To All the Bitter and Lonely Men Out There: Nobody Owes You a Thing!

[Anonymous]

Before I begin let me tell you a little about myself; I am a 23, 6’, 300lbs man who has never been on a date with a girl let alone have a relationship or sex. Like many other men out there I was extremely bitter about the whole situation.

I wondered why other guys had such great luck with girls and had fulfilling relationships and sex lives, while I had nothing but envy for those guys. An envy that grew into bitterness, and which clouded my judgement. Instead of looking inward to see my own weaknesses and areas in need of improvement, I externalized this and projected my problems on to other people.

I thought to myself that all women wanted an Adonis and would settle for no less than perfection. I thought to myself, why would any women want me when they could find and probably have already been with a man who was well-endowed. I thought to myself, why would any women want a man who doesn’t have a six pack and is ugly. These negative thoughts and so many more clouded my judgement so much that I was beginning to lose touch between what was the truth and what were gross generalizations.

Now, let me tell you the bitter truth I had to realize on my own. The issues that I had worried about were nobody else’s problem but my own. It was difficult to realize that all my negative views on women, dating, sex, relationships, etc. were based primarily on irrational thinking and time spent away from reality reading the postings of random people on the internet.

It was my poor attitude that was holding me back and made me even more depressed and bitter than I already was. After the clouds had cleared I realized just how irrational my thinking was in seeing women as some evil force out there oppressing nice guys and banging every big dicked stud they came across. I realized the simple fact that women do not owe me anything, that I shouldn’t be nice to them just so I can get into their pants but to just be nice for the sake of it.

I am still a virgin and have never dated, but now I am working towards eliminating that divide I created between myself and women. Today I believe strongly in issues such as the importance of consent, a women’s right over her own body, that it is okay for a woman to be sex positive and open with her sexuality, and the belief in treating women as equals. As I improve myself I become ever more confident that one day I may be able to find someone who can love me.

I know that trying to rationalize with the bitter and depressed is a Sisyphean task and usually turns into flogging a dead horse, but I honestly hope that another guy in a similar situation as myself can take some advice from this and to work on improving his negative attitude and discovering how he can improve the situation he is in.

[Anonymous]

Another Feminist white knight trying to justify why Men should accept women as their masters.
You can accept women as your master but I won't. I have self respect and I know how to stand up for myself.

Feminism has gone too far. The #MeToo movement has gone too far. Women have gone too far. It’s a witch hunt.

The idea that a liberation movement for women has gone "too far" is a common one, an admonishment designed to make us feel like naughty schoolgirls. Patriarchy is maintained in part by keeping women in our place and punishing us when we dare to step outside of it.

1. Women ride cock carousel in her teens and wants you to accept her as your wife later on. (Fuck it)

2. Women can charge fake rape charges against you without any reason and police will take you ass to jail. (Fuck it)

3. Women can cheat on you and you're still expected to tolerate the abuse from women (fuck it)

4. Women shouldn't pay on dates , shouldn't earn for family but still wants equality. (Fuck it)

5. If you have a small dick, your a chump - If she has a loose vagina then you get the reason that vagina don't get loose after too much sex. (Fuck it)

6. If you have a divorce with a woman, she will automatically get te possession of kids, and half of your entire wealth (fuck it)

7. Women will manipulate their father, brothers, husbands, boyfriends every man in their life but still demand respect from men. (Fuck it)

8. Law say, Women cannot rape but man can. The reality is 80 % of reported rapes were the ones where women initiated flirting.

9. Women won't make the first move on the guy , they still hope guy should come up to them and lick their feet. And if the guy is not interested in her, he is an as whole.

10. If you don't satisfy her physically, emotionally, financially, the reality is she will dump your sorry ass and find someone better. Women are very opportunistic that way.

11. If a woman hits a man , she can easily lie about domestic violence. But if a man hits a woman he's a female basher, anti women and a devil.

I refuse to be a cuck.
I refuse to bow to feminists.
I was a born as a free man and I will as a free man.

[TheUglyMan]

😭😭😭😭😢😭beautiful

[Rissyanne]

So you believe that if a woman flirts with you... you have the right to have sex with her?

[TheUglyMan]

@Rissyanne lol of course not

[martinxcv]

This should be rated as the best speech, reply ever on any form of social media. All very true points. Can't you make a mytake like this.

[Opinion Owner]

@martinxcv The admins never approve my take from me on this topic.
But gag is just a small shit, they can curb my voice here but how long can truth be shut?

Growing Mgtow trend is a clear indication that men are getting aware the manipulative behaviour of sluts. I wish men luck.

[martinxcv]

So i was right about this site and mytakes.

[Rissyanne]

If women are terrible... maybe you date a guy.

[martinxcv]

@Rissyanne Women need to change instead of thinking it the other way round.

[Rissyanne]

@martinxcv No if you hate women so much... then stay away from. Date men.

[martinxcv]

@Rissyanne No women should change and be made to change.

[Opinion Owner]

@martinxcv there is no need to change women.
These feminist women are free prostitutes.
Just bang them and have fun with them.
However, when it comes to marriage, you must make an intelligent decision by chosing the nice virgin type of woman.

[Rissyanne]

You guys will never get a woman. Maybe after they get your approval number on your mastercard. And I am not a feminist.

[Truthatanycost]

@martinxcv Yes. This site regularly blocks and deletes raw truth. I've had many comments deleted. If you lie, none of your comments will ever be removed. It's the same all around the net. But truth stands alone, and even with no voice it can still be heard.

[JamesRandiDebates]

@Rissyanne If a woman is flirting, she wants to have sex. Hence, why she was flirting in the first place.

[Rissyanne]

@JamesRandiDebates you really don’t know women. I’ve flirted with many men that I had no intention of having sex with.

[JamesRandiDebates]

@Rissyanne Only when you're trying to get something from them

[Rissyanne]

@JamesRandiDebates what the hell would want from them?

[JamesRandiDebates]

@Rissyanne I'd guess you want money.

[Rissyanne]

@JamesRandiDebates I don’t need a man’s money. I make my own.

[JamesRandiDebates]

@Rissyanne BWAHAHAHAHAHA

[Rissyanne]

@JamesRandiDebates you need to lay off that weed

[JamesRandiDebates]

@Rissyanne Go back to your Gofundme page.

[Rissyanne]

@JamesRandiDebates dude stop being so bitter just because you can’t get a woman.

[JamesRandiDebates]

@Rissyanne I'm not at all bitter. And I get plenty of pussy, thanks.

[Rissyanne]

@JamesRandiDebates then why are you whining

[JamesRandiDebates]

@Rissyanne In what way am I whining? I merely made a factual statement relative to this thread. You're the one who seems all butt hurt

[Rissyanne]

@JamesRandiDebates you are so ignorant that you think if a woman flirts with you she wants to have sex with you. Lol

[JamesRandiDebates]

@Rissyanne You seem to have run out of anything even remotely articulate to say. Don't you have a GoFundMe page to check? You might be up to 20 bucks by now.

[JamesRandiDebates]

@Rissyanne And, yes, any woman who flirts with me is either trying to sell me something or she wants some dick.

[Rissyanne]

@JamesRandiDebates you just stupid

[ernward]

59, divorced and wife was fucking around behind my back,

Yep, love was blind and so was the court system who gave her 1/2 plus more of my things. Was bitter against women for at least 10 years and got me no where.

Finally had some interest in a woman who was too and she just was in it for a free ride too. Just bitched how broke she was... she sold a business and her house, yet expected me to pick up the tab whenever we went out. Not to mention, she lied about her age by actually being 10 years older. I thought I was doing right by meeting someone who was more level in the world and still screwed over again.

I am not giving up and know there is a lady out there for me. I don't want to be the old guy who comes into Burger King alone for dinner and they all know his name and his order. Life has to be more than that!

Yes, time is still ticking and no maybe I should not be as selective, but want to meet the right lady out there. Aging alone will not be my idea of a good time.

[Rissyanne]

@ernward the right lady is out there for you

[TenderFantasy]

Wow so much generalizations in this post... unbelievable. = ( You just pointing out things that a man can do as well! Minus of course the gendered ones... For example, men can be very opportunistic as well! Not just women! And that's just the tip of the ice berg in terms of what's wrong wit this post of yours!

[HereIbe]

How CUTE! You can't get any pussy, so you're bitter and resentful.

Pathetic.

[lumos]

Thank you for sharing this, and I'm so happy that you've realized these things on your own. Your self-awareness is great. Dating and relationships doesn't boil down to abs or perfection. Like sure, those things MIGHT help a little, but if you're in it for the long run, you're going to be looking for something way deeper than that. Having a nasty attitude and prejudice towards potential mates is not going to help in any way. Anyone who ever decides to talk to someone with that kind of mindset will notice that pretty fast and run for the hills - nobody wants to date someone who's so self-absorbed and bitter.
I fully respect how you've changed your outlook to a more positive and confident one. It's all positive change from here, and I'm sure everyone around you will notice that. Don't listen to anyone calling you a "white knight". Those are just the same dudes who have nothing better to do than whine about the fact that a woman didn't drop their panties for them because they held the door open.

[TheUglyMan]

No because guys know exactly were this will lead to. Failure and the take owner being a slave to the gynocracy

[lumos]

@TheUglyMan booohooo maybe if you spent less time on the internet and more time in the real world actually interacting with people f2f you'd be more successful and less scared of "failure"

[TheUglyMan]

Trust me I've tried. I've done all I could. I've played hundreds of dollars, approached over 100 women. I have tried everything.

[VaIiant]

@TheUglyMan you're the kinda guy this Take was exactly about.

[lumos]

@TheUglyMan so paying money and approaching tons of women is how you're magically supposed to get into a relationship? Sorry but that's just not how it works, and like this take perfectly demonstrated, nobody owes you anything. It's not surprising at all that guys like you can't find a girl, because you treat girls like machines. Put 10 coins into the machine and win your own real girlfriend who will cater to you in every single way she can! After all, you paid 10 whole coins! Wow!
@Valiant lol exactly.

[lumos]

@VaIiant *

[Bluemax]

"so paying money and approaching tons of women is how you're magically supposed to get into a relationship?"

No, it certainly doesn't. However, I would suggest that simply not being bitter or angry at women won't get a guy into a relationship either, as I've known many who aren't bitter about women, never were, and who have never been in relationships. More needs to be done.

"Dating and relationships doesn't boil down to abs or perfection. Like sure, those things MIGHT help a little"

I would suggest they help much more than most people are willing to admit. Which is why perhaps the myTakeOwner, while doing a very admirable job in reflecting on himself, might want to consider losing some of those 300 pounds.

[TheUglyMan]

I wish I could explain to you. I've done everything, dating coaches you name it. Done it all. Most of the money I spent was on the rip off dating coaches. im single because I'm ugly and poor that's it. And I don't treat women like machines. You don't even know me lol.

[TheUglyMan]

@VaIiant I uses to be simp when I was younger
that changed. When i saw the truth. And what kind of guy am I? 🤔

[lumos]

@Bluemax I also never said that a more positive mindset is all you need. But that certainly helps a lot more than abs in the long run, considering that looks fade and many women don't even care about abs. I know I don't.

@TheUglyMan you just keep explaining to me how much money you've spent. And yet you want to claim you don't see women as machines you just put your coins into so that you can get stuff. Do you not even realize how much you're contradicting yourself?

[TheUglyMan]

Nevermind😪, I'll just end it off like this. No matter how well you dress, how nice , respectful or whatever people tell you. If you ugly and or poor just give up. The take owner has no results just a rant and a "positive attitude " he should give up what he's doing won't help him.

[Bluemax]

"I also never said that..."

Yes, I know you didn't. From what you did say, I could see people easily inferring it, which is why I said what I said.

"considering that looks fade"

Indeed, but I've often argued that they have a greater staying power than most people either realize or are willing to admit. Besides, when done right it takes decades for them to fade, which is a significant portion of any long term relationship.

Whereas you aren't interested in abs, can we agree that the majority, perhaps the overwhelming majority of people, men and women alike, do not find obesity physically attractive?

I maintain that's true of most people, so in order to maximize his chances, the myTakeOwner might wish to consider losing weight.

[Halligan]

@TheUglyMan I knew several guys over 6’, over 300lbs who still got dates. One had a hard time keeping them because of full body psoriasis. But he was married before, he had periodic LTR. His girlfriends were smokin’. He wasn’t rich, but he was one of the funniest guys I hung out with.

Get some hobbies, develop a better outlook on life. Have self confidence. Those things are more attractive than money and a 6 pack, both can easily fade.

[Unit1]

Lumos did it again 😀👍👍👍 you're funny 😁

[steevo]

Quote: "Don't listen to anyone calling you a "white knight". Those are just the same dudes who have nothing better to do than whine about the fact that a woman didn't drop their panties for them because they held the door open."
Males who open doors for women are suffering under FEMALE privilege. Totally sexist and objectifying men - as door openers. How demeaning to men...
Not opening a door for a female leads to harsh name-calling, derogatory remarks, man-shaming and whatever non-equality gender-specific slanderous non-words can be applied to these man-slaves. LOL
Equality means you should open a door, just try!

[lumos]

@steevo boohoo

[Unit1]

Look at those butthurt guys and entitled guys 😆
It's unbelievable to see them actually existing and then believing that "womyn shud gib me tha pusi or else they r sloots". Like really? They are throwing all logic, perspective and reasoning away and then respond rather just emotionally nonsense from merely their viewpoint. They obviously have no respect for women and i think they deserve what they got by being single and undesired.

[steevo]

LOL.

[TheUglyMan]

This thread is old now let it die please.

[VaIiant]

@TheUglyMan I can see the salt from being schooled leaking out of your pores. Same with them guy above you, who thinks opening a door for a woman is a crime. Opening doors for anyone is a kind gesture- I do it all the time.

[TheUglyMan]

@VaIiant no one should open doors for women. Unless the women is unable to.

[lumos]

@TheUglyMan people should hold the doors open for other people. I do it all the time, and I thank the ones who hold it open for me. Get that stick out of your own ass.

[VaIiant]

@TheUglyMan not just women, you dumbass. Read what I said. It’s a common courtesy to hold it open for others.

[TheUglyMan]

@VaIiant ok

[Unit1]

It's no wonder why guys like him will never find a girlfriend.

[TheUglyMan]

@Unit1 who me?

[joeblow123]

Don't listen to anyone calling you a "white knight". Those are just the same dudes who have nothing better to do than whine about the fact that a woman didn't drop their panties for them because they held the door open.

Wrong. The issues that these men complain about are injustices against them. From the family court that rewards women no matter what they do and punishes men whether they deserve it or not. To the criminal courts than hand men more time than women. Where women are given the option to testify against the man (the reverse is unheard of) even if she is the mastermind. Also female murderers are spared the death penalty while men who murder are not. To the civil courts that blindly take her word in sexual harassment cases and heavily fines the man. Whether he deserves it or not. To the general society that favor women over men. There is no such thing as institutionalized misogyny but there is institutionalized misandry and it is running amok in western societies.

[joeblow123]

Bro, don't let these women bring you down. Search for pick up artist videos. Something to help give you pointers on how to deal with the opposite sex. Also build up your confidence. That would help.

[joeblow123]

@Unit1 Being a mangina suck up doesn't help either.

[Unit1]

@joeblow123 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[lumos]

@joeblow123 ok thanl you for the tangent that had nothing to do with my opinion

[joeblow123]

Actually I did answer correctly. You're the one who is assuming what I wrote is irrelevant. As far as discounting male pain goes I could do the same to you. Example: Your boyfriend beat you up? Boohoo. Who cares.

[lumos]

@joeblow123 except that I wasn’t addressing guys who have legitimate struggles that they go through, I addressed the guys who attacked the mytake writer and called him a ”white knight” for no reason. Then you went off and tried to turn it into something it isn’t.

[VaIiant]

@joeblow123 guys like you are the definition of men who will never have a long lasting relationship

[mattl338]

A lot of guys here are being actual fools, you lumos spoke the truth and I agree! :D also why did 19 guys downvote this? o. O

[Logorithim]

That's good, but even if you don't want to lose weight, there are plenty of bigger women who won't have a problem with it. I do recommend that you lose as much as you can, i. e., down to 200 or so, if you can. But do it for yourself. The main thing is for you to build confidence.

[Barrabus_the_Free]

So you turned to being a soyboy, thinking that would get you laid?

Look, you were right about all the things you claim you used to think.

But where you went wrong is, you internalized and started hating. Hating yourself for not living up to those standards, no matter how unrealistic they are. Hating females for being what they are, which they can't help.

And then you went the wrong way with it.

You were exactly correct in your thoughts before. What you should have done is accept that that's the way it is, and either work to become that ideal or say "To hell with it" and just do whatever you want, and not give the entire thing any more thought.

You can only change you. You can't change what women want, you can't make them actually start being loyal, you can't make them not be completely mercenary in their interactions with men, you can't change the fact that they'll run off and fuck some guy that makes their pussy tingle even though they've been in a relationshit with another guy for years.

You. Can't. Change. Anything. Except. Yourself.

Your physique. Whether you accept reality or try mental gymnastics so the fantasy continues. How you interact with others. Whether you get what you want out of life or you become a doormat.

It sounds like you're some kind of male feminist. SMH... Put down the feminazi propaganda. Stop eating anything with soy or high fructose corn syrup. Start lifting heavy things. Go for a walk. Eventually change that to a run. When you want something, don't be shy about it. Be assertive and, when the situation warrants it, aggressive. Don't apologize any more, unless you do something to a friend. Don't even consider apologizing for or accepting any of the blame for things that aren't your fault, and especially not for made up bulldrek like "Muh Wage Gap" or "Muh paytreearky".

Eat right. Exercise. Do the things you enjoy regardless of what anyone else thinks. Be assertive and confident. Forget all the bulldrek you've been fed about women, and start doing what the guys that have a lot of success do (hint, it doesn't involve kissing their asses, 'respecting' them, or buying stuff).

Most importantly, stop giving a damn what anyone thinks about you. You'd be surprised how many people start to like or admire you, how many women get attracted to you, etc, when you simply stop giving any shits what other people think and do exactly whatever the hell YOU want.

Good luck!

[TonyBologna25]

Self awareness is great, but you're being asinine if you think that it's simply your attitude that is holding you back. Yeah, that's a huge factor and women don't want to be around a debby-downer, but you also have to know that you're limiting your dating potential by being 300lbs. Younger women do want attractive men.

Also-- if you want to be successful with women sexually, you have to learn how to escalate. Part of that means that you have to push some social boundaries. It turns a lot of women on to be able to do that knowing the likelihood of rejection. Women like a man who gets what he wants. Not a man who tip-toes around the idea of having sex with them. So I'd drop the feminist attitude if you actually want to get laid. There's a distinct difference between giving a woman unwanted sexual attention, and getting her hot and horny for you with the right kind of escalation.

In all, it sounds like you got a good head on your shoulders, and it also sounds like you're desperately trying to seek some answers as to why you're still unsuccessful with women. You don't quite have it figured out from what I can gather, but it will come. Having a positive mindset in general will benefit you in so many ways. So keep searching and keep experimenting. You'll figure it out if you keep trying. Find that balance. Find out who you really are and what you like. It comes with age.

One tip of advice that I'd give you is that women are not the same as men. I like your idea as you treat them equally, but that only applies in certain aspects. Don't put them on a pedestal, and don't treat them like shit. Give them the same amount of respect that you would a man in other words. Having said that, women operate and are attracted to a lot of different things in comparison to men. You need to treat women like women if you want them to treat you like a man. You'll realize this once you get some dating experience.

I was a bodybuilder in college and got a lot of pussy. Been in two serious long term relationships so this is my experience. By no means am I dictating, or deeming my advice to be absolute and bulletproof. This is what I have learned and what works for me though. BTW-- if you want some help on the weightloss, shoot me a DM and I'll customize a diet plan, and workout routine that's tailored specifically towards you.

People used to pay for me this, but I get a lot of sanctification helping guys down on their luck out. Seeing that transformation is really satisfying and I'd love to be a part of it if I want the help. Goodluck man

[LogicBomber]

Let me start by giving you some info on myself... I am a very in shape, 5'9 male, white male, with a larger than average penis, who has had sex with many women. I am currently married to a female who looks like a cross between Kate Beckinsale and Jennifer Connolly. But like you, I drank the gynocentric kool-aid and believed the dumb shit you just spouted back in my youth. I know better now.

Being a fat virgin male feminist is NOT going to get women interested in you. Believing that there is a "rape culture" or wage gap just proves you are unable to think logically. These are proven in seconds with even a slight bit of research.
99% of men know not to rape, and very few men rape. The Bureau of justice statistics (gold star in crime stats) show it is less than 1 in 1000 (including an estimate for the "90%" fabricated group that doesn't come forward. It doesn't exclude the 40% of accusations that are false.)

Society already treats women as MORE than equal! Western society is gynocentric. Women get endless support, funding, clubs, groups, shelters, protection, 100% parental rights, a school system bias in their favor, a court and police system bias in their favor, etc.
We, males, are raised from childhood to provide and protect women, to put our health and well-being second to women. While women are raised to expect this from males.
We remove all obstacles for women so they can feel equal but it doesn't stop them from playing victim.

Women already have freedom of sexuality. It's ok for a woman to openly talk about sex, go to strip clubs (where they are grotesquely perverse), female sex toys make 14 billion a year and can be openly talked about, sold at Walmart next to lube, and they have "fantasia" parties. Women can be sexually aggressive.
Men are shamed and attacked for their sexuality. We are perverts for having a natural interest in women. Going to strip clubs, having sex toys, masturbating, etc. Think about it, male masturbation and nudity are considered gross while female masturbation and orgasm are used to sell shampoo for fuck sake. Female nudity is considered ok even in public and around children.

You are right in the fact that you should work on yourself. But adhering to the bullshit feminist nonsense will NOT win over women. Stop thinking that being a white knight will get you pussy. Unless you lose some weight and man the fuck up (Or win a massive lottery), you will never get a female.

[Celtero]

First of all, fuck you for feeling the need to remind me, secondly... 300 lbs? No shit women don't want to date you. If anything's holding you back it's your appetite and laziness, not your poor attitude.

The irony is that women'll praise you here but they'd never dream of touching you in real life.

Now, there's guys out there who are not obese, they're simply short, ugly, or don't have a sexy personality. These are things they can't control, and they don't get women either. Telling them that they just need to have a positive attitude... that's insulting. People are allowed to be angry when they've been dealt a shitty hand.

The truth is, you've got absolutely no credibility. Why should anybody listen to you when you'r'e still a virgin after changing your attitude? You haven't once mentioned dieting or exercise, so for all we know you're still delusional and think that you're entitled to a girl because you're positive.

The reality is that you've just jumped on the bandwagon of people who hate and shame men who have problems with women and are angry about it, so you'll be accepted in at least some regard by the girls you so dearly crave.

[TheUglyMan]

Preach brother.

[Bachnalian]

Excellent reply. The entire time I read it I was thinking, no this nice guy routine ain't going to work for him either. He'll really be disappointed when he finds out chicks aren't as in to nice guys as they claim.

[castratedwhiteguy]

Interesting theory, but it has already failed the reality test!

Dude! I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but this politically correct approach to women will only create more problems for you than it solves. My advice?

1. Forget about women for right now and just concentrate on making self improvements that will make YOU feel better about yourself.

2. Lose some fucking weight! Not to attract women, but to avoid dying young of a heart attack at 40 years of age.

3. Start working out and get fucking ripped!

4. Concentrate on your career! You'll need an above average income that nobody can take away from you.

5. When you're ready financially, the McMansion and the expensive care an absolute necessity.

If you can discipline yourself now to complete these five steps than your relationship with women will automatically improve exponentially! Why? Because you'll have transformed yourself into a "catch" or an "alpha male" so you'll have more women chasing after you that you'll possibly have time for. Give it a try! Hope this helps...

[Wally48]

@ Anonymous Pay attention to this guy. Most of what he says is true.

[martinxcv]

@Wally48 Everything he says is bullshit

[Wally48]

@martinxcv So you think being, fat, poor and slovenly is the way to attract girls?

[martinxcv]

@Wally48 I meant that the @asker

[Wally48]

@martinxcv Oh yes I understand now. Problem with this guy's take is although he's getting over his anger, he's going to be frustrated and angry once again because it doesn't sound like he's doing much to fix the underlying problems.

[Wally48]

@martinxcv castratedwhiteguy although a little zealous, is mostly correct.

[castratedwhiteguy]

@Wally48 Thanks!

[Unit1]

Big respect to you my man! Well done! It's really good, that you have figured out how it works and it's a wonder.

It's funny to see how you have addressed those types of (bitter and lonely) guys and their actual problem and rather than taking the hint they resort to ad hominem or defensive counterstrikes and call you a white knight (been there, done that).

In fact those types of guys, that you have described have actually responded to you with those attacks and upvote the others of their alikes.

www.researchsnipers.com/.../wow-player-794289.jpg

But so what. They have made their choice as did we all at this point.

I was there, where you were myself and your description is on point! Fortunately I was able to be redeemed in time. Now recently I have managed to find an amazing lady looking forward to spend time with me again :)

Being nice is just one thing and can get you only so far.
Being a good person without feeling those entitlements will get you going and you are the driver. Don't crash.

[TheUglyMan]

You do realise he still hasn't been laid. He's had the same results his always had lol. He's just jumping on the white knight hype train.

[Jon_25]

@TheUglyMan Why are you so upset by this MyTake? So what if he hasn't "gotten laid" yet, that's not the point here. The point is he had a problem, recognized it, and is trying to fix it. All of this internally. It has nothing to do with outside relationships, that will just hopefully be a side effect once he has dealt with the actual issue. He isn't saying all men have this problem, he's just trying to help point in the right direction those who may. This isn't about you or getting laid, it's about what worked for HIM in HIS situation to fix HIS own problem. If you don't have this problem that's fine. Some people do, including him, and he's just trying to tell them what he has seen could help.

[TheUglyMan]

@Jon_25 the point is he's heading the wrong direction

[Jon_25]

@TheUglyMan Well why is that, and where's your right direction, if you care to explain?

[TheUglyMan]

@Jon_25 he was better off the way he was the only positive is that he's taking some responsibility and not blaming everything but himself.

[Jon_25]

@TheUglyMan What is DIFFERENT from how he was besides his taking responsibility and not blaming people for his problems? You still haven't given an alternative.

[Pamina]

Great answer!

[TheUglyMan]

@Jon_25 he should leave women completely focus on his career, family and friends.

[Jon_25]

@TheUglyMan Where did you read that he wasn't focusing on his career, family, and friends? He isn't focusing on women anymore. How is your solution counter to his? How does this improve his standing any more than what he's done?

[TheUglyMan]

@Jon_25 I'm saying he should focus on those three aspects. Not saying he wasn't focusing on them he possibly could be but we don't know that do we?

[Jon_25]

@TheUglyMan So then ask that. There doesn't seem to be anything wrong with what he's doing though. It's fine if you think he should do more, or add another aspect, but if you don't think what he's doing is bad don't just assume it's all he's ever gonna do. You're pretty reasonable. Start out with this point next time and lots of people will take what you say more seriously. It's a perfectly valid point. I agree.

[Unit1]

@Pamina
😊 that's how it is.

[Jon_25]

@Astria
Did you block me? I can't add an opinion on your question "how many people did you block so far?" What'd I do that made you block me?

[TheUglyMan]

@Jon_25 you have different opinion that's why you got blocked

[Jon_25]

@TheUglyMan I don't see why she blocked me for that. Can't even up or down vote her comments. I can see why she's blocked 98 people so far if I made
her so mad. 😅

[Unit1]

@Jon_25 astria blocked me too 😆
That tells a lot about herself. She's a B.

[Unit1]

@Jon_25 I'm blocking people back permanently and they're out of my sight, out of my mind. I recommend you do the same.

[cth96190]

I am bitter and I was filled with anger, but even from where I stand I can tell you that you are making a mistake.
You are morphing into a blue-pill mangina, which is what women say that they want but is actually 180 degrees to what they really want.
Ignore everything that women say. Instead, watch for whom they spread their legs. It is always that criminal-looking sociopathic bad boys who are the opposite of what you seek to become.
The transformation that you say you are undertaking will result in the Friend Zone, at best.
If you want women, you need to go to a gym, lose all the excess weight, becomes dedicated student of a martial art and present a more masculine appearance.
Even join the National Guard (I assume that you are in the USA).
You almost certainly need a makeover, too.
Find an up-market male boutique and have the (probably gay) men who work there give you a new wardrobe and a whole new look. I hate to admit it, but queer men have much better dress sense than straight men.
Read some books on communication, such as Dale Carnegie's How To Win Friends And Influence People; Anthony Robbins' Awaken The Giant Within; and The Instant Millionaire, by Mark Fisher.

[EnglishArtsteacher]

I'm not disagreeing with most of this. However, I know bitter men who get girlfriends, and cheerful, optimistic men who struggle to get women. I don't think attitude matters as much as money, social status, and other superficial qualities in dating these days.

I mean, nobody owes you a thing-you're right. I can technically cuss out someone for no reason. I can be a racist (as long as I don't tell anyone). I can ignore anyone who tries to talk to me. I can make fun of a fat person. These are all legal-but does this make it right? Did you ever think people wouldn't be bitter IF people weren't ostracizing them for no legitimate reason?

I say we become more accepting as people, and we'll have less of these bitter people on the internet.

[TheUglyMan]

Your first paragraph is facts.

[martinxcv]

The best credible and accurate response to this mytake.

[EnglishArtsteacher]

@TheUglyMan It's the ugly truth nobody wants to admit.

@martinxcv Yep, I would think so myself.

[yucychan]

Glad that you felt this way. Thank you for believing and respecting us. My beliefs are not representative of all women, but I can generally say most of us don't go for looks, when it comes to bfs or husbands, at least not where I'm from.
Would you believe me if I told you I found Austin Powers extremely sexy? Because I do. I would totally go on a date and hang out with him. And why not, he's funny and is confident of himself. He's not exactly Brad Pitt or Ryan Gosling material, being not good-looking and out of shape. But you don't see him hiding in the corner, worrying about his looks and being rejected and stuff.
And while its good to see the positive tone from you, I think there is one other person that you need to be nice to and show respect to, You yourself.

[Germanium]

Since one of the female opinions pointed out that all the girls' comments are being downvoted by guys, I'm completely baffled as to why?

Like.. just why? I don't see anything wrong with all these opinions. They aren't lies or derogatory.

I mean, I myself feel bad about being me because I feel like I constantly need to improve myself as for I'm not good enough for anyone. But that's not really a reason to downvote these comments since they have nothing to do with that.

[yucychan]

@Germanium
Frankly, it's fine. I don't care for the downvotes, those are my opinions only.
Instead of feeling the need to improve because you feel bad about being yourself, it should be about you feeling good about yourself, that's why you want to improve.
Give yourself some credit, you're not as bad as you think you are.

[Germanium]

@yucychan
Thank you. I'll try keeping that in mind from now on. You made my day a little better

[TheUglyMan]

@Germanium in real life these women wouldn't touch this dude. Because he's become a white knight I guess there are some women on gag that have accepted him a little bit. He still has no results with women. And it's not gonna get any better.

[yucychan]

@TheUglyMan
I beg to differ. I believed things would look up for him.

[martinxcv]

@Germanium Because it is the worst piece of feminist appeasing and arse licking and neurophobia ever. And it is misandric.

[steevo]

@TheUglyMan I believe you are right.
Losing weight, like 100lb, is the healthy answer.
Instant chick magnet.. ;-)
Over 12 months that is less than 2lb a week.
Literally a walk in the park.

[TheUglyMan]

@steevo exactly him becoming a pussy worshiper won't get him shit. Its time he hits the gym.

[BuchitaBuchys]

This is a great take and I wish more men and women alike would do more inner reflection before blaming others for their shortcomings.
I was also bitter and jaded and hating the opposite sex, but that doesn't make you more attractive to them. In fact, as you said, it wedges a further divide.

I wish you well in your further endeavors and happiness in future relationships :)

[FatherJack]

Sounds like you have done a 180... and turned that around. Well done , it's hard , I have had a phase were I attracted psycho nutcases.. and still have the scars from one !!

[BuchitaBuchys]

@FatherJack Thank you, it is hard. I'm still turning myself around lol Yes, I know. I am done attracting the crazies, I hope lol

[Bluemax]

"I was also bitter and jaded and hating the opposite sex"

Huh. After your mytake about not giving up on men, I didn't know that about you. Interesting.

[BuchitaBuchys]

@Bluemax I have a bad relationship with men in general. But it's been getting better.

[Bluemax]

Well, given what you said in that mytake about what has happened between you and men, I thought then and I think now you've done a remarkable job *not* hating men.

And I am happy to hear things are looking up for you.

[BuchitaBuchys]

@Bluemax Haha thank you :)

[Bluemax]

Well said, anon. So well said I wonder why anyone would go anon and not stand by this work.

You seem to be on your way towards getting these internal problems licked.

Would you consider that perhaps you can do more than simply not being bitter at women? I think you can, but I'm curious what you think.

"I know that trying to rationalize with the bitter and depressed is a Sisyphean task..."

Yes, it certainly can be. Especially when people use terms like, "boohoo," or "asshole," or "pity party," or "idiot." I applaud you for not going there.

[SirRexington]

This can be seen from the other side man. You're trying to change yourself for other people instead of doing it for yourself. If she can't accept you for who you are then she isn't worth your time anyway. Also, women have higher standards in average anyway. So it's not a gross generalization.

Don't put all the blame in yourself. It takes two to tango. Also, while no one owes you anything, it's doesn't mean you don't deserve love and that you can't be sad because of your lack of love. People have emotional needs, not having those needs met can seriously effect you mentally.

[lumos]

I didn't read this as him changing for other people. I see it as him coming to the realization that the bitterness and resentment he has held for women has only made him feel more shitty, and that it has in no way been helpful for him to feel that way. And it seems like he's happier now, because his mindset is less toxic.
Otherwise I kinda agree with you on the emotional needs thing, but that's probably the very thing that made him feel bitter in the first place. There's a thin line between feeling lonely but trying to stay positive, vs feeling lonely and blaming everyone around you for it. It's perfectly fine to feel lonely and ofc you shouldn't beat yourself up over it, but neither should you use the people around you as punching bags when they haven't done anything wrong.

[RolandCuthbert]

Keep working brotha! You will get there. Yes, you found out that it is all up to you. Yes, men may have it harder, but that is just the way it is. Do what you have to do, to find happiness! And it seems like you have found the key, you have given yourself permission to do what you need to do to accomplish this task.

I created a take on this very journey. This was absolutely brilliant and do not stop. Continue to grow, learn, and keep improving on yourself, keep striving to be better and you will find love sir. It will come for you in abundance.

To All the Men Who Think They Have Been Friendzoned, Passed Over, etc. Here is a Little Advice... ↗

[TheUglyMan]

You're taking him on a path to failure

[RolandCuthbert]

@TheUglyMan No. . . he will be happy. He will date women and have fun. Then he will meet that special someone.

And you. . . you will still be here at GaG. . . touting MGTOW.

:D

[TheUglyMan]

I'm not MGTOW lol. He still hasn't gotten laid by the way after the change to his "positive attitude"

[RolandCuthbert]

@TheUglyMan Well, getting laid is only a big deal if you haven't gotten laid. I sense he has learned that there are more important things than that.

[TheUglyMan]

Well he's super fat he needs to lose that weight.

[winterfox10]

This! ^^ Another big thing that I had to learn is if I ever wanted to be something more than a "wam-bam-and-thank-you-man" to women (I've never had any trouble getting attention from women), I would need to focus on being friends and actually developing closeness and intimacy with the woman. I used to be straight up about my intentions, and while that did save time, it wasn't getting me what I wanted. Make yourself the best version of you that you can be, and focus on valuing the woman for who she is, and you might be shocked by the progress you make

[Sienna-Rose]

Why has someone foolishly downvoted this?

[winterfox10]

@Sienna-Rose This is the generation that thought online dating was a good idea. The down vote doesn't surprise me.

[Sienna-Rose]

Fair point!

[vishna]

What you were describing sounded really toxic, like it could turn into something truly unsavory. So, it's good you had the will power to address that head on. I think you took the time to see beyond your own ego, and that's a really tough thing to do, to see the flaws you have and how they affect your relationships.
I do think this will fall on a few deaf ears, there are some really awesome men on GaG but also really hurt people who need love but don't understand they are scaring away people, and then there are others who will feel offended, even if this doesn't apply to them, for whatever reasons.

[Bluemax]

"I do think this will fall on a few deaf ears, there are some really awesome men on GaG but also really hurt people who need love but don't understand they are scaring away people"

(Standing ovation) BRAVO!!! BRAVO!!! (thundering applause) BRAVO!!! BRAVO!!! (tossing a rose on stage) BRAVO!!! BRAVO!!!

[cherryphi82]

Bravo! This is an excellent take. Let me tell you... I've struggled with the same things growing up and even now. I thought guys wanted only perfect looking chicks until I realized and saw a lot of average or even less attractive people in happy relationships. This is a great realization and one that makes you very attractive and approachable in my book.

[ObscuredBeyond]

Women and men owe each other a base level of respect. A gal doesn't have to go somewhere with me, unless she promised to and then fails to honor her own word.

But "I don't owe You is no excuse for anyone to go out of their way to be rude. I've met quite a few girls who were over the top rude for no reason.

[lightbulb27]

Well said, good realization, you learned young... that helps!!! That's not too young to start and have no dates, been there, done that.

I'd suggest digging into that nice thing a bit more. Be authentic self, do what you want to do, don't apologize for what you do (being nice). And feel free to project masculine confidence. that's what they seek... they generally don't want "nice" (e. g. needy or submissive), but they do want nice, with
masculine emotional strength. That will feel good, then you'll get interest.

[Anonymous]

I appreciate the post, but when I read a lot of women's response, I can't help but say how many NUMEROUS times women I would know would have no problem going for a complete douche bag who would have no problem disrespecting her over a decent guy who might not be as "cool" / "decent"or "hot". This from teenagers to full grown women. Some just getting by, some with extremely respectable jobs. Yes, someone needs to "work on themselves" and do some "soul searching", but when you encounter numerous women who blow off men who have taken these upon themselves, you have to start asking what's REALLY going on here? by the way, I'm not hurting for dates...

[TheUglyMan]

Facts