less as they won't want themselves to be in trouble but if you have any single friend, try it out. You will probably have the answer. And by asking sex means you have to be very fucking serious about that. The guy should believe that you actually want sex and not just doing any acting.

    • Show All
  • Astoriana
    This is fucking stupid. Rely on stereotypes much? I thought men were supposed to be rational and logical, not slathering beasts led around by their penises. You can be one or the other. Not both.
    LikeDisagree 16 People
    • Men are usually rational and logical, but we do have higher sex drives than women on average. You can thank good ol' testosterone for that. Many guys fantasize about having sex with all types of women, even when they are in relationships, that doesn't mean they will act on it. That said, men usually treat women differently if they are sexually attracted. Yes, they will secretly think about having a romp with you, especially if they have a warm connection with you. If you form a really deep bond with a man, this urge gets crazy because somewhere in the male brain, sex is a bonding ritual with women. It is a way to share feelings, so even though you are just friends, a guy might still want to express himself to you in this way. This doesn't always happen though; it really depends on the friendship and how attractive you are to him physically, mentally, and spiritually.

    • Astoriana

      @freakyzeaky no. You can be one or the other. You are either emotionless or a slave to your emotions. Sexual desire is an emotion.

    • MrOracle

      “The difference between stupid and intelligent people – and this is true whether or not they are well-educated – is that intelligent people can handle subtlety. ”
      ― Neal Stephenson, The Diamond Age: or, A Young Lady's Illustrated Primer

      You're making things black or white - but the real world is full of "shades of grey" - i. e., subtlety. Normally women are experts at subtlety, but for some reason, not with this issue.

    • Show All
  • bloodmountain1990
    I have female friends that are just friends and we leave it as that.

    I love when people complain about being friend zoned by a girl. From my experience, it's better to be friends with someone than an enemy even if you like them more and they don't feel the same way.

    Plus it's a possible way to meet other women that way.

    You can still be their friend without being a doormat.
    Like 9 People
    • MrOracle

      "I have female friends that are just friends and we leave it as that."

      So, you have NO desire to have sex with them, at all? Meaning, if they offered tomorrow for no-strings attached sex, and there would be no consequences, you wouldn't WANT it?

    • Depends on if I find them physically attractive. I've only slept with a friend once.

    • MrOracle

      It's not about what you've DONE as much as it is about what you'd LIKE to do.

      You say that you'd have sex with your female friends (the ones you find attractive, anyway). That essentially means that, even though you DO nothing (overt) towards that interest, it's still going to impact the way you treat her, how much you're willing to put up with from her, and how long you'll stick around. It makes a difference!

      And women need to understand that. It can't be changed, really, but at least if you understand something exists, you can make better-informed decisions.

    • Show All
  • DinaM
    Well, no wonder you can never be friends with women -- you've already made up your mind that it's impossible and just approach women with the intent on fucking them.

    You can say what you like. I have three close male friends. We've been friends for over ten years. Two of them are married (not to each other, but to other women). I assure you, they are not going to cheat ion their wives with me.
    LikeDisagree 7 People
    • davidshaw

      exactly!

    • MrOracle

      "Men in a happy, monogamous relationship already could potentially be “just friends” with women - but in practice, it’s pretty rare."

    • DinaM

      I've been friends with both those guys since before they were married. The third one isn't married and as far as I know not in any kind of relationship. Sorry, but your mytake is so much bull.

    • Show All
  • xolovenina
    I have plenty of guys in my life who are just friends and who think of me as a friend. We give each other relationship advice, we talk about life, we look out of each other just like my girl friends and I do. I don't understand why you don't think it's possible.
    LikeDisagree 7 People
    • MrOracle

      Want to be shocked? Try this: go up and ask them "how would you feel if I told you I wanted to have sex with you, just once, to see what it was like?"

      How many of your "friends" are going to say "look, I get it, but I'm just not attracted to you that way" vs how many will say "Really? When? I'm good to go now..."

      You may not think of them in a sexual way, but that doesn't mean they don't think of YOU in a sexual way. They're MEN, and men are DIFFERENT. But find out for yourself: ASK THEM.

    • unless these guys are gay (which I doubt most of them are) I can tell you right now the thought is floating around their minds. Given your age group these guys are naive. They are keeping you in their "orbit" for possibility...

      I say this because I got brutally friend zoned 3 times in my late teen and early 20s. I stuck around thinking they would change their mind (which I now know will never happen).

      It's okay to be friends with these guys. They made a decision to keep talking to you. But if any of them started showing signals early and you did your friend zone black magic... realize its torture for them.

    • Giacomanzo

      @somewheresomeway that's very, very false. I am a very monogamous person, whenever I see that I like a girl (both mentally and physically) but with whom I know it wouldn't work (for different behaviours or point of views or whatever) I'm good with becoming friends with her, because I am a people person in general.

    • Show All
  • madhatters4
    i disagree. i think it's an insult to men (and sexist) to suggest that men can only view women as objects and base their relationship with them on their looks.

    i'd like to think men are capable of more depth in relationships and see the evidence in my own life
    LikeDisagree 16 People
    • asdaven

      This. Some men might still however. And I know even women who treat men like objects. But a lot of us are good caring gentlemen honestly. I can be friends with a girl for the purpose of having a friendship and not trying to get laid.

    • vyvyn

      @asdaven Not this.

    • asdaven

      @vyvyn Why?

    • Show All
  • itsallover
    If you can't see yourself being just platonic friends with a member of the opposite sex, then you're desperate. Does this mean that you have to drop all of your friends of the opposite sex once you get married/into a serious relationship? Does this mean a man can't be friends with lesbian women, and vice versa? There's so many loopholes in this theory.
    LikeDisagree 26 People
    • itsallover

      Sorry - gay man can't be friends with other gay men*

    • Coming from a man, I think most men do not have an abundance with women. It is a scarcity mentality and insecurity that causes men to find it difficult to suppress their sexual desires for women, including women. If a man is in high demand, it is easy for him to dismiss his attraction, unless she is exceptional and he is persistent with her.

      Naturally, most men aren't in high demand. Imagine a man who finds you sexually attractive, gets to know you very well, builds a great rapport, but can never act on his desires and doesn't have many other outlets for that desire. He might resent the fact that he isn't attractive to you or the fact that you are unavailable. He might be able to be friends, but struggle to stop thinking about you lustfully, which makes him act differently than he would towards a friend he isn't attracted to.

      For most women, I think it is easier to suppress those desires, but it can be tough for either sex in that situation.

    • *including women friends

    • Show All
  • Deydey12345
    Exactly. Sir you are right on!
    You are very intelligent I must say for understanding these things from 2 different point if view and you are fucking right.
    But some people are dumb and will keep disagreeing.
    Thanks for taking the time to write this truth.
    LikeDisagree 13 People
  • Thankful7
    Um this post is freaking me out!
    My boyfriend is super friendly with a girlstripper from his workwork, he calls her regularly outside work hours, they hang outside of work, she sent text messages I've seen end with xx , he's says she's "hot"!!
    When I've expressed im not comfortable with their friendship, he said they are close friends its a brother and sister like friendship. This post has me feeling like its not :-[ likely...
    Like 4 People
    • Thankful7

      Should read "girl from his work"

    • MrOracle

      The thing is, if that GIRL decides she's not going to sleep with him, then they won't sleep together. And girls "friendzone" guys all the time. But think about it: if every guy didn't want to sleep with her, why would she NEED a friendzone?

      I'm not saying he will cheat - guys CAN be attracted to women, and WANT sex with them, but control themselves and not actually DO it. But the honest truth is that the temptation to do it will be strong, and some guys just don't have the will to resist (and some won't even bother to TRY to resist, but those guys are assholes anyway).

    • Thankful7

      Thanks for your reply.
      Im completely uncomfortable now, already was but now more.

    • Show All
  • LeoLionEye
    I half agree with what you say half not. I don't believe men and women can be friends easily because one is more than likely to develop feelings. That makes sense tho since you muse have something in common with the person in the first place to become friends. But your a guy and she's a girl so it's possible for you to be more and as you get to know each other that possible can grow and be what you now desire. So no I don't think men and women in most cases can be friends.

    What I really don't agreen on is that this is based upon men wanting to have sex. This whole take makes it seem like guys think only about sex. That isn't true. It's kind of infuriating that you believe men are only capable of such shallow emotions. Real men are much more then the animals you paint in this take. Having sex is not my number two priority next to survival. I wouldn't say that it would actually make top 10. If you honestly believe this then I can see why you feel like men and women can't be friends, it's probably because most women think you are a creepy sex crazed prev and want nothing to do with you.
    LikeDisagree 2 People
    • MrOracle

      First of all, none of this is about ME personally - it's about what I have observed for decades, and about the people that have come to me for advice, or confided their feelings, or things I've overheard. But read the studies and watch the videos - which are from very different places than I've been, and come to the exact same conclusions. It isn't just me.

    • LeoLionEye

      I said I agreed with you on men and women not being able to be friends. I don't agree with your reasoning why. Which is your opinion based on experience you had or people you know. So yes it is about you personally since it is your opinion. Not once during any of those video did anyone say that it was because men having a desire to have sex with most women he meets. That was your own personal opinion you put on all of this and that is what I am saying is wrong.

      You may believe that you and other men in your life are slaves to their own sexual desires but that isn't true for all men so stop claiming it to be. Just because you can't control your desires and urges don't claim none of us can. I'm not this sex craved animal you called a man you taliked about in this take. And in all honesty it's insulting to be considered so one dimensional. Men and women can't easily be friends because of emotions, one of which is sexual desire, but it is far from the only one in play for this.

    • MrOracle

      "Not once during any of those video did anyone say that it was because men having a desire to have sex with most women he meets. That was your own personal opinion you put on all of this and that is what I am saying is wrong."

      I intentionally picked videos that were more subtle about it - trying not to freak people out TOO much - but there are plenty of examples where there is NO ambiguity about what the issue is.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEV_pQIf3Og

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zywIR_ZFLts

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjFWLVPfoHQ

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fStyPQoIrEs

    • Show All
  • Unit1
    As someone, who actually has *just* female friends (some of who are taken) I have only one GIF in response to this.

    https://i.imgur.com/TWgvzFt.gif

    Your efforts to prove as you claimed are invalid and it's definitely not the truth. Sorry.
    LikeDisagree 13 People
  • Tanisha69
    BS that applies to some guys, and some guy-girl friendships. Other guys and girls can be friends without hidden desires for sex. The fact that you don't know this speaks to your own inexperience and shallowness.
    LikeDisagree 18 People
    • Alright. Keep living in your own fantasy

    • Tanisha69

      @lord_chilled Maybe you are in the fantasy! The fantasy where all guy-girl friendships work like yours.

    • They mostly do. I think a lot of you girls buy into it, but i dont think i have even met one single guy, who was 100% convinced in himself that he was really just "friends" with a girl.
      99% of the guys wanna do the girl, and a similar amount of guys actually have a full blown crush.
      Just recently my roomie was having a drink with a guy who had been in a platonic relationship with a girl for quite some time.. We expected him to be the exeption, but it turned out he had wanted her since he was a teen.

      Now i may just be saying that out of my own life experiences, but i can tell when a guy likes a girl, and even when i can't, to my knowledge, it always turned out in a friendship the guy was into the woman

    • Show All
  • BronzedAdonis
    I disagree, way too many generalisations and you're speaking on everyone's else's behalf as if it's fact, not opinion.
    LikeDisagree 13 People
    • MrOracle

      Of COURSE I'm making generalizations. Do I need to interview 7 billion people before I write an article? This isn't a scientific journal, it's an opinion website.

      But there are plenty of links and examples, so it's not like mine is a lone voice in the wilderness...

    • Still disagree

  • lord_chilled
    I have been preaching this for as long as i can remember.
    At least for platonic friendship that is. I mean if a guy wants to fuck a girl, but she doesn't and decides just to "friend" him , and you can call that a friendship, i guess we can be friends.
    But for me i dont think thats true friendship. True fruendship is unconditional to me and only a small circle of guys can i call my true loyal friends, let alone any woman.
    Everytime i did try to be friends with a female, it turned out that i started liking her, or she started liking me, thus no longer being "just friends".

    Sadly, about 80% in the comments dont really understand what you said, because they couldnt grasp the out of box thinking.
    All they saw was "men want to fuck women, so we can't be friend. Well thats not true!!! " ...
    Thry dont understand the concept.
    Also, a lot of girls tend to get emotions involved in it, and dont wanna belive guys are like this because they think it makes all men "bad".
    Its not bad, its just our nature. There is no harm involved.

    I had this discussion with my sister a few weeks ago where she believed that amen and women could be friends and i argued we can't because of the same reasons you said.
    Turns out she still believes we can, and the only effect it had was her thinking im a horndog that can't be helped 😂😂
    LikeDisagree 4 People
    • Sorry about all the spell errors. I use my phone. Tiny buttons and big hands man 😅

  • Dog19
    I've been told that men only want sex from women and if a man is friends with a woman or girl and doesn't want sex or has more interest than just sex than that means he's gay and loves sex with men. Since woman are told that they're sole purpose in life is to be sex slaves to men and be their house maid...
    Like 2 People
    • MrOracle

      There's some truth in your first sentence, but it's not completely the truth.

      Men DO fall in love - genuine love. But - just as it is with women - it's pretty rare.

      The difference - which women struggle so hard to understand and accept - is that, unlike women, men do NOT limit their SEXUAL interests to their ROMANTIC interests.

      Women mostly only want sex from a guy she already has an emotional connection with - which limits her sexual interest to a very small pool of men at any one time. Men have no such limits - rather, men want SEX (and ONLY sex) from EVERY WOMAN HE FINDS ATTRACTIVE. Again, this doesn't mean he can't fall in love - but when he's "in between" loves, his sex drive isn't in any way diminished, and he doesn't limit his potential sex partners to women he could potentially fall in love with - his only limit is: "is she attractive?" If the answer is "yes", he wants to bang her. He may not TRY to, but he WANTS to.

    • Men will entertain the idea and if presented with the opportunity, they would probably act on it all things considered such as current relationship status and religious convictions.

      Think to yourself, if I came on to my guy friend, would he be receptive? I am guessing the answer will be yes more times than not, especially if you are both available. Most guys would have no problem escalating to a friends with benefits if his decently attractive platonic woman friend showed the desire for it.

    • MrNameless

      If men were raised in an environment to objectify women and see them as nothing but that, then yes. But vast vast majority of men don't see women as commodities. A lot of this has to do with cultural upbringing and popular culture.

      I will tell you that the vast majority of men will not go out of their way to spend a significant time alone with women unless they are interested in some way with them. Romantic or sexual

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